What would you do if your child was bullied?
Some parents will say "Whoever hits you, you hit back"! But some children are born kind or timid, unwilling to fight or dare not fight, and teaching children to beat people is not a good thing after all, in the future life "laying mines".
There are also parents who will say "someone beats you, you have to tell the teacher first"! But the teacher is not the child's exclusive nanny, it is difficult to deal with emergencies immediately, in case of encountering a "school bully" who often hits people, the teacher will also have a headache and it is difficult to solve the problem.
There are also parents who will say "even if others are unreasonable, you must say that it does not matter", complaining with virtue, thinking about big things and small things, not willing to let children cause trouble, but often cause children to become cowardly and timid, dare not to protect their own rights and interests, and even develop a flattering personality.
Anyway, all kinds of methods have shortcomings, and there is no simple routine that can solve the problem in one move. Those theories that advocate "fight back", "sue the teacher" or "it doesn't matter" have all fallen behind, and only "low-level" parents will completely pursue them, trying to change the status quo of the baby being bullied.
The key to a real "high-level parent" is to start from the child's inner nature, cultivate the child's ability to "not afford to provoke", and at the same time, in the specific incidents of the child being bullied, it is also necessary to analyze specifically, and use various means flexibly to help the baby solve the current crisis.
How do parents deal with children being bullied?
As a parent, I understand very well how parents feel when they learn that their children are being bullied, and in the case of emotional excitement, many parents can't help but find each other at the first time to "get justice".
But the problem is that since things have happened, the priority is not how to "retaliate" back, but to remain calm and take care of children who are already depressed by bullying.
If we observe the child's reaction, the child's face is full of indifference, and does not take things to heart, then naturally everyone is happy.
On the contrary, if the child keeps shedding tears, the mouth is still constantly "denouncing" the other party, we must pay attention to, at this time the child needs "understanding", not "accusation", once the parents criticize the child's cowardice with a split face, telling him that he should fight back immediately, the child will only become more sad and more anxious, and may not dare to tell the parents that the parent-child relationship is destroyed after being bullied.
So when the child is very sad, we should first give the child comfort, and then ask the ins and outs of the matter, understand the specific link of the problem, whether it is their own fault or the other party's fault, what kind of person the other party is, and think about how to help the child.
In addition, children are different from adults, the way of looking at the problem is also different, when we learn about this matter, in fact, often the child already has a certain idea of solving the problem, at this time we should not rush to tell them how to do, but patiently listen to what he is going to do.
If the child's idea is not reasonable, we can go back to the adult's point of view to give advice, such as encouraging the child to report the problem to the school, or helping the child contact the other party, pointing out the mistake and asking for an apology.
Finally, parents also need to pay attention to the fact that in order to protect their children's mental health, we must emphasize and guide their children to believe that the problem of being bullied is not in themselves, and he does not have to blame and worry about this matter, so that children understand that everything is just a small episode of life and will soon pass.
Let the baby become "unproductive", and the high-level parents do so
1. Pay attention to children's social and emotional education
People are socialized animals, since children enter kindergarten, we should pay attention to children's social and emotional education.
Let children understand from an early age how to properly express their own demands, master the vocabulary of expressing emotions, understand the feelings of others, and how to deal with sudden problems, as long as children can truly integrate into the collective, it is not easy to be bullied.
2. Take your child to the relevant drills in advance
Even when many adults encounter conflict, their minds are "short-circuited" in an instant, not to mention children with poorer adaptability.
Therefore, in order to make the child become "unaffordable", we must also take the child to carry out relevant drills in advance, often maintain communication with the child, and teach the child how to deal with similar problems.
For example, we can play the "bad boy", let the child learn how to protect their own rights and interests, calmly and firmly tell the other party to "stop", if you feel that the other party is still very aggressive, we must also advise the child to walk away, teach the child to learn to seek help from others at the first time.
3. Let the child know how to refuse
Many times the reason why children are bullied is that they usually behave too weakly, do not know how to refuse, and even if they are bullied, they do not know how to resist.
As parents, we should give children the right to self-choice from an early age, realize that children are also an independent individual, have the right to insist on their own opinions, such as when there are children who want to play with children's toys, if the children have obvious resistance, do not be tough to ask the children, so that children understand from an early age that rejecting others is not a mistake.
Crooked Mom Conclusion:
In the process of growing up, many children have had the experience of being bullied, and how parents deal with it will affect their children's lives.
Whether it is to let the child for tat or teach the child to say sorry, it is not the practice that smart parents should do, and the real high-level parents should make the child unbearable in school.
Today's topic: What do you do when your child is bullied?
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