First of all, I need to explain, I'm just taking swimming as an example, and the whole article is mainly about children sticking to sports (any kind of sport). Of course, some children naturally like sports, so congratulations to this parent, you can ignore my article.
My child is not very tall, this blames me and her father, for the sake of the child in the future will not be like me, in addition to paying attention to nutrition in diet, I know that exercise is also very critical, after listening to the experience and lessons of all parties, I chose to swim and jump rope. Because I couldn't swim myself, I signed up for my children.
Before I reported for class, I asked the child's opinion, because of the water thing, some people are really afraid, very afraid. If the child is particularly afraid, I really feel that there is no need to force it, and in the future, when it is older, there is an opportunity. After all, there are many sports that can be chosen for children.
But not every parent is so reasonable. Sure enough, in the swimming pool, I saw all kinds of human farces. My child's training place is actually a gym, most parents can sit by the pool to watch their children's training process, four children a coach, for novices, the coach is hand in hand, the other three children are lying on the shore when resting.
1. There is coach guidance, but parents still can't hold back and personally come forward to preach.
At that time, there was a grandmother, every time the coach finished explaining, when it was her grandson's turn to rest, she came forward, took the main point that the coach just said, told the child again, and asked the child not to rest, need to practice, I thought at first this grandmother can swim, but in fact she will not.
A few times ago, I saw the child blushing, obviously unhappy, because she felt that Grandma disturbed her rest and also disturbed her conversations with other children, and she was very tired of Grandma's behavior. However, this very normal reaction of the child is not modest in the eyes of the grandmother, paid money to learn, not serious, only know to play with other children. In the end, the child was forced to be anxious, and began to cry, even so, the grandmother still did not let go, thinking that her grandson was too squeamish.
In the eyes of the children, this is the rest time given to them by the coach, she has just started swimming, there is no coach around, the child naturally does not dare to make a big move. However, our parents are eager for their children to learn in the first lesson, and every action taught by the coach can be perfectly understood and completed with high quality. So we randomly enter their classes, disrupt their rhythms, and put the hat of not taking them seriously. A child who was originally very serious, under your constant psychological hints, he thinks that he is not serious.
2. Seeing that their children are slightly inferior to other children, parents are restless
I think our generation is really anxious, from the moment the child is born, from how much milk to when to learn to climb, learn to walk, learn to talk, wish that their child will always be the fastest one.
But every child is unique, how can it be perfect? In swimming class, four children learn together, there are always strong, there is always backward, once they find that their children are behind, it is particularly uncomfortable. At that time, there was a mother, because the child had been lagging behind, asked to change the coach and changed the child's curriculum to one-on-one VIP.
But the child has cultivated feelings with his classmates, and he also trusts this coach, but he is unwilling, but no matter how stubborn he is, he can't help his mother. After that, because of the change of classes, I didn't see this kid, and I don't know if he will really like swimming in the future.
3. The mother reprimands her son loudly, regardless of the child's face
Some parents may consider that their children are easily distracted, and also in order for their children to learn swimming well, they specially sign up for one-on-one VIP guidance classes. In this case, the child can not be lazy, because the coach is guiding the whole process, that is, the hour of class, the child needs to practice non-stop. But this mother is quite strict, when the child is in class, she is almost the whole time stalking, as long as she finds that the child is lazy, she will call the child's name to remind him. At the end of each training session, the child is required to practice for another 30 minutes on his own.
How can a child who learns to swim not like to play with water? For this little boy, an hour of training is already very tired, and he now wants to play freely in the water like a small fish, meet like-minded friends, and play together. But the mother was not calm. I remember once, she viciously dragged the child out of the swimming pool and loudly reprimanded you for spending so much registration fee to let you learn to swim, are you here to play? If you don't swim well, I'll refund my tuition right now and never come back!
The child only cried and did not dare to refute it, only begging the mother, I will swim well, you do not take me away.
I think there must be more than one such parent. First of all, the child has been training for an hour, it is impossible not to be tired, he wants to get out of class, play in the water, but also to relax himself, why should the parents not let it? Also put on the child's hat of not swimming well, is the child not seriously learning? I think the root of all the problems is that the child does not complete the basic tasks as required by the mother, oh, not the basic tasks, but the mother's extra tasks. Once it is not completed, deny all the efforts of the child, will the child fall in love with swimming?
Seeing these various parents, I was very confused, what was the purpose of letting children learn to swim in the first place? You want your child to fall in love with sports and stick with it, so why do we keep interfering and disturbing them in the wrong way? Can the love of this thing be produced under power?
In fact, the above children's problems, my daughter has, never take the initiative to practice, can be lazy lazy, play with the water after class, will not swim well. For my daughter, swimming lessons are all about playing. But that's not my purpose, and I hope she'll see swimming as a long-term thing.
I remember one time after class, she kept rolling and playing in the water, how could I not be bothered when I looked at her? I am also an old mother with a mortal fetus! So I told her solemnly, why don't you practice swimming well? What does it mean to play like this? My daughter directly contradicted me, you can't swim, you don't know how tired it is to swim once, you will just sit there and ask me to swim. Although I was angry, what she said was not unreasonable, and I did have a bit of standing and talking without waist pain.
I have been a dry duck for more than 30 years, and because of this sentence from my daughter, I forced myself to go into the water to teach myself breaststroke.
Of course, the purpose of my doing this is not to show off myself or bring more pressure to other parents, but I hope that when we ask our children, we will not always have a self-righteous attitude, and never think that we have to pay? When you teach your child, can you understand the child's situation? I told my daughter that mom was going to teach herself breaststroke, and you waited! My daughter looked at me proudly, yes, if you learn, I will swim with you.
When I learned to swim on my own, I learned how hard it is to overcome fear when learning to breathe! How tiring it can be to swim at first! When the child told me about her situation, she really wasn't making excuses. Many times I wanted to give up, but I gave up myself, so why ask my children?
So during that time, I always humbly asked my daughter for advice, studied breaststroke videos with her at home, children are really malleable, they are particularly susceptible to the surrounding environment, seeing me so serious, she was also encouraged. Last summer, I basically took her to the gym every night to swim, she swam in the front, I swam in the back, we cheered each other up, encouraged each other. From the beginning of 400 meters per day, it slowly increased to 700 meters per day...
Later, including jump rope, running, I was involved with her (the emphasis was on participation, cheering each other up, not coercing the kids to have to complete the task). The road to sports is already difficult and hard, and if there is a relative on this road who can accompany you, I think this is a great power for young children. I still remember when the child ran 3 kilometers for the first time, her little red face, a proud face, she was really happy, happy for herself.
Behind an excellent child will be an excellent parent, and the process of raising a child is also the process of their own cultivation.
Wanting a child who is born exceptionally good, I think it's "daydreaming."