On International Women's Day 2020, the fashion magazine Girls, Girls, Girls produced a short film called "Be A Lady They Said", which explains from God's perspective the requirements of women in today's society.
Eat less, lose weight, don't be too fat, don't be too thin, don't talk too much, don't complain, be pure, be sexy, wear makeup, be natural, don't wear too little, don't be raped, don't laugh at strangers, don't be too emotional, be a woman's job, be a good wife, be a good mother...
As soon as the short film was released, it attracted a lot of attention, and the contradictory lines pointed directly to society's manipulation of women - to survive according to their standards, not to be themselves. And "in the patriarchal society, women should not be themselves, how should they be themselves" is exactly the question that the movie "Jin Zhiying born in 82 years" wants to discuss.
[Anti-sexism] Affirmative Action Short: Be A Lady, They said! Sentences of Curse Heart @ Europe and America IN Traces_Bilibili _bilibili
In the family, it is the duty of women to teach their children
Born in 82, Jin Zhiying is a full-time housewife, her husband is gentle and considerate and earns more money, her daughter is smart and cute and does not make trouble, a family of three lives in Seoul, Kim Ji-young does not have to worry about material life, nor does she have to face the delicate mother-in-law relationship every day, which should be an enviable happy life! But this is not the case.
Heavy housework makes Jin Zhiying work all year round, all day round around her husband and daughter, every New Year's Festival, she must play a good daughter-in-law who is obedient, serving her in-laws while also taking care of her sister's family returning from her in-laws' house. Only at her mother's house can Kim Ji-young rest in peace for a while.
Although South Korea introduced the educational concept of "equality between men and women" after World War II and formulated a relatively complete policy and plan for women's education in the mid-1990s, the idea of male superiority and inferiority is still deeply rooted.
Jin Zhiying's mother learned well from an early age, but had to give up her studies for her brother; Kim, who is highly educated and has a good job, also had to quit her job to take care of her family after her daughter was born. After the daughter was a little older, Jin Zhiying and her husband discussed and decided to return to the workplace, but the mother-in-law sternly accused: "You are too much, my son's future is bright, how can you let him take the child at home?" ”
It is an eternal "truth" that women should sacrifice themselves for their fathers, brothers, husbands, and descendants. The women behind successful men are called great by modern society, and "great" has become a siege for women - whether your father, brother, husband, and offspring are successful or not, you have to give up "self" for them. The many possibilities of women being born as human beings are suppressed little by little, and finally condensed in a cement box of 100 square meters, because this is their ultimate destination, it is their duty to teach their husbands and children, and it is their dereliction of duty to go out and work hard regardless of their families.
As a result, Jin Zhiying kept his "duty" and gradually lost himself in the "peaceful life of a housewife".
In the workplace, the womb is a thunder that can explode at any time
After Jin Zhiying, a graduate of the Department of Chinese Literature, successfully entered the publicity company, her work ability was affirmed, but she did not have the opportunity to be promoted, but the male colleagues who were slightly inferior were promoted first. Kim's female superiors said that female employees should get married and take maternity leave, which is harmful to the company's 5-year plan.
Women's natural fertility has become a tool used by the patriarchal society to reverse suppression and control, making it difficult for women to get the same opportunities as men in the workplace. The young Jin Zhiying once vowed that even if he got married and had children, he would have the confidence to work well. But obviously, everything is far from simple.
If Jin Zhiying had not resigned after becoming pregnant, would the workplace have been better for her? Not.
In the 2013 domestic drama "Children Are Difficult to Raise", the workplace elite played by Song Jia not only lost the opportunity to promote to the top after giving birth to a child, but also was demoted to a grassroots employee who writes reports every day.
In modern East Asian countries dominated by Confucianism, women must not only keep the duty of their husbands and godsons, but also strive to avoid being eliminated by society, and it is even more difficult to realize self-worth in their careers. Just like Jin Zhiying's female superior, although she is a manager, she sacrifices herself. She frankly admits that she is not a good wife, nor a good daughter, nor a good mother, although she has a place in the management of the company, she is still constantly ridiculed by male leaders and colleagues.
The question of how to balance family and career will always only be raised for women, and women's pursuit of self-worth will always be ranked after the husband and son. Procreation is a right, but it is portrayed as a woman's obligation, what? Are you Dink? Do you hate kids? I'm sorry, but it's a matter of course for a woman to have a child, and if she doesn't have a child, she is not a woman, but a defective product that has lost its motherhood. Rest assured, with children your ideas will change. Have you compromised? That's right, do a good job of helping people, and leave the work of managing society to men!
Jin Zhiying, why are you depressed?
Kim Ji-young, who lost her ideals in the tedious chores, suffered from severe depression. Although there is nothing unusual in her daily life, Jin Zhiying is always unhappy, and at the critical point of the pressure outbreak, she will become another person to talk to the people around her.
In the Douban discussion section of the film, a female speaker attributed Kim's depression to "temperament and dissatisfaction."
It is hard to imagine that the greatest malice and incomprehension towards women comes from women.
Yes, Jin Zhiying does not have to worry about her livelihood, in the face of delicate mother-in-law relationship, her husband is sympathetic and never makes peace with thin mud, but can these become the reason for Jin Zhiying's "contentment"?
According to a 2012 survey by the Korea Disease Headquarters, women experience depression 1.8 times more often than men in South Korea, and they are left with double pressures from family and society.
Jin Zhiying, who resigned as a housewife, is often ridiculed as a "mother worm" by people in the workplace, and when trying to go out to work, she is reprimanded by her mother-in-law, and Jin Zhiying loses the right to choose life and goes farther and farther in the proposition of "herself". She told the psychiatrist: "I think it is good to live like this, as a person's mother, as a person's wife, sometimes I feel happy, but sometimes, I feel trapped somewhere." 」 ”
The inability to control her own life is the biggest reason for Jin Zhiying's depression, and the sense of loss of control comes from society's conventional requirements for women - taking care of children, being considerate of her husband, and honoring her in-laws.
Under the inertia of patriarchal thinking, it is difficult for women to become "themselves", they are regarded as appendages of men, and many women suffer without knowing it. Chizuru Ueno wrote in the book Misogyny:
Women who internalize the values of men's society into their own values will actively adapt to the sequence of men and expect to get the distribution of wealth through men. How sad it is that these women who are willing to become objectified by men will even help men suppress women.
"Little Hermione" Emma Watsont mentioned in her speech at the United Nations that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities, men can be vulnerable and sensitive, women can be strong and independent, and gender should not become a dogma that defines character. But under the extreme understanding of many people, women's claim for personal rights has become a despicable means for them to compete with men for social resources.
Before the release of the movie "Kim Ji-young born in 1982", it was heavily boycotted by South Korean men, and the film's main actors also suffered from online violence, and after the film was released, South Korean male audiences called it "a carnival of persecutory paranoia". Rao is so, the film still achieved excellent box office results in South Korea, because Kim Ji-young is not an individual, but a true portrayal of millions of women in South Korea and even Asia.
It has to be said that the awakening of women has filled men who are accustomed to being on the top with a sense of crisis, and they are afraid that women's self-consciousness will take away the glory they have. However, where do men who are so afraid of women's awakening come from with the confidence that they can support the benign operation of society? Here to borrow netizen comments -
Men should not be afraid of women standing up, women standing up does not mean that men will fall, the world is big enough to stand under two groups of people.
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