Text/Coriander
It is said that women are half the sky, but in reality, discrimination and unfair treatment of women have always existed.
Mom was just a traditional woman, she hadn't gone far in her life, she hadn't read many books, but her kindness and wisdom were far beyond my reach.
When we were young, my mother was always fighting. She not only took care of the family, but also used her diligence and wisdom to lead the whole family to the road of Ben Xiaokang.
She only gave birth to our sisters, which was very despicable in the countryside at that time. But parents don't care, they value our health and nurturing us more.
However, because we are all girls, our mother is more strict with our education, and she even asks us to be better than boys.
She said that as a woman, no matter how difficult it is, she must do four things well, and only by doing these four things well can people look up to them.
★ Own the money
Mom said that women themselves must have money. Only with money in hand can a woman's survival be confident.
There is a saying that "no money is difficult to defeat a hero."
There is also a saying: having money can make ghosts grind.
These are very realistic things. With money, people want to do anything, so that they will not shrink their hands and feet, and they can let go and fight.
Being a woman is the same. Whether the money is earned by herself or given by her husband, women must take the money into their own hands or have full control.
Money is one of a woman's undertones, and there is no doubt about it.
★ Own a career
Career does not simply refer to going to work. Because the scope of a career is much more than just a job.
Going to work is a kind of career, and freelancing is also a kind of career.
Either way, women must have a career that can earn money and can make their spirit and wisdom.
When a woman has a career, she has the courage and confidence to be independent. Many times, a woman is looked down upon by men because she does not have her own career and does not have the ability to earn money.
If women have a career as a base, they will not be afraid of men and the eyes of the world.
★ Have an independent personality
What does a person rely on to survive? Mom said, rely on independent personality.
You can have no money, you can have no career, but you can't live without your own independent personality. Because those things are based on personality.
If a person does not have an independent personality, he will be as weak as a silk flower. If a person is weak, he will be bullied. This is what people recognize in common.
If men are weak and weak, they will be looked down upon, let alone women.
Therefore, if you want to stand in this world, women should have an independent personality.
Or, this independent personality, we call it "backbone." Only those who have backbone can stand tall in heaven and earth and live out their own characteristics.
★ Has a separate space
After a woman gets married, she is prone to losing herself. This is common to many women.
Mom said that after a woman gets married, she takes the family as the center and centers, which is understandable. But no matter how busy and tired, women also need to leave an independent space for themselves.
This space does not have to have a real environment, and sometimes, a virtual space is also possible. This is sometimes difficult to say, but no matter how difficult it is, we must strive to do it.
Why? Because women also need a place of emotional release, or independent thinking. This place, or a realistic environment, or an hour of free time of your own, is all right.
Mom said her separate space is half an hour to an hour before going to bed every night. We were all asleep, it was quiet all around, and she actually wanted to sleep, tired, but she was reluctant because her brain needed an empty and free. So, for a short period of time, she would sit quietly by herself, or hold a cup of tea and go to the door for a while.
At that time, it was dark everywhere, there were no lights, no one, only oneself talking to the soul. That's enough, she says.
With this half-hour or one-hour solitude, many unhappy and unpleasant things during the day will be eliminated. Otherwise, life is so bitter and tiring, how can people maintain physical and mental health?
Now that I think about it, my mother's words are deeply rooted in the philosophy of life. In my growing years of life, I often remembered my mother's words and tried to do what she said. In fact, there is only one purpose, that is, to be the best version of yourself and to be a person who is not despised.