Do you know what the blanking effect is?
If a painting is covered with colors, people will think at a glance that there is no room for their imagination.
When a painting is just on a piece of paper, a few simple sketches with a little color.
At this time, there are more places to leave white space, but because of this blank space, people have retained sufficient imagination space, which is the blank effect in psychology.
Life is also a piece of paper, our trajectory is pen and ink, how we run, and finally what kind of painting will be presented.
Too crowded is not good, too crowded, it will appear depressed, patronizing and fearing those things that are too complete, but conscious of the "mutilated beauty" that life should have.
Therefore, to make your life a little more blank, a little less brilliant colors, simple and generous, but can have the purest, most simple happiness.
Psychological research has shown that understanding the true principle of the blanking effect can make people more attractive to middle-aged you and more feminine.
For women, recuperating themselves is king
When I was young, I always felt that life was only a few decades, and I couldn't waste this life in vain.
As a result, at that time, I was busy almost every day, and things were more focused on living in the world and dealing with others.
I care a lot about what other people think, and I want to be a well-liked and extroverted person in other people's populations.
In order to get the approval of others, I had to disguise myself as a freak with "teeth and claws", and I thought that I was pleasing to the lik.
As everyone knows, I have never felt real happiness like this.
I have spent most of my life on the matter of noise, rarely thinking about myself, my world may be lively, but deep inside I am always lonely and lonely.
Later, I stopped forcing myself to do things I didn't want to do.
I began to "rest" myself, listening to songs, reading books, drinking tea, watering flowers, and when I really had nothing to do, I was alone and quiet for a while.
Strangely, at this time, no matter what I do, I am alone, but deep down in my heart I feel the most real happiness that belongs to me alone.
Yi Shu once wrote: "Be quiet, come and go quietly, work hard quietly, and harvest quietly." ”
People reach middle age, too lively is actually not so good, time is long, but also easy to headaches, mental fatigue.
When we begin to "rest" ourselves, we begin to have a quiet space, and it is easier to experience the quiet happiness of life.
Life is not as crowded as possible, leaving a little blank space is more charming
Ruyi in the TV series "Ruyi Biography" has been working for others all her life, so much time seems that there is no point to consider for herself, she is kind by nature, always thinking of bringing warmth to more people.
The emperor wanted to please the concubines, such as Yi's advice;
The concubine was not happy, and Ruyi also wanted to send blessings.
It's not that Ruyi is not good at doing this, it's just that people's energy is limited, and Ruyi regards herself as the savior who saves others, but she has never thought that she should also be her own savior.
Kindness is a good thing, but when we spend all our time helping others, there is very little left for us.
We come into this world to feel the beautiful scenery and meet interesting people, so it is okay to help others, but we should also consider ourselves.
Mr. Lin Yutang said: "When I saw the autumn clouds, I knew that life should not be too crowded, and it should be empty." ”
There are some things that you don't understand when you are young, but you will understand them when you reach this stage of middle age.
Life, ah, can not be too crowded, the real high emotional intelligence has always been to take care of their own at the same time, but also to be able to put others in the heart.
When people reach middle age, they learn to live with subtraction, and they can understand the mysteries of life
I have seen an interview with Liu Jialing before, and the host asked her this question - "Which age do you think is your happiest and happiest day?" ”
In this regard, Liu Jialing replied: "It is now, it is the present moment." ”
Life must have desires, if there is really no desire and no demand, it is no different from salted fish, but if it is bound by desire, life will become very tired.
Don't have anxiety about age and wrinkles, because life, old age, illness and death are processes that everyone will go through;
Don't feel sorry for the things you don't get, because we are not superhuman, and it is impossible to do everything perfectly;
Don't be sad about what has been lost, because people always have to go forward, and on the one-way road, retrograde is fully responsible.
So, how do we live our middle-aged lives?
The best way is to "get by", "go with the flow", and enjoy the moment. As the Song Dynasty monk Wumen Hui Kai Zen Master once said: "If there is no idle thing to worry about, it is a good time in the world." ”