The most painful thing in life is "life and death". "Life and departure" and the day of goodbye, "death farewell" is to say goodbye to their past and their relatives completely, and after a few years, the footprints of their own lives will disappear from the world, and slowly everything will return to dust, and these are not in the thinking of those who are "far away".
We have a fear of "death", which is an unknown region in the eyes of our living beings, and we can only guess at the unknown, because once we have verified it in person, we cannot say it again. Occupations and topics related to "death" are also cautious when discussing, for fear of accidentally touching the nerves of others.
A profession that is little known about – hearse driver
There are thousands of industries in the world, and there is a proverb that says: Three hundred and sixty lines, the line out of the yuan. As long as you work hard in an industry, you can also have outstanding achievements, and there is no distinction between high and low in the industry. When we say which industry is better and which industry is slightly worse, we artificially label those industries.
We all have a certain inferiority, so some jobs when we have not yet understood, we will exclude it from the occupation they want to choose, the hearse driver profession is like this, we know very little about this profession, basically will not mention in life, we have always used traditional concepts to look at this profession, in fact, this profession is the same as other occupations, are legitimate, legal and dedicated to society occupations.
In the eyes of the older generation, "taboo" is more important, because in the hearts of the older generation, they still believe in something superstitious.
What are our first impressions of hearse drivers? Behind a minibus was a coffin, the resting place of the deceased, with mourning music playing on the car. In fact, the hearse driver is not only the driver's job.
We often say that human life is only once, and if you lose it, you will not have the opportunity to start again, and when you first encounter the death of your relatives, you must be helpless and overwhelmed when you first experience the pain of the death of your relatives. Because of the professional nature of the hearse, the hearse driver is familiar with the funeral process and can assist the families of the deceased to a large extent.
Our prejudice against hearse drivers needs to change, unlike ordinary drivers, hearse drivers are not only good driving skills, but more importantly, high psychological endurance. Every hearse driver will have a certain discomfort when he first enters the industry, and the people who can really work in this industry for a long time are really strong.
In addition to strong psychological stress resistance, hearse drivers must also have a delicate mind, because the content of their daily work is to meet people whose hearts are extremely fragile. Polite words such as "goodbye" and "hello" that ordinary people usually say are taboo for hearse drivers, and experienced hearse drivers will remind newcomers to pay attention when training new people. Sometimes what we think of as good intentions is precisely the malice in the eyes of others.
Hearse drivers have their own understanding of their profession, they always have a sense of reverence for their profession, they send the dead on the last journey, they build the last residence for the dead, they sort out the last remains for the dead, they take care of the dead's resting place. Hearse drivers should not be despised by us in today's society.
Hearse driver's hardship is not imaginable, hearse driver is also a representative of the year-round, do not know when to receive a phone call, sometimes in the middle of the night to receive a call also have to get out on time, with engaged in this industry for more than thirty years of drivers said, hearse driver's phone is not allowed to shut down, to be on call, and to be a few minutes or even dozens of minutes early, to prevent encountering unexpected things.
The belief of the hearse driver is that it is better to arrive early and wait than to arrive late to affect the mood of the family. Some hearse drivers will joke that while our industry is not a "decent" job, we work to give dignity. This kind of joke is actually full of heartache, and it also reflects the serious prejudices that still exist in today's society.
The best way to fight back against prejudice is to strike back with facts, and in the career of hearse drivers they will see many joys and sorrows of life.
Witnesses
The first time I learned about it is an old predecessor who has been engaged in the profession of hearse driver for many years, we temporarily call him Lao Huang, as an old senior who has been in this profession for a long time, he has not complained about the industry he is engaged in because of the prejudice of others or verbal contempt, Lao Huang said that every time he has a life, he will always be prepared half an hour in advance, go to the family of the deceased, one is afraid of temporary problems, it will be late; the second is that he has been engaged in so many years, and has a lot of experience in funerals. Some suggestions can be given to the families of the deceased.
Lao Huang said that after so many years in the hearse driver industry, some things have gradually become downplayed, but every time he drives to pick up the deceased on the last journey, he still can't help but sigh in his heart, some are young youths, some are white-collar workers with good career development, and some white-haired people send black-haired people.
Every time you will lament the difficulty of life, but as a good hearse driver, it is not allowed to shed tears, your tears will deepen the grief of the living, but also disrespect for the deceased, because you are the witness of the last journey of the deceased, no matter what the cause of the deceased died, in the last trip of life to give them the highest respect. There is an old Chinese saying that goes, "The dead are great."
What the elders said is very reasonable, the responsibility of the hearse driver is to safely send the deceased to the last residence of life, we cannot comment on whether the life of others is valuable, whether it is left with regrets, the hearse driver is not a summarist of life, but a witness on the last road of life.
When Xiao Wei first got out of the hearse, he made a mistake that hearse drivers can't make - tears.
That was the first time Xiao Wei and the seniors out of the car, to the place to know that the deceased is still a junior high school student, excellent academic performance, just because of a failed exam, failed to withstand the blow of suicide, Xiao Wei saw the father of the deceased at the first sight found that the father's clothes are very messy, when going downstairs also broke the knees and arms, the mouth kept saying: "Look at Dad again, look at Dad again, we shouldn't say so excessive things to you, look at Dad again..."
On the way back, Xiao Wei has been thinking back to what just happened, or so small child, the journey of life is still long, the result is that it disappeared at the age of flowers, and then think of the tearful old father, Xiao Wei can't help but cry, and the seniors who are in the same car with him said: "Xiao Wei, you are too unprofessional, we hearse drivers can't cry when they get out of the car."
Xiao Wei once wanted to say whether the seniors were too ruthless, but the next words of the seniors made Xiao Wei wake up. "The funeral business we are engaged in is not only to make the deceased leave with dignity, but also to give comfort to the living.
Remember, no matter how we see our profession from the outside, you are a witness to the last journey of the deceased's life, and don't shed tears. Once your tears make the living more sad, then you must not be a qualified practitioner. Xiao Wei, to use his heart to understand the story written by the deceased with life and death, and to understand how to live better from it. ”
After listening to the words of his predecessors, Xiao Wei did not shed tears when he got out of the car in the future, but he still couldn't help but sigh. After Xiao Wei received a job transporting brain death patients, Xiao Wei did not think much about it on the way to the hospital, until he arrived at the hospital to understand the original commission, the patient was dead, and the doctor was asking the family whether they were willing to donate organs, because the patients in the hospital just needed it.
Only the deceased's sister was in the hospital, and his parents were still far away in the mountains, and after the sister called her parents, she came back and said: "He can continue his life in others in another way, maybe it is a fate, but we don't want others to know that he is incomplete, we want him to be buried like a normal person." ”
In the face of the family's request, the hospital agreed, Xiao Wei also rethought his life and his career, seeing more life and death, seeing more crying, sometimes really thinking about what the meaning of life is? We are so small, everyone is so different, on this last journey it seems to have seen a variety of lives, a variety of endings. All we can do is do our part.
Generally speaking, we all have a certain understanding of a certain occupation before choosing to engage, especially those occupations that are not often concerned by the public, if we choose to be cautious, because most of the occupations of the information is very little, if there is no adequate psychological preparation in advance, there will be a long period of adaptation after really engaging. However, for some adaptable people, even if they do not know it in advance, they will adapt well to the new profession.
Unexpectedly become a witness to the last journey
Da Liu originally had a stable job, but Grandma's sudden illness increased the burden on the family, Da Liu's salary could not afford the medical expenses, in order to let Grandma get better medical treatment, Da Liu decided to find a higher salary occupation, and the hearse driver thus walked into Da Liu's vision.
Da Liu does not know much about the hearse driver, if it is not to treat the grandmother, Da Liu will not consider this profession, after all, in life for the hearse driver everyone is taboo, can not say, can not look at it, Da Liu also considered this, so at the beginning of the engagement only held the idea of saving enough medical expenses to resign, it can be said that the purpose of Da Liu is not pure. But no one thought that Da Liu had done it until now, saving enough medical expenses, and Grandma's illness was cured, and Da Liu was still working as a hearse driver.
At the beginning, Da Liu still had a sense of fear about his work, and when he first saw the deceased, Da Liu was also startled, and the surrounding atmosphere rendered the desolation in Da Liu's heart.
But when Da Liu saw that the predecessors skillfully carried the remains of the deceased and helped the family to deal with some affairs, Da Liu reacted that the hearse driver did not encounter such a terrible thing as the TV performance, and the experienced hearse driver would become the "main heart" in the hearts of these families, and many funeral matters hearse drivers understood.
Looking at the figures of the predecessors, Da Liu for the first time looked at the industry of hearse drivers, Da Liu believes that hearse drivers and other professions are normal, compliant, legal, reasonable existence, and not simply can drive, in the work to maintain a high degree of concentration, to standardize their professional spirit.
Da Liu was impressed, Da Liu wanted to really understand the profession of hearse driver, and Da Liu wanted to continue to work. After learning of Da Liu's thoughts, Da Liu's relatives and friends all persuaded Da Liu to change jobs, especially Da Liu's grandmother.
Grandma thinks that it is because of her own medical expenses that her grandson will go to work as a hearse driver, and will be pointed out, and has been persuading Liu to find another job. Friends also advised Liu to have a high degree and do any job, why is he a hearse driver?
Da Liu has his own ideas, he believes that hearse drivers should not be pointed out because of traditional prejudices, and hearse drivers are also engaged in the work of contributing to the people. If everyone doesn't want to be a hearse driver, what happens to the deceased's last journey? They have worked hard all their lives in the world, and they cannot let their last journey be unstable.
Da Liu continued to struggle in the profession of hearse driver with firm faith, and at the busiest time, Da Liu could receive more than twenty calls a day, and Da Liu could send away more than a thousand dead people in a year. Today, Da Liu has fully adapted to the life of a hearse driver, and he wants to give the deceased more respect and let them go on the last journey safely and steadily in their lives.
Sometimes Da Liu also wonders if the phone he gets can not ring, so that it represents that the family in the world is complete. Even when the phone really rings, Da Liu will sort out his thoughts and devote himself to work with a full mental state, even if Da Liu's relatives still don't quite understand Da Liu's choice now, I firmly believe that Da Liu will eventually use his own efforts to tell everyone that hearse driver is a legitimate profession.
Whether it is Lao Huang, Xiao Wei or Da Liu, they are all excellent hearse drivers, because there are people like them, those who have passed away can complete their last journey, because people like them exist, there will be people who pay attention to the profession of hearse driver, and more people will eliminate the prejudice against hearse drivers in the past.
For the hearse driver I have high respect, their obscurity makes the world more beautiful, I hope that the profession of hearse driver can get more people's attention and face, the world's profession is not high or low.
Hearse drivers deserve the respect of our society, and only by reducing prejudice can our society make great progress.