Many parents regard the Book of Fu Lei as the "Bible of Education." Fu Lei often begged his son in his letters not to be bothered by himself and to write back to himself more. But in fact, Fu Cong rarely replied to Fu Lei.
Fu Cong once said: "I am annoyed by these (family letters), and I have never looked at these things well." “
Fu Cong's good friend Liao Chong read the "Fu Lei Family Letter" and said, "How can such a father bear it!" ”
In 1908, Fu Lei was born into a landlord family in Nanhui County, Jiangsu Province, and in the environment of war, he was able to eat and clothe without worry.
When he was four years old, Fu Lei's father was framed by the local local squire and arrested and imprisoned, where he suffered tuberculosis. His mother went around outside to make some connections and managed to rescue her father, but he died shortly after he was released from prison.
The mother ran for days to save her father, and had no time to take care of the children in the family, Fu Lei's two younger brothers and a younger sister died of illness one after another, and only Fu Lei survived.
< Fu Lei >
After the death of her husband and three children, the mother pinned all her hopes on Fu Lei, longing for the only remaining children to get ahead as soon as possible. When Fu Lei was seven years old, his mother hired him a private school. While teaching, my mother was doing needlework on the side, but her eyes were monitoring Fu Lei's every move.
When Fu Lei was playing and not reading, his mother took a rope and tied Fu Lei to the leg of the table, and knelt down to confess his mistake to his deceased father's spirit card.
Once, Fu Lei accidentally fell asleep while studying homework and was found by his mother. The mother stuffed the candle head into the hole of the copper coin, lit it and attached it to Fu Lei's navel, and used wax oil to wake up the sleeping Fu Lei.
Fu Lei was burned and screamed, and the neighbor's wife was alarmed by Fu Lei's screams, ran to their house, and was frightened by the scene in front of her: "Young Grandmother, how can you be so cruel to the child, do you want to kill him?"
In order to punish Fu Lei, his mother also tried to throw him into the river, who could not swim, and Fu Lei pounced in the river and shouted for help, until he was about to die, and his mother fished him up.
In the most serious case, Fu Lei skipped school in junior high school, and his mother planned to kill him first and then hang himself. That day, the neighbors heard the fu family's cry and ran to stop it, saving Fu Lei and his mother. After that, Fu Lei never dared to skip school again.
Fu Lei was admitted to the Affiliated High School of Datong University in Shanghai. After entering the attached middle school, he met a friend with the same lineage as him, Lei Yuan, whose parents died since childhood and was lonely for many years.
Fu Lei did not know Lei Yuan, but after reading his article about his own life, he ran to Lei Yuan's dormitory, tearfully took Lei Yuan's hand and told him about his childhood.
Since then, the two have seen each other, and Fu Lei has moved his luggage to live with him. Growing up in a similar environment, the two quickly became confidants. But it didn't take long for Lei Yuan to see Fu Lei's temper, and the two would argue when they disagreed, and when Fu Lei quarreled excitedly, he would also drop the textbook on the ground, and the two often quarreled to the point of turning their faces.
When Fu Lei was studying at the Attached High School of Datong University in Shanghai, he participated in the progressive student movement, and the president ordered his arrest. When her mother heard the news, she rushed to the scene and forced Fu Lei to follow her home. Soon after, her mother sold her assets and sent Fu Lei to study in France.
While studying in France, Fu Lei met the beautiful French girl Madeleine, and he fell completely in love with Madeleine. By then he was already engaged to his cousin, Jumma-fu. For madeleine's sake, Fu Lei wrote to his mother and offered to retire from marriage. He handed the letter to his friend Liu Haisu and asked him to help him send it to his mother.
< Fu Lei studied in France to get acquainted with Liu Haisu >
Liu Haisu felt that a beautiful woman like Madeleine was prone to change her heart, and Fu Lei might soon be abandoned. He thought that if he sent the letter back now, it would most likely hurt Fu Lei.
Sure enough, within a few days, Fu Lei held a gun in his hand and rushed into Liu Haisu's house. He was trembling and his mouth was saying, "Madeleine doesn't want me anymore." ”
< Fu Lei > in France (1930).
At the same time as interacting with Fu Lei, Madeleine had several boyfriends, made Herdeline's abusive love broke Fu Lei's heart, and this loss of love made him want to commit suicide.
Liu Haisu persuaded him, and Fu Lei thought of his mother and his engaged cousin, and dispelled the idea of suicide.
In 1931, Fu Lei returned to Shanghai at the invitation of Liu Haisu to teach art history and French at the Shanghai Academy of Fine Arts, and served as the director of the school's office.
During Fu Lei's teaching period, Principal Liu Haisu took great pains to invite an art teacher from Beijing. Liu Haisu asked people to hang more than a dozen works painted by the teacher in the school corridor for everyone to enjoy.
The next day, Fu Lei and Liu Haisu entered the campus together, and as soon as they saw the paintings hanging in the corridor, they were angry, and he immediately ordered the workers to remove all the paintings on the wall. In front of the art teacher, Fu Lei scolded: "These paintings are too rigid, not creative, not qualified to exhibit here, remove!" ”
This made Liu Haisu on the side very embarrassed, and he kept apologizing to the new teacher, but he couldn't stop Fu Lei. The art teacher could not stay in school, and soon resigned and left.
In 1932, Fu Lei and Zhu Meifu married, he hated his wife's name too rustic, changed her name to "Zhu Meifu", and also gave his wife a French name "Margaret".
Shortly after the death of Fu Lei's mother, his son Fu Cong was born in the Paris Village in Shanghai.
When Fu Cong was five years old, Fu Lei was eating peanuts and rice next to him, and somehow suddenly in a bad mood, he picked up the small ceramic plate on the table and smashed it in fu Cong's direction. The plate smashed The bridge of Fu Cong's nose, the blood flowed non-stop, and Zhu Meifu was scared to cry.
Due to Fu Lei's status as an art critic, he had many excellent painters around him. He intended to train Fu Cong to draw, but Fu Cong just grabbed the pen and drew a few strokes randomly, and was not interested in painting. When Fu Cong was eight years old, Fu Lei's friend Lei Yuan, who was in school, gave Fu Cong an enlightenment teacher and discovered Fu Cong's musical talent, and Lei Yuan said to Fu Lei: "Fu Cong has a pair of musical ears. ”
This sentence made Fu Lei rarely smile. In order to train Fu Cong, Zhu Meifu sold the dowry to rent a piano for his son, and Fu Lei personally helped his son copy the staves. At the same time, Fu Cong also ushered in Fu Lei's more severe teachings.
< Zhu Meifu > with Fu Cong and Fu Min
When Fu Cong disobeyed, Fu Lei would tie him up in front of his house so that his neighbors could see him.
Fu Lei worked in the study upstairs, Fu Cong played the piano downstairs, and as soon as he heard the piano downstairs stop, Fu Lei banged with his cane. As soon as Fu Cong heard the sound of the cane ringing, his frightened little face turned white, and he immediately bounced up again.
Once, Fu Lei found that Fu Cong's sound of playing the piano was intermittent, quietly went upstairs, and found that Fu Cong was playing the piano while watching "Water Margin".
As soon as Fu Cong turned his head, he saw Fu Lei pull out the belt around his waist...
Fu Lei's translator friend Lou Shiyi lived in Fu Lei's house for a while. In it, he wrote:
"I saw him grab the child's hair and bang his little head against the wall, as if he were going to put the child to death at once. My mother was shaking her hands and did not dare to come to the rescue, so I had to interfere in internal affairs and snatch the child out of his hands. ”
In 1939, Fu Lei and Liu Haisu's sister-in-law chengjia liu met, this beautiful soprano singer immediately attracted Fu Lei's attention, and since then Fu Lei has begun to pursue chengjia liu wildly.
Fu Lei works during the day and frantically writes love letters to Chengjia Liu at night. He thought that ChengJialiu was the source of his inspiration, and once When Chengjialiu went on a business trip to Yunnan, Fu Lei was almost crazy, and he said to Zhu Meifu: "If I can't see Chengjialiu, I will use a pen to pierce my throat." ”
Zhu Meifu was silent for a while, then went to call Cheng Jialiu: "You come back soon, Old Fu is dying, he can't work without you." ”
< Fu Lei and Cheng jia liu >
When she has time, Zhu Meifu will also take the initiative to invite ChengJialiu to come to the house as a guest.
The love affair between Fu Lei and Cheng Jialiu was written into the novel by Zhang Ailing, "Duan Baoxiao Sending Flowers to the Louhui" is the story of the two, Zhang Ailing borrowed Duan Baolan's mouth and scolded Fu Lei: "He is such a neurotic person, how can you marry him?" ”
Shortly after the novel was published, Cheng Jialiu, fearing that his reputation would be ruined, quit the relationship and went to Hong Kong to marry.
Years later, Cheng Jialiu mentioned this matter to Fu Min (Fu Cong's younger brother): "Your father loves me very much, but your mother is too good, so good that in the end I had to leave." ”
Regarding Fu Lei's infidelity to feelings, Zhu Meifu later wrote in his family letter: "I can walk away, but I think about it again and again, and I think it is not so simple. I am gone, the child has to suffer, I should not be so willful, selfish, and sacrifice your happiness for a 'me'. I finally put up with it. ”
In 1948, Fu Lei's family moved to Kunming, Yunnan Province, and Gandhi was assassinated internationally, and Fu Lei did not eat for several days for this matter, and closed the door and did not see anyone.
With tears in her eyes, Zhu Meifu knocked on the door of the study and said, "Old Fu, don't do this, eat something!" ”
In Kunming, the fourteen-year-old Fu Cong also ushered in a period of rebellion, and Fu Lei rebelled, wandering around with nothing to do all day. Fu Lei simply ignored him, and after confessing to his old friends in Kunming, he left Fu Cong alone in Kunming, and he and Zhu Meifu and Fu Min returned to Shanghai.
When he was in middle school in Kunming, Fu Cong disobeyed the discipline of the instructor, skipped class all day to fall in love, play bridge, and was soon expelled. Fu Cong could only change schools, but every time he changed schools, it would not be long before the school authorities would expel Fu Cong for not doing his job.
It wasn't until Fu Cong was admitted to Yunnan University with his classmates and accidentally hit the exam that he gradually began to wake up.
During his college years, by chance, he accompanied his classmates in a concert at the choir, and Fu Cong received a letter from a plastered audience with a Long March medallion. The letter reads: I see in you the hope of a new China.
< Fu Cong >
Fu Cong was very touched, and at the age of seventeen, he felt that he could no longer live like before. With the help of his classmates, he raised the cost of the road and walked from Kunming to Shanghai alone for a month.
Fu Lei saw Fu Cong walking home and felt that his son had grown up, and he thought that Fu Cong had a strong backbone and could learn music well.
Since then, the relationship between Fu Lei and Fu Cong has not been as stiff as before.
In order to make up for the piano that he had left behind, Fu Cong practiced the piano for eight hours every day. In 1952, Fu Cong performed Beethoven's Fifth Piano Concerto at the Lyceum Theatre with the Shanghai Symphony Orchestra. At the age of 18, his first appearance on stage attracted the attention of the Shanghai Music Festival, and he was selected to participate in a piano competition in Romania in the summer of 1953.
On January 17, 1954, Fu Lei, Zhu Meifu, and Fu Min went to Shanghai North Railway Station to send Fu Cong to Beijing, the train was far away, and the family was still standing on the platform looking at Fu Cong's train.
Later, Fu Lei began to write letters to Fu Cong. The first family letter he wrote to Fu Cong was a letter of apology: "Child, I abused you, I will never be sorry for you, I will never be able to atone for this sin!" These thoughts never left my head for a whole day. ”
"Poor child, how come your childhood is so similar to mine?"
That year, Fu Lei was forty years old.
< Fu Lei and Fu Cong >
Since then, Fu Lei's letter to Fu Cong has written more details that Fu Cong himself has not noticed, such as:
Fu Cong went to someone else's house and took off his coat, he would forget to take off the silk scarf around his neck, fu Lei told him that he had to take the silk scarf and the coat together to the cloakroom;
Fu Cong often put his hand in the pocket of his jacket or in his trouser pocket, and Fu Lei thought it was not in line with Western etiquette, so he asked him not to insert his hand into his pocket;
Fu Cong would shake his body when he played the piano, and Fu Lei felt that this kind of action would affect the attention of the audience and make him quit the habit of shaking his head and shaking his head.
Similar "small problems", Fu Lei wrote a lot. In the "Book of Fu Lei's Family", Fu Lei wrote one hundred and seventy-seven letters to Fu Cong, about 350,000 words. Fu Cong's reply to Fu Lei was only six, and they were all similar:
He usually says he hasn't written in a long time, and then makes a "reasonable" excuse that he hasn't replied for a long time.
Like this: "Dear Mom and Dad, I haven't written to you for a long time, of course, my heart is always worried." ”
This made Fu Lei dissatisfied, and he wrote to his son: "We have always asked you for family letters, just like collecting debts. You should know more about your father's temper and don't humiliate him for the sake of writing letters, okay? ”
"The father doesn't ask you for anything, only asks you to write more letters, for the sake of your love for your father, can't you do it?"
Fu Cong felt sorry for his father, but he was powerless to separate: "I don't dare to write, I only write so few letters, as long as I say a word, a small feeling, it will cause my father to react like this." If I write a little more, it will be even worse, then I will not have to do anything, I will not have to practice the piano, and I will have to write letters all day. ”
In 1955, Fu Cong won the third prize in the Chopin International Piano Competition and the "Mazouga" Best Performance Award, which became famous in the world, and the Polish people were very surprised and very moved, they felt: "This is incredible, how can Chinese grasp Chopin's soul so deeply?" ”
Fu Lei and Zhu Meifu were very proud to learn of Fu Cong's achievements at home, and he praised Fu Cong in his letter to Fu Cong, and also asked him not to be complacent, but to be humble.
The following year, Fu Cong returned from abroad for the summer vacation, and he changed a lot and was much more confident than before. Fu Cong said a lot of things, and Fu Lei listened very carefully. The two talked about music and art to philosophy, and the father and son had endless topics.
At the end of the summer vacation, Fu Cong returned to Poland.
In 1957, Fu Cong returned to Beijing, because of the competition, he did not have time to return to Shanghai to see his father. Fu Lei missed Fu Cong very much and asked his friend Lou Shiyi to go to Beijing to see Fu Cong.
Lou Shiyi once saved Fu Cong from Fu Lei's hands, and Fu Cong was very happy to see him. The two talked for a long time, and out of trust, Fu Cong and Lou Shiyi talked about foreign politics and expressed their thoughts on the polish incident and the political situation in the Soviet Union.
Lou Shiyi was uneasy after listening to it. In the tense situation at home, he was worried that Fu Cong, like Fu Lei, would end up being criticized because of his "unobstructed mouth". He chatted with the leader and reported fu cong's situation.
Lou Shiyi originally just wanted them to care more about Fu Cong, but unexpectedly, the leader attached great importance to it, lou Shiyi's front foot just left, and the back foot called Fu Cong over.
Fu Cong was warned: "If you continue like this, I will transfer you back!" Tell you to go to the countryside to work! ”
Fu Cong returned to Poland, and soon after, he received orders to return home early from his studies. After returning to China, Fu Cong participated in the criticism conference and political education all day, and had no time to practice the piano at all.
After returning to Poland again, Fu Cong's first love in China secretly wrote him a letter asking him not to return to China. The letter made Fu Cong make a bold decision.
With the help of a British music teacher, he bought a plane ticket from Warsaw to London. He avoided the attention of Chinese students and quietly boarded a flight to Britain.
The news of Fu Cong's departure leaked out, and as soon as he got off the plane, he was surrounded by long-awaited reporters, but he did not say a word in the face of questions.
After arriving in the UK, because he did not have a British passport, Fu Cong could not participate in many performances, coupled with the deduction of his agent, fu Cong was unable to solve the problem of food and clothing for a long time.
< Fu Cong > in England
Foreign journalists promised Fu that as long as he could accept special interviews and talk about domestic affairs, Fu Cong would immediately get a fortune. Fu Cong knew very well that what they wanted to hear was some information that was not good for the motherland, and out of the defense of the motherland, Fu Cong refused their interview
Because he did not have British citizenship, he could not participate in the performance, and it was difficult to survive. In 1964, Fu Cong reluctantly became a British citizen.
Beginning on August 30, 1966, Fu Lei suffered several days of raids and criticisms.
On the night of September 2, Fu Lei and Zhu Meifu tore two strips of cloth from the sheets of cloth, laid a thick quilt on the ground, and placed them on the stool so that the sound of the square stool falling down woke up the neighbors downstairs.
The two left a will, writing in the letter to set aside 600 yuan for the nanny Zhou Judi, "She is a working person, a lonely life, we do not want her to suffer for no reason." ”
On September 3, Fu Lei committed suicide by drinking poison, and Zhu Meifu placed him on the sofa and hung him on the back beam.
Two months later, Fu Cong learned from a friend that his parents had committed suicide. He didn't practice that night and wandered the streets of London with a bottle of wine.
Years later, Fu Cong returned to Beijing to perform, and at night he sat alone in the hotel watching TV, and when he saw a lost child looking for his father on the street like a headless fly, the middle-aged Fu Cong suddenly couldn't help but cry.
A year before Fu Lei's death, Fu Cong passed through Hong Kong, and at that time he had not contacted his family for seven years, so he quickly made a long-distance phone call to his family. That day was a phone call answered by Zhu Meifu, and Fu Cong only shouted "Mother" and choked up and could not speak.
Fu Lei wrote about the call in his letter: "The fly in the ointment is that you didn't call me on that call, probably you were too nervous, of course, not to argue for rules, but to hear a little 'Daddy' as if there was a big loss." ”
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Author | Song Juhan (Fork Little Knowledge Planet Student)