Today's parents often have a misunderstanding, that is, they pay too much attention to their children's education, but forget to maintain a good relationship with their children.
Mr. Lu Xun once said a very classic passage in "The Meaning of Parents' Existence":
"The meaning of the existence of parents is not to give children a comfortable and prosperous life, but when you think of your parents, your heart will be full of strength, you will feel warm, so that you have the courage and ability to overcome difficulties, and thus get the real joy and freedom of life." 」
To put it simply, a good parent-child relationship is the root of education.
"Tell him not to do so much"
Two days ago, #Li Chengru Chinese Father # was on the hot search topic, once again showing his steel father style.
In the variety show "Don't Underestimate Me", when Li Chengru heard that Ji Ji had a cleanliness habit, he blurted out: "Do such a little child already have a cleanliness habit?" ”
Mei Ting echoed "My son has loved to be clean since he was a child", who expected Li Chengru to directly say "tell him not to do so many things" after listening to it.
Li Chengru was known for speaking mercilessly, but he did not expect him to be so harsh on a child.
Li Chengru's "poisonous tongue" was once exaggerated by young people. Under the entertainment ecology of too many people and too little truth, Li Chengru's criticism makes many people feel that they have spoken their hearts, which is particularly enjoyable and cool!
But if this "master of intimidation" is your father, can you still love his "poisonous tongue"?
"Bad evaluator" Dad Li Chengru
Everyone knows that Li Chengru speaks sharply, but he does not know that his own son is sharper.
Previously, Li Chengru's son Li Dahai participated in a variety show called "Kwa is Right", and the program team specially invited Li Chengru as a guest and wanted him to praise his son.
The average father encounters such an occasion, even if he is reluctant to do so, he will praise his son.
But after Li Chengru came, he was like a "bad evaluator" possessed, and he was a bad review of his son.
The host asked him "do you think your son is successful", and Li Chengru directly shrugged: "Without Li Chengru's father, do you know who Li Dahai is?" ”
After saying that, he directly put on his clothes and left, leaving his son Li Dahai alone to awkwardly support the whole show.
In fact, this is not the first time That Li Chengru has smashed his son's field.
In 2013, Li Dahai participated in the "I am not a big star" program, in the relatives and friends to help the link, the father Li Chengru not only did not help his son cheer up, but taunted him: "You have no ability, no ability, what do I boast about?" Aside from looking like a human dog, what can you make me boast about? ”
Not knowing how others feel, Mommy read Li Chengru's evaluation of his son, and only one feeling remained: such a father is too suffocating!
Parent-child relationships are the starting point of education
In life, many parents are actually like Li Chengru, who believe in suppressing education, and feel that giving their children some criticism and a little bit of power can better supervise their children's progress.
Mommy feels that criticism itself is not a bad thing, and proper criticism can guide children to develop in a better direction.
But criticism is definitely not belittling, scolding, and it is not using parental authority to order and pressure.
Li Chengru's blows and criticisms cannot play any positive role except to crush the child's self-confidence and make the child dare not and unwilling to get close to the parents.
Parents always want to make their children independent and excellent through various educations, but they ignore that parents and children are an intimate combination of one life and another life.
Between us and our children, there is first a relationship, and then there is education.
Only by forming a close relationship with children who trust each other very much, education guidance will be successfully realized, otherwise education can only enter the ears of children, not into the hearts of children.
Li Chengru is harsh on his son, and the starting point may be good, but education needs to pay attention to ways and methods, and only by using the right ways and methods can we get good results.
Perhaps one day Li Chengru is not so "poisonous tongue" to his son, the parent-child relationship is eased, and Li Dahai can give him some surprises.