Cultivate the most interesting and practical psychology every day
In recent years, the popularity of "broken away", the original concept of break away is from the famous Japanese writer Hideko Yamashita 's book "Broken Away", which is to say that people's lives, in the tidying up at home, need to clean out useless or dislike things in time, make their rooms more tidy and comfortable, and further enhance their sense of happiness.
Psychologists point out that if people can break away from these four things, their hearts will become stronger. A person who is not strong inside cannot give up these 4 things.
procrastinate
The Chinese Academy of Social Sciences once did a survey, through the questionnaire of domestic college students and working groups, more than 80% of domestic college students and office workers have a certain degree of procrastination.
At present, it seems that procrastination occupies such a high proportion, and it also affects people's normal lives to a certain extent.
Famous psychologists have pointed out in their research that one of the most important influencing factors of whether people succeed or not is human willpower.
If you habitually procrastinate, it will affect the person's entry into the good crowd. If you suffer from procrastination, here are some ways you can try to change your status quo.
Find motivation. The famous psychologist Doreen McClelland once proposed that a person's actions are influenced by inner motivation. If people find their motivation, they will be proactive and more efficient.
Make a detailed plan. People procrastinate because there is no goal and plan, so for these people, you can make yourself a detailed time plan, according to the schedule of one by one, can greatly change the status quo, so that you no longer miss many things and opportunities because of procrastination.
Inferiority
Once a person has low self-esteem, he will not be able to know himself objectively and rationally, and he will not be able to see his own advantages. Doubt yourself before doing things, worry that you won't do well.
Such a psychology will bring a lot of trouble to yourself in life, and you will cower and shrink in doing things, and you will not be able to show your truest self. If you want to give up this inferiority complex. You can believe in the power of psychological cues,
Amy once mentioned the power of psychological cues in her speech, she believed that people can pretend to be successful first, and in the continuous psychological cues, let themselves continue to work hard until they can really succeed.
She had done an experiment before, and the two groups of people were tested in two different postures, cowering and confident, and after a while, she found that the confident group of people was in very good shape in all aspects.
Prove that this positive psychological cue can lead people to let go of low self-esteem and become more confident.
please
There are many people who are sensitive or inferior in heart, who will take the initiative to humble others psychologically, and can even wronged themselves to complete others. They can keenly find each other's emotional changes in interpersonal communication, and if there is a problem, they will first find the reason from themselves, so that everything will worry about their own poor performance and make others dissatisfied.
It's also very hard to live like this, and they want to be able to get satisfaction through the approval of others.
They will take the initiative to be the person who is active in the atmosphere, willing to be the first to break the silence in the communication, and make the comfort of the people around them their responsibilities in the social, which is also a typical flattering personality.
Many times, people with such personalities are not happy, and even feel very hard. What should such a person do?
First of all, we must develop a clear sense of boundaries, which is a kind of respect for each other and a kind of protection for our own hearts.
A strong person can pay better attention to their own inner needs, they know that only by putting themselves in the most comfortable state, can they better take care of others, if they do not care about the feelings of the people around them, they will base their joys and sorrows on the feelings of others, so that they are not only not respectful enough to others, but also irresponsible to themselves.
Comfort zone
Everyone needs to get out of their comfort zone in their growth, so that they can break through themselves, improve their abilities, and tap their potential. Every day, try to get out of your comfort zone, expand your horizon step by step, and leave the area where you were originally adapted to get better.
There is a flowerpots effect in psychology, which refers to the fact that if people expect to stay in the "garden" that they think is comfortable, they become sluggish in a soothing environment and lose the motivation to progress.
Eventually, one's own will will also be exhausted, and willpower is most likely to be slowly consumed in the pursuit of pleasure. Once you indulge yourself, you will stop trying to improve and waste your time.
If a person wants to change from ordinary to excellent, he must experience a little pain every day and let himself bravely jump out of his comfort zone. It is also a necessary condition for people to be able to succeed.
People can get rewards where their time is, and being able to give up these four things will make themselves more precious of precious time, and they will become more confident.
Don't try to please anyone, you can be brave to be yourself. In this way, you can make yourself feel more comfortable, jump out of the original comfort zone, find your true self, and prove your excellence to others.
Only by letting go of these four things can people live happier in social life, show their truest hearts, and make themselves a better self in their minds.
- The End -
Author | Tommy
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
参考资料：Vogel, D. L., & Wester, S. R. (2003). To seek help or not to seek help: The risks of self-disclosure. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 50(3), 351.