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The legal age of marriage on the mainland is 22 years for men and 20 years for women, that is, marriage is not allowed before these two age boundaries. So, in real life, at what age is it most appropriate for a man to get married and start a family? Regarding the answer to this question, there are three main types of relatively common understanding, namely: marriage can be obtained when the legal age of marriage is reached; first establish a business and then start a family; depending on personal circumstances.
The third situation is relatively niche, adult men and women in the "older leftover men and women" stage has not been urged to marry by their families, and they are not in a hurry to start a family, which will not be repeated here. Around the two understandings of "you can get married when you reach the legal age of marriage" and "start a business first and then start a family", which is more convincing, or more in line with real life, I will first throw bricks and jade -
The "pressure to get married at the legal age"
Take men, for example. Men have reached the age of 22, the physiological age has matured, they can work to make money, they can also speculate about social attempts, of course, they will also create romance with women, and it is not a problem to get married and have children. Men in this period only lacked two major items, one was that their minds were not yet fully sound, and the other was that their own capital could not be self-sufficient (except for the second generation of the rich).
Men in modern society, most of the 22-year-old are still in college, read vocational college or secondary school, enter the society only one or two years, the little salary they earn, is still a person to eat two people and a half full of "moonlight family", most of the time also have to reach out to their parents. A man in a "semi-weaned" situation, you let him get married and start a family, what does he take to raise a family and raise children?
The custom in some mainland provinces is that boys marry as soon as they reach the legal age of marriage. Take Rover, who was born in the "Kite City", as an example, the young man has four brothers and sisters, he is the third oldest, an older brother and an older sister above, and a younger brother below. He studied secondary school at the age of 18, started working at the age of 21, and suddenly took marriage leave after working at the unit for less than a year. Yes, it's marriage leave.
In order to solve their marriage house, his parents gave him a down payment for a small two-bedroom apartment in the city, and the woman's mother's family also married a small bread, which was also a mortgage. The monthly payment for the house and the car cost more than two thousand dollars a month, almost all of Rover's salary. Really, after that, Rover basically did not open the matter of drinking beer, his wife's monthly salary in the supermarket was 2,000 yuan, deducting insurance bus communications and other expenses, "Chaotian Pot" (pancake roll pork head meat) Two people eat once a week. Before the Spring Festival, his small bread was sold, and now he rides a bicycle to and from work, which he says is environmentally friendly.
Not only Rover, there are many local colleagues in the "Kite City" branch office with similar situations to Rover, and the situation is basically "fifty steps and a hundred steps". Once the legal age of marriage is married, the pressure on ordinary people is really not small, boys can not be completely self-sufficient, families with many children, parents can not afford the child's wedding car wedding car wedding banquet dowry, so more take the way of the wedding car down payment, so that the pressure of monthly payment shifts to the newlyweds. How many men aged 22 and 3 can get a monthly salary of more than 5,000 in fourth-tier cities?
Obviously, for most ordinary families, boys marry as soon as they reach the legal age of marriage, and they are obviously a little weak in terms of economic strength.
"Start a business first and start a family later" is too general
This is a very inspirational statement, and at the same time, it is also a reason or excuse for many people to marry late, whose parents do not want their children to have a career? The question is, how long will it take to get started? Is there a specific timeline? The answer is frustrating and there is no timeline.
After entering the society, everyone may use this statement to motivate themselves more or less, that is, to start a business first and then start a family, but the stars have shifted, and after a few years, they are still a desperate worker, or a middle-level or executive with some small rights in their hands. Middle-level or executives do not seem to mean the establishment of a career, the so-called establishment, should be the achievement of their own career, of course, the annual salary of millions of workers is also a successful career. Ask yourself, how many people can achieve such a goal in the cardamom years?
As a result, the team of "older leftover men and women" is getting larger and larger, more and more close to the people, and it has become a matter of many parents' toothache. Although the society is diverse, capital honestly inherits the instinct of "hating the poor and loving the rich", without money to establish a business, the establishment of a business is far away, and the age is not waiting for people, "first establish a business and then start a family" in this way in many people repeatedly show the "pie" that can not be reached, and even the short-lived opportunity does not exist. You say that "older leftover men" don't need to "start a business first and then start a family" to intoxicate themselves or avoid marriage, what excuse is there?
Obviously, "start a business first and start a family later" is often just a very inspirational sentence.
There is only one criterion – "self-sufficiency" is the standard line for entering marriage
"Marry as soon as you reach the legal age of marriage" and "start a business and then start a family" have their limitations and uncertainties, so is there a marriage threshold that everyone can accept and is not difficult to achieve? There must be, and it is easy to differentiate and achieve, that is, the individual achieves self-sufficiency. Notice that it is self-sufficiency, not wealth freedom.
What are the criteria for self-sufficiency? For example, personal income, taking the new first-tier city of Qingdao as an example, if an adult man can have a monthly salary of 8,000-10,000 yuan in Qingdao, he can use this income to pay for mortgage and car loans without squandering food and clothing, and can decently invite his girlfriend to eat seafood dinner, and there are enough deposits in the bank to make him feel solid, at least no longer nibble on the old.
But the monthly salary of 8,000 to 10,000 yuan, which is not a "high salary" (except for special talents) that college students who have just left school can get in Qingdao, which requires time to experience and accumulate, but 27, 8 years old, 30 years old or so can basically be achieved. Qingdao's housing prices are not very outrageous, the south of the city one square meter more than 20,000, Laoshan District guidian, Shibei District, Licang, including Huangdao New District is relatively low, a square meter of less than 20,000, more than 80 square meters of new houses, for people with a monthly salary of 8,000 to 10,000, the monthly supply pressure is not very large. If it is a Local in Qingdao, the family does not worry about the house, has this income, and marriage is "Dongfeng has".
How old is it appropriate for a man to marry? This is not the question of the century, whether it is in the first-tier cities, or the second-, third- and fourth-tier cities, this standard: self-sufficiency does not nibble on the old, the balance of payments has a slight balance, the income is less than the bottom and there are small deposits. So, get married.