01
"Yu Ion Yu Fu" wrote: "Dry Si with boat, Heat with Qiu." ”
To do things, we must consider the long term, maintain the boat in drought, dry winter clothes in summer, and don't always hold on to the Buddha's feet temporarily.
For a family, it is necessary to follow the rules of "the predecessors planted trees, the posterity cools down", and through the efforts of several generations, the family is becoming more and more prosperous. Things that are quick to succeed, try to do as little as possible, and kill chickens and eggs need to be avoided.
However, there are always some people who, for their own selfish interests, or covet the money in front of them, destroy the inheritance left by the ancestors and lose the current family affection.
It is not difficult to find that in the family, most people without vision have the following four characteristics, and one of them must be corrected.
02
First, it violates the ancestral precepts and only cares about immediate interests.
There is such a point of view in the "Yan Family Training": "Rope its ancestral martial arts, and be cautious and eventually pursue the distance." ”
When we are reminiscing about our ancestors, we must also remember their instructions and carry forward their excellent spirit. In this way, we can achieve "a generation is stronger than a generation".
Many families, relying on the efforts of generations, make the family business bigger and stronger. Those who do business expand the scope of business and increase fixed assets; those who study, take the examination for meritorious names, and the blue is better than the blue; those who learn crafts pass on the torch, raise their skills to a new realm, and coincide with the development of the times.
However, some people have done things that violate the ancestral precepts, and they still stubbornly believe that people should not "follow the rules."
In "Zhuangzi Getaway", there is such a story: a family in the Song Dynasty has lived by rinsing for generations. Such a job is very tiring and the income is not high. The most uncomfortable thing is that in winter, when you put your hand into the cold water, it hurts like a bone, and the skin will crack.
In order to be able to work well in winter, the ancestors invented a plaster to protect the hands. The recipe for the plaster is a secret in the family.
There is a tourist who inquires and finds this family, willing to buy the secret recipe with hundreds of gold.
After family deliberations, the secret recipe was bought. Unbeknownst to this family, the traveler dedicated the secret recipe to King Wu, got a large fiefdom, and became a local tycoon.
For the sake of immediate interests, the loss of the things of the ancestors, and the lack of a way back for the younger generations, such a family is laughable. In real life, we have similar people around us.
03
Second, lack of ability, only nibble on the old, do not make a living.
When encountering the old people, everyone hates.
But many parents will not reflect, why do such people appear in the family? Most of the old people are cultivated by their parents. Because of the excessive coddling of children, they have developed the habit of "clothes to reach out, food to open their mouths".
If children are found to be old and cannot repent, then after the death of their parents, the family will decline.
The Ming Dynasty literary scholar Feng Menglong wrote a story called "Xu Lao's Servant Became a Family in Indignation". Inside, there was a man named Yan Shibao, who had been idle for a long time, eating, drinking, and gambling, and killing his parents alive. After the death of his parents, he mingled with a group of second-rate children and never made a living. Over time, the thousands of acres of land and several houses left by his parents were sold.
In the Cai Gen Tan, it is written: "Ask the ancestors of Deze, what I enjoy in my body is, and remember the difficulty of its accumulation; ask the well-being of my descendants, and those who are in my body are, and we must think about the ease of its overthrow." ”
When we are happy, we should think about what our ancestors did for us, and be grateful; if the younger generations are not doing well, we must think about whether the favors left behind are too few, and we must reflect.
The family has an old family, which is a matter of two generations. Therefore, parents who are unable to raise their children, children who cannot earn a living alone, are people without vision.
It is better to seek wealth than to seek wisdom and ability. Property can be spent, and ability is an endless "asset".
04
Third, there is endless dispute and do not know how to hug the group for warmth.
According to common sense, in a family, there are more people, we must find a way to separate the family. In the countryside, as long as the children have a family, they live separately from their parents. The family's fields and houses are separated, and they are operated separately, and in time, they can become bigger and stronger.
In fact, the purpose of separating families is to maintain distance and avoid family conflicts, not to let the family "disperse".
For some people who have family businesses and family workshops, if they are separated, it may lead to the decline of the family. After all, some big things require the ability of the team.
The writer Feng Haipeng told an intriguing story. An antique, divided into two, is collected by A and B respectively. In order to add value to the antiques, they all wanted to buy the other half, negotiated for a long time, and still had a stalemate.
After some time, A figured it out and decided to give half of the antique to B. A Xingchong rushed to B's house. B said, "What I don't get, you don't want to get." What are you going to do, I've destroyed half of the antiques. ”
In real life, many brothers and sisters have the idea of "B". Since you can't get the full benefit, you should "go against the grain" and destroy everything.
Family development requires team spirit, not arguing and tearing family affection apart.
05
Fourth, the brothers and sisters are opposed, and the strong bully the weak.
There is a social way called "cold temple burning incense".
That is to say, when the other party is not rich and wealthy, go to make friends and help more. When the other party is rich, he naturally has an emotional card and has a backer.
Smart people understand that helping weak families not only get a love card, but also reflect the brotherhood and establish their own image. It's a multitude of things to do in one fell swoop.
Those who have no vision would rather seduce outsiders than help their families. He tried to find excuses to break with his relatives in order to evade the responsibility of supporting his parents and pulling his brothers along.
06
How far a person can go is his arrogance as a person and the height of his heart.
In "Later Journey to the West", Tong Arm Xian said: "The letter will be good on foot, and it will be recognized." ”
Man, no matter where you go, you must remember the road you have traveled and remember to come back.
We start from the family, go to a foreign land, go to the rich, and walk into the dream. When you come to a certain point, you must look back, remember the feelings of flesh and bones, remember the kindness of your ancestors, and then take your family with you.
A truly far-sighted person can stand at the top, not that he can fly, but that he knows how to consolidate the road of life and win over the people around him.
May you and I, with lofty ambitions, and our homes as wide as the sea.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.