This article is original by Tuanzi Ma parenting, welcome personal comments and sharing
In life, compared with the age-old proposition of "mother-in-law relationship", there is also a topic that has always been entangled with children, that is: "Who are grandma and grandma kissing with"?
It is often said that the child is the dog of the grandmother's family, there is food to eat, there is no food to go; some people say that "the blood relationship is greater than the sky, and the grandmother and the grandson are the direct blood relationship", so the grandmother is closer to the child.
The elderly give pressure money, and the grandson and the grandson are treated differently, causing contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
As for the question of who is closer to the child, Rice has had a conflict with her mother-in-law because of this matter, so that now Rice has mustard in her heart.
During this year's Spring Festival, rice took her son back to her mother-in-law's house, and the eldest sister also took her own children back to her mother's house, according to the custom, the mother-in-law will send red envelopes to the children, because the money is wrapped in red envelopes, so how much each child gives, only the mother-in-law knows.
But when the children were playing, the two children somehow took out the money in the red packet, and the rice looked at the thick money in the hands of the children in the eldest sister, but the red envelopes of the children in their own families were thin, and instantly understood that the mother-in-law was engaged in "differential treatment".
In this regard, the mother-in-law explained that it was because the conditions in the eldest sister's home were not good, but the rice was still very angry, which was obviously more intimate with the grandson and regarded the grandson as an outsider.
Grandma or Grandma who is closer to the child? The real ranking proves that many people are thinking wrong
Grandma and grandma who are the closest to the child? The scientific ranking goes like this:
Foreign researchers have done a survey of some "lost families" and found that when there are children in the family who die prematurely, the most sad and sad among the elderly is the grandmother, followed by the grandmother and the grandfather, and the least sad is the grandfather.
From this survey, we can find that in fact, among grandparents and grandparents, grandma is the closest to the child, and indeed in many people's hearts, there is a grandmother who makes her unforgettable.
Like Tuanzi Mama now from time to time will recall the days in her childhood at her grandmother's house, because her grandmother's house is close to school, so she will go to her grandmother's house at noon and after school at night, and her grandmother cooks very delicious, and this taste cannot be forgotten to this day.
And my grandmother's care and care for myself, every bit of my life is unforgettable, so now that I am growing up, compared with my grandmother, I still interact with my grandmother the most.
Many people are very surprised by this result, after all, in the eyes of many people, it seems that the grandmother is closer to the child, and from the perspective of blood relations, it should be the grandparents who are closer to the child.
So why is Grandma closer to her children? The evolution concludes that this is due to differences in parental identity. Because grandma will be 100% sure that the child is born to the daughter, this is a very direct blood relationship, which will make grandma love the child more.
In addition, grandma will generally be more concerned about the daughter, see the daughter's pregnancy of the various discomfort is also very painful, so from pregnancy to the birth of the child, grandma will also love the child very much in her heart.
Compared with grandma, grandpa and grandma do not have this advantage. Therefore, to a certain extent, out of consideration for the child's blood, it is naturally impossible to pay sincerely to the child.
In fact, this theory also applies to parents. Just like a newborn child, to be honest, it is really difficult to see who looks like, but any intelligent person will say that the child looks like a father, which is undoubtedly a "reassuring pill" for men.
As for why Grandpa and Grandpa are ranked last, it is also because Grandma and Grandma are women with a "motherly" nature, and they are more likely than men to integrate into strange children.
Who is closer to the child is influenced by other factors
Although in terms of ranking, grandma is the closest to the baby, but there is no absolute in the world, and the closeness between people and people will also be affected by many factors.
For example, at the most critical time of children's brain development, like the first three years, the way the child's brain is connected and the angle of looking at things will be affected by the nurturer, and in the first 3 years of the child and the "attachment relationship" established by the parenting, the child will trust, rely on and be close to this person.
Another example is that there are multiple children in a family. Especially the grandmother herself also has to take the grandchildren, can not take care of the grandchildren, this time the child will naturally be more in the grandmother's home, whether it is psychological or distance, natural children and grandparents are closer.
Tuanzi Mama wants to say:
In fact, whether it is a grandmother or a grandparent, anyone who truly loves the child, the child will return, so as long as the old man is good to the child, there is no need to let the child distinguish between the "who is closer to himself".
Today's topic: In your family, is the grandmother or the grandmother closer to the child?