Author/Pond Fish
01. Love should be a fairly long-lasting fascination;
Zhou Guoping believes that the survival time of love must have a minimum limit. If it is less than this limit, it cannot be called love. Obsessed and long-lasting, there is mutual playfulness and appreciation, and love is such a tireless playfulness and appreciation.
In contrast, liking is much shorter.
Whether we like someone or something, this simple emotion of liking is always easy to come and go, may arise in one second, but may also die in the next second. There can be many reasons to like it, and at the same time, the reasons for not liking can also change rapidly.
In high school, my table mate liked a boy just because the boy came up with a math problem she couldn't do, but after a week she didn't like him, because the boy cut a particularly ugly hairstyle, and she suddenly felt that he had become not good at all.
Love, that's not the case.
When you fall in love with someone, you often can't say what the specific reason is, but it is precisely this state that can make people lose, because the same is that the reason for not loving is also difficult to find, and even if you have found it, you can say that there are many bad things about this person, but you find yourself still desperately in love.
Whether boys or girls love someone, they will be extremely inclusive. This kind of inclusivity will make the relationship between two people stronger and last longer.
If it is just a simple like, or a good feeling, you may be able to find an excuse to turn away at any time, wave your hand without taking away a cloud, and be as dashing as you want. In fact, it may not be that you are really so dashing, it is just that you don't love each other.
If you don't love, you won't have a strong remembrance, and basically you won't have any uneasy thoughts.
What kind of mentality is it?
Seeing such a passage: I want to pestering you and giving up on you, I want to stop contacting you, I will want to contact you again, I want to love you, I don't want to love you, I want to quit your world, and I am afraid of really losing you. Since separating from you, I have found myself powerless to fall in love with anyone anymore.
Yes, this is the kind of sequelae that is most likely to be left in the short term after truly loving someone and then separating. This person will always remain in your mind, will affect your next choices, and will touch your emotions. The lethality of love is much stronger than that of love.
02: Love is essentially a feeling that points to the weak
Of course, this kind of weakness may not be really weak, but because of the love of someone, resulting in a "he (she) needs my protection" mentality.
Zhou Guoping said: Regardless of men and women, when they are in true love, they must be gentle. To love someone is to hurt her, to spoil her, to pity her. It hurts her because she suffers. Pity her, because she is weak. Women are the same for men, even the lucky women have times to suffer, and even strong men have weak times, so gentle care always has its opportunities and reasons.
Here, there is a particular difference between liking and loving.
Because when we like a person, most of the time it starts with a worship of the strong. To put it bluntly, when we initially have a good feeling for a person, it is almost always because there is something in the person that attracts us, it may be something that we do not have, or it may be a certain quality that we care about, and so on.
In short, the subconscious reaction of liking is to seek dependence, while the ultimate purpose of love is to give protection, and the two can almost be said to be diametrically opposed.
When you just like a person, you are easy to see the other party as indestructible, you are only appreciating the advantages and benefits of this person, you want it to be flawless, maybe one day later, you suddenly find that this person is not as powerful as you think, it turns out that he is a layman, it turns out that he will also cry, there will be negative emotions... When you see each other's wretchedness, it will definitely affect your liking.
But love is the opposite of the mood.
If you love someone, you see a person's embarrassment and tears, no matter what the image of this person has been in you, whether it is flawless or not, but at that moment, you will definitely have a heartache and protective mind, and you will not affect the image of this person in your place because you see its bad side.
On the contrary, the more the other party shows vulnerability in you, this person may become alive in your place, you will be happy that he regards you as a person who can pour out his heart, thinking that he is different, the more you will love deeply, the more you want to make him happy at all costs.
Moreover, like a person, you will still think with reason, two people in the process of getting along, you will continue to pay attention to their emotions, if the other party makes them unhappy, or where to do not do well enough, you will most likely fight back, or adjust their own pay ratio to a certain extent.
That is to say, we like a person, but also care about our own interests, in this relationship to think more about ourselves, rather than each other, which is completely human instinct.
But love may make you go beyond your instincts to a certain extent.
Because when you love someone, the mind that you think is "weak and needs your protection" will make you constantly think from the other person's position, and when you are doing something, you will subconsciously take the interests of the other party into account. At this time, who you think more for, may depend on how deep this love is, some people love the head, can not extricate themselves, may not think about themselves at all, just blindly hope that the other party is good.
Because as long as you see that the person you love is good, the person who gives is also happy. I think this is one of the highest realms of love, and while perfecting each other, I also love Ya and Wu.
Even if, to outsiders, this person is actually very powerful and may not need any protection from you, you still can't control yourself. Just like love itself, it is originally unclear, some people, love is love, and some people, no matter how much they do, always do not love.
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