· This is the 3457th original debut article with a word count of 4k+ ·
· Sister Shui | Article Follow Qin Shuo Circle of Friends id: qspyq2015·
Song Xiaonu was really a woman as hot and intense as the sun.
At 4 p.m. on August 4, her husband Zhang Yuhuan was acquitted, and she waited 9,778 days to avenge him, endure the hardships of life, and raise her two sons to grow up. Her sentence "He owes me a hug, this hug, I thought about it for many years... From 1993 to today he should hold ", in order to raise children, she married another man, her identity is already an ex-wife.
She and her current husband hugged each other for warmth and supported each other, although they were all looking for their children to rely on, but they had the deepest compassion for each other, "I tell my story, he cries with me; he tells his story, I cry with him." "They can understand each other's inner pain and support each other's actions in reality, and since they can't let go of the man's thing, do it." So, she looked up the dictionary to write a letter of redress, she had surgery for a ruptured bladder and did not want to live, the current husband encouraged him to visit her ex-husband, fate to stay up, what she wanted to do was not finished, how to die.
One senior said, "He, he, she, there are ten thousand possibilities to mess up the relationship, and as a result, these ten thousand possibilities do not appear, probably because of love and the wisdom of survival..."
| Suddenly I thought of the song "Survival" of the second-hand rose, which sang: "Happiness is like grinding in the sky and whispering, and the dangerous moments of flowers and greenery are all around you." ...... Why do people let people suffer, why do people shed tears for people, why do people oppose people,...... Survival, my bladder, oh I say fate. ”
The previous wife murder case was continuously exposed in the media, making people doubt feelings and doubt life, and the story of this woman and her husband seemed to save a little twist and turn of the world's hearts, it was simple, simple, sincere, direct, like direct sunshine.
The greatest warmth in the world is nothing but a lifetime of companionship and never give up. Song Xiaonu is ultimately happy, the ex-husband and current husband she met are both good people, one who gave her love and stories, although bitter, can only be regarded as memories of love and bumpy stories of suffering; one gave her companionship and support, and both of them have a long-term spirit. I have written several articles saying that no matter what you insist on for twenty or thirty years, you can harvest the quality of your life and turn yourself into a work.
In the "Thirty Only" TV series, Gu Jia's husband was also imprisoned for blowing up the fireworks factory. From the beginning to the end, Gu Jia is dealing with the big things and small things around this man, the company's affairs (taking business, engaging in relationships, dealing with tricky things), eating, drinking, eating and wearing in life (accurate to the details of every selection and supplies, from face wash tissues and Band-Aids), and even sorting out his little third child's emotional problems to send her to start a new life, closing the fireworks factory, handling assets and follow-up compensation, etc., everything is done by her.
In the era of the big heroine, women are really great and tired. Song Xiaonu's ex-husband, the words are not very clear, not good at expression, how others can not love, but their "husband" himself to protect himself hurt himself, his life is too pitiful, too innocent, she can not put down, she wants to regain dignity for him.
In fact, love is roughly what you want to love, and you are willing to spend your whole life immersed in the feelings you have woven, where there is music, there are buildings, there are kingdoms, there is the meaning of life, and there are all the things that the worldly material and circumstances cannot be broken.
People have to live with some spiritual pillars and beliefs. Love is definitely a spirit. Now the simple love in the world is really getting less and less, because people feel that the time of life is not enough to spend, they are not willing to spend their lives doing this useless thing, and there are many things to do, such as money to earn, family to raise, mobile phones to see, career to do, the world to see, to know a lot of people, to run a lot of relationships, to have a better life, a bigger world...
Gu Jia's husband, an artist and "big child". In fact, there are many husband and wife relationships in China, and China's private economy is actually partly a "boss lady economy", they manage their husbands' lives, take care of their husbands and children, plus deal with large and small finances and affairs. In fact, since the feudal society, the "boss lady economy" has always existed, not a new phenomenon, has always been the male outside, the female inside, the family finance and life details are all managed by women. This "lady boss economy" and culture seem to have endured for a long time before it will resonate with many people. Gu Jia has done the extreme, so my last article "Thirty Only: Isn't the Desperate Effort of Materialistic Desires Greasy?" It is said that Gu Jia is not an independent woman, she is a modern version of the ultimate version of the virtuous wife and mother. At the end of the TV series, she said that she had always been someone else's wife, someone else's mother, someone else's daughter, and now she was going to be herself.
Voltaire said: "What makes people tired is not the distant mountains, but a grain of sand in the shoes." "O woman, who can escape love, who can escape the family."
But in the era of the big heroine, where do men go? Where has the strength and spirit of a man gone?
Therefore, I will write about a man next, emphasizing the power of men, not only in society, in the economy, but also in the family, where there should be a realistic feeling of worrying about the country and the people, and there should also be a spirit of facing the future and asking how the world is better.
The man's name was Liang Ji. Why would I find him and write about him? First of all, I think that the era of the great heroine is coming, and we need another kind of big male protagonist, not a domineering president, not a hero Haojie, not a great man who has made meritorious achievements, but just a person who is born for nourishing people's spirit.
The literary master Nabokov read books by putting different books together and reading them at the same time. He would often place stacks of books at the head of his bed, mixed with new books, old books, novels, non-fiction, poems, and so on.
I did the same when I didn't know Nabokov. I once said at the last qin shuo circle of friends readers meeting that I read books is to put a book in the living room, bedroom, dining room, etc., and I will take it to read when I have time. When many books are talking about the same person, you are related to this person, you want to read this person's autobiography and so on, and further understand and understand him.
Recently I saw a book that said that when Liang Shuming was 24 years old, he was recruited to teach at Peking University with a secondary school degree. In another book, the phrase "not chaotic in the heart, not trapped in love, not afraid of the future, not reading the past" appears, this famous saying has a wide application scenario, in fact, it was originally Feng Zikai's evaluation of Liang Shuming.
Therefore, I especially wanted to know how this "last great Confucian of China" was cultivated and refined. Because I have children myself, I am always looking for ideas and methods to refine my core. So I'm always doing case studies.
Looking at the history of their family, there are a few points that really shocked me:
1. They are the descendants of Kublai Khan, and the family belongs to the Yuan Dynasty clan. The original surname was also Timur, and later because he lived in Henan, he changed his Han surname to Liang, because Henan was a Liang state during the Warring States period.
2. Liang Shuming's grandfather Liang Chengguang was the Zhizhou of Yongning in Shanxi, and Yongning was a military stronghold of Shaanxi and Jin, laying the foundation for the family's bookish atmosphere and soldier feelings. But then his grandfather died of overwork.
3. Liang Shuming's father, Liang Ji, was raised by his mother-in-law and birth mother. His mother-in-law was also a remarkable figure, and after her husband fell and the family fell, she took up the burden of supporting the family herself. She opened a private school at home, taught other children to make ends meet, and became a teacher for Liang Ji. They are all people who can afford to take care of the overall situation.
4. After Liang Jizhong was raised, he also served as a school teacher in the noble family of the capital. When he was 20 years old, he was favored by the family of an official eunuch and wanted to marry his daughter to him. He refused, he was a stubborn man.
Liang Ji's character, temperament, friendship, and lifestyle all deeply affected Liang Shuming.
1. After Liang Ji taught, his main work was charity, such as running a Salesian children's church, teaching in a crime correctional institution, and so on. Under the influence of his father, he also particularly liked to read military books, wrote to the Military Minister to provide military advice, and later supported the Penghu Reform Law. In the Chinese nation, there have always been people who are really worried about the country and the people. And it is still family-style inheritance, the real can't be fake, the fake can't be true. Therefore, Liang Shuming will take "Will the world be better" as a lifelong question and try his best to improve.
2. Liang Ji has generously helped his friend Peng Yizhong, a famous journalist in the press, to run a newspaper for many times. When he was a child, Liang Shuming was also influenced by Peng Yizhong and cared about the changes in the situation from an early age. Liang Shuming once said that he benefited from newspapers and magazines for self-study. The "Beijing Dialect Daily", "Enlightenment Pictorial" and "Zhonghua Bao" that Peng Yizhong ran or participated in are all sources of his knowledge and nutrition. He said, "The so-called self-study should be the upward self-improvement of a person's entire life, and it is important to have self-awareness in life." "Life should be camped upwards.
3. Liang Ji has an easy-going personality, and he feels that it is a matter of pride to be familiar with the people at the bottom, such as hawkers, coachmen, porters, etc. Compassion is also their common heart.
4. Liang Ji has a wide range of interests, loves to watch Peking Opera, and can even write scripts, which is full of love for the country and the expectation of social improvement. The main part of Liang Shuming's 10-year-old family education is to listen to his father talk about the play, and Liang Ji will teach the interesting fragments of the play to his children through stories.
How does Liang Ji raise children?
1, let the child know that the world is big, always emphasize the combination of East and West. Education is actually a process in which the common knowledge structure and the spirit cultivated by parents interact with each other and pass it on to the next generation.
At the age of 6, he asked his teacher to teach him to read the "Three Character Classic" and "Hundred Family Names", and later added the "Rhyme of the Earth" compiled by Zhang Shiying, which was a textbook for the ancients to learn about world geography. He wants his children to know about world affairs, care about the overall situation of the country, and open their eyes to the world. He did not let Liang Shuming read the Four Books and Five Classics. At the age of 7, he sent Liang Shuming to the Zhongxi Primary School. Beijing's first foreign school, which not only attaches importance to traditional Chinese culture, but also emphasizes that students learn English well.
2. Weave common memories to consolidate spiritual education.
9-year-old Liang Shuming lost a string of copper coins when he was playing in the yard, and he couldn't find it, which was very sad. The next day, when Liang Ji was cleaning, he found it, it turned out to be hanging on a peach tree branch, he did not return it to the child immediately, but gave a note to the child that wrote down the matter. He was not only a loving father in the traditional sense, but also a parent with a sense of equality and a democratic spirit, often educating himself through suggestion.
There are only a few things in a person's life that can impress others. Note that leaving such a life story is a story worth a lifetime of tasting and remembering.
3. Enlightened education.
The children of the Liang family do not have to follow the rules and regulations, do not even pay attention to the basic etiquette, have great autonomy, and are free to think and speak. The subject matter and content of their reading are not limited, and they can do it according to their own interests. If the father does not agree with the child's approach, he will never interfere with them, but will let the child know in other ways that he does not agree.
4. Life education.
Like the Jews, Liang Ji emphasized the participation of children in daily life, such as the purchase of some daily necessities and the handling of some family pieces. There are also many hygiene and health-related reminders and instructions. It can be said that he is very attentive and thinks of almost all aspects of education.
Without Liang Ji, there would be no Liang Shuming, how great is the significance of father.
Knowing that he was the one who was dying, he was especially kind to his children. Why is he the one who is dying, because he has always intended to awaken the world through his own death.
Three days before his 60th birthday, he committed suicide by casting a spell on Jingye Lake. Liang Ji's death is a protest and helplessness against the degradation of the inherent culture. Xu Zhimo said that Liang Ji's sacrifice was a conscious action made by a spiritual inspiration.
Liang Shuming believes that his father's suicide is not just a personal act, and in order to avoid people being unconscious of mistakes, he allows people and students to have an open discussion about this. His assessment of his father was: "Genius and wisdom are only ordinary, but he is a reformer with a superior spirit." ”
Chinese culture and the spirit of scholars, originally most of the Chinese men inherited all the way, but I don't know why, in modern real life, it seems that the application scenarios are getting less and less.
Who is really worried about the country and the people? Who really wants to ask," "Is this the world going to be good?" Who has a big mind and a big picture? Who wants to use their lives to work for philosophy, culture, spirit, science and technology?
Of course, there is still a spirit of entrepreneurship, they take risks, they innovate, they want to change the world. In today's complex world, in moments of contradiction and conflict, on the left, there must be a soft spirit of sincerity, goodness, mutual help, and lifelong persistence; on the right, there must be a strong spirit of boldness, courage, sacrifice, blood, and extremely high philosophy and wisdom.
Nietzsche said that you might as well be bold with life, because we always have to lose it. Ordinary and ordinary Song Xiaonu, the mainstay Gu Jia, the otherworldly Liang Ji, we can still extract the core of life from it after all, and we are in the struggle to resist and correct in the sublimation.
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