Hello everyone, I'm a tomato mom!
How would you feel if your child were a school bully! I think everyone will be very excited. But in our cognition, most of the children born to their parents are also very good academically. Parents know that they are "scum", and the child's chances of becoming a bully are very slim, because the genetic factors of IQ are still very strong. However, the truth is not necessarily true.
Before, there was a university professor who was very confused, he and his wife were both academic-level figures, but his daughter was a "scum" who often worried about learning difficulties, and his father expressed great helplessness and frustration for such a phenomenon. It seems that genetic inheritance is not necessarily proportional.
Of course, the disappointment of parents cannot be described in words, so what if such a situation comes to a big reversal? What about the "scum" father who gave birth to a "school bully" son? That life is a big contrast.
There is a father, when he was in school, the big exam, the small exam, almost all of them are the bottom one in the class, and they rushed to work after graduating from junior high school. Getting married and having children, just by virtue of his own intelligence, he did not think about how smart his son would be. However, the son gave his father a breath of that year, and he was at the top of almost every exam. Even dad took him out to play during the holidays, he took the initiative to learn homework in the hotel first, although dad was refreshed, but he wanted to go out to play, but he couldn't bear to bother! Heck, that's the gap.
Our own children, every day staring at him to study, urging him to write homework, the grades are not good, people are anxious. People this child, the father took out to play, have to squeeze time to learn, such an excellent son, the father feels as if he did not work hard, all of a sudden won the 5 million jackpot.
Good parents don't necessarily produce good children, they always introduce their own experiences and show off their learning achievements. "In those years, we were all able to learn excellent results, and why don't you work hard under your current conditions?" The narcissism and conceit of parents cannot teach the child's inner chagrin, which will only bring inner harm to the child.
Maybe the reality is that parents are very good, but they don't necessarily teach how good children are. The way of education is not right, and smart children are also badly taught.
Then, such "scum" parents, but raised "school bully" children's families, their own level of knowledge is not high, but the education of their children is appropriately good. Are they lucky that we can replicate?
What should parents do to develop children with healthy personalities and strong learning ability? Educational philosophy is very important!
First of all, the child needs his parents to give him enough companionship and love.
Some parents are very good themselves, but after the birth of the child, they do not get enough care and love from their parents. Many of the people around us who have had very successful careers are busy with work all day and don't have much time to spend with their children. Therefore, from infancy, children do not get a response from their parents in terms of feelings, and they lack insecurity in their hearts.
Due to the lack of love nourishment in the heart, children may face many personality problems in the future, such as anxiety, poor adaptability, inability to bear failure, and so on.
A qualified parent, from the birth of the child should pay attention to their inner growth, in addition to giving the child food, clothing, housing and other material life foundations, but also to create a warm family living environment. Nourish the child's spiritual love, establish an intimate parent-child relationship, and often communicate with the child spiritually and emotionally. In this way, our parents can cultivate truly healthy children, so care and companionship are the most powerful cornerstones for children's future success.
Secondly, parents should guide their children to fall in love with learning, stimulate their children's interest in learning, and cultivate their children's good learning habits.
Children's learning and IQ have a certain relationship, but learning interest and learning habits are the two most important factors.
We must guide children to develop good learning habits, help children build confidence in learning, and stimulate children's interest in learning. When children like to learn, are willing to take the initiative to learn, and master scientific learning methods, they will go to the road of becoming a bully.
In the process of learning, there may be many problems, such as procrastination in doing homework, lack of concentration, and so on. When children have these situations, parents should use the right mentality and methods to guide their children, accept all the shortcomings of their children, give more encouragement, and scold less.
Parents can accompany their children to do more games to exercise concentration, such as 123 wooden people, role play, etc., so that children can slowly improve their concentration in the game, rather than saying a lot of big truths.
Parents, regardless of whether they have been a bully or not, whether they have a high status in society, must know how to "show weakness" to their children, try to help their children solve problems on their own, and parents only act as helpers and guides, so that children are more likely to learn independently and have stronger self-drive.
Finally, parents should help their children set lofty ideals and correct values.
Some parents only see their children's poor academic performance, but they do not know what causes such a situation. Just think, if your child only wants to be a star and make a lot of money, will he still try to learn cultural knowledge? Probably not.
Therefore, we help children establish correct values and guide children to have practical ideals, which is the driving force for children to study hard. For example, if a child wants to be a scientist, a doctor, a teacher, or a policeman, he needs to have a wealth of knowledge. Even if the child wants to be an Internet celebrity, he must also tell the child that in fact, the Internet celebrity who can really be popular for a long time is not low, and he must continue to learn, so learning knowledge is the basis for doing all careers.
Positive learning attitude, correct three views, the child himself should work hard to learn and we want him to study well, the difference between them is very big. Therefore, it is also very important for parents to guide their children to set learning goals in light of the actual situation. Guide children to set ambitious goals and subdivide the goals of each year and month, so that children can grasp their own future.
Of course, learning is not the only way out for children, but also let children know that learning is the closest way to success and happiness.
Interactive Topic: Is your child a bully or a "scum"?