For young children, the birthday party is probably one of the most anticipated shows of the year.
Although birthdays are nothing special for a considerable number of adults, they will lament the faltering time of one year.
But for children who are not familiar with the world, "birthday" is a big thing. Because this is the only day of the year when they can "do what they want", can they not look forward to and desire such a day?
However, a ms. Zhang in Jiangsu, at her son's 11th birthday party, replaced the "Pikachu" shape birthday cake that her son was looking forward to with a cake full of textbooks.
And that's not all, she left a word on the cake: The earth is not destroyed for a day, you have to write your homework.
In this way, she wanted to remind her son to review well and not to play games every day.
Who knew that when his son saw this cake, he felt aggrieved and broke down and cried.
"If you don't want anything, you will give something", for the result of the child's mother's temporary decision, I don't know what she feels in her heart, do you think it is very interesting to give her son a "pit" hand?
It's like:
"The company's annual meeting, the leader waved a big hand, and replaced the lottery gift with a "overtime package" gift certificate.
Will you also crash? Or do you think the leader is really humorous and interesting?
If Ms. Zhang really hopes that the cake she has moved can remind her son to study hard, I think she will most likely be disappointed.
This "see the needle in the needle" type of education, do not need to do it
Such behavior, which hurts self-esteem and is not trustworthy, can have an effect is to see the ghost.
The only effect is probably that everyone remembers it deeply, and in the future, this image can be taken out on the child's "college banquet", "wedding day" and other such days for everyone to have fun together, see how "pitiful, weak and helpless" the protagonist is in childhood, and then sigh that time is like shuttle, and the flow of years is like water.
All along, parents probably have a misunderstanding about education, thinking that education must be ear-to-ear and need to be reminded from time to time, or whether the child needs to be clicked or not, everything is based on the parents' thoughts, as long as the parents are willing, they can educate their children at any time.
So you will see that whether it is at the dinner table or on the sofa, whether indoor or outdoor, as long as parents "want" no matter when and where, they can grab the child to preach, regardless of whether the occasion is appropriate, whether the child is happy or not, they are cool.
They forget that people need "space" and that they were dismissive of their parents' education as children, or that "this hand" is the only means by which they inherit from their parents.
However, the times are progressing, how can people still be in the same place?
Educational means are learned, not without successful cases, parents also need to play less mobile phones, learn more methods to do ah.
Parents' whim lacks understanding after empathy
Many contradictions in life stem from the lack of "empathy" thinking.
The central meaning of empathetic thinking is to put yourself in the shoes of others, think more from the perspective of others, and understand problems
Therefore, people who can often think differently will give people the impression of empathy and tolerance.
Ms. Zhang only took her own thoughts as the starting point and did not consider her son's mood.
If she could think differently, from her son's point of view, wondering if she could be happy and ashamed if she received such a birthday cake? Or do you say that you will also be sad and disappointed?
But empathy still needs a degree, not too "kind", not "the benevolence of women".
For example, if a child plays games every day, should it be forbidden?
If it is because of the perspective of "playing after the homework is done anyway" and "I am playing with my mobile phone after work" to "empathize" without preventing my child from playing games, it is wrong.
It is true that the combination of work and leisure, the game is not completely untouchable, but "every day" to play, is also too much. Isn't there nothing else to do in free time besides games?
Reading books, doing housework, doing homework... Which one is not something that takes time and effort?
If the child is not willing to do it, it is also because of the problem of family education, in the end, it is still necessary to find reasons from the parents themselves.
Education does not need to be reminded at all times, it should be targeted
Education is a very complicated thing, each child is different, everyone's family environment, social environment and campus environment are different, how to educate is thousands of people, and so on.
The "Family Education Promotion Law" that began to be implemented this year tells us that the majority of parents need to assume family responsibilities and attach importance to family education.
There is also a need for greater focus on ways and means.
Just like catching a snake and grasping seven inches, education also needs to accurately grasp the key points of the problem and then start to solve it.
If Ms. Zhang really wants his son to repent and not play games every day, she should not express her demands in such an almost "prank" way.
This kind of education method regardless of the occasion seems to be false or true, and her son will only feel wronged, but will never be enlightened.
She should seriously find a suitable time and occasion to talk with her son, talk about her requirements and expectations, and set goals with her son in a serious way, so that her son knows that they care about their children's learning, and let children know the importance of learning.
Have you had any successful or unsuccessful educational experiences? In the comments section, we can talk about it together.