Recently, the epidemic situation has made a comeback everywhere, and some confusing behaviors have followed.
You must have brushed up on such a short video. At the scene of nucleic acid testing, a child stood in front of the epidemic prevention personnel and danced the most popular gesture dance at the moment. bgm is sensational music: "Listen to me say thank you..."
Parents stand in the back and slam at their children.
And those "big whites" who are taking nucleic acid samples have to stop what they are doing and watch the dance.
I don't know when it began, and the atmosphere of dancing for the great white became popular.
For example, in the testing team, a child walked up to the big white and danced directly. And the mother who was still holding the baby in line behind her could only wait helplessly in the cold wind.
There are also times when epidemic prevention workers come to the door for testing. As soon as the door is opened, the children are already standing there waiting for them, and then they dance and compare hearts.
What can the whites do? After watching, a dance is three or four minutes, and it can do a few nucleic acids. Don't look, and you are afraid of hurting your child's heart.
Therefore, most epidemic prevention workers can only stand where they are and watch the whole process with embarrassment.
How did this ethos come about? In the early days of the fight against the epidemic, There was Mengwa who understood the hard work of Dabai, so she came up with a way to dance and make Dabai laugh.
The original intention is indeed good. The whites will also applaud the children cooperatively at the beginning. Just one, two, three... More and more people are following suit, and things are gradually changing.
Some children, one person jumping in front, followed by several parents to shoot. Moving the mirror and walking position are professional.
In fact, there are many examples such as these.
Did you find it? Dancing to the Great White has increasingly become a formalistic show-off.
It is the self-touching of some parents, it is just a piece of material for them to send short videos and circles of friends, and the careful thinking of these parents is to show off their children.
For example, is my baby very caring? How well did my kids dance? Do you think it's excellent? Come on, give me a thumbs up, praise me
To put it bluntly, is this really a thank you for the great white? Some people just use the big white and the child as a cover to satisfy their own vanity, as to whether the big white will really be moved, whether it will increase their related work burden, whether the child will be embarrassed, this is not important.
Finally, there are front-line staff who really can't stand it and come out to stop it:
"Children are good children, but can parents do something serious?"
"The original intention is very good, but we do have a lot of tasks and time is very tight."
Some state media have also begun to speak out for the whites.
Such a trend, it is really time to stop.
#01
Children are not toys at your disposal
Mr. Lao She once said: "Modern couples, teaching three or four-year-old children to read, Kelai performs a bit, using children as playthings, and forgetting that children's physical and mental education is very slow, can not be encouraged." ”
Many people should have had a similar experience when they were suddenly asked by their mother to perform a show in front of a friend or relative, whether you like it or not, whether you feel helpless or not, she wants you to perform a show to make her face grow.
According to a survey of primary and secondary school students, 89% of children said they were reluctant when asked to perform in front of relatives and friends, 3 students said that it was okay to perform their own best programs, and only 1 student was very happy to perform.
Many parents lack the perspective of their children to think about problems, can not see their inferiority and pitiful struggle, and can not see the fear of children standing in the giant forest of strangers.
Singing and dancing in front of others may be simple, but for children, it is a test of strength and courage.
When you let him perform in front of everyone, regardless of the child's wishes, do you know how much courage he has to use to overcome his shyness?
#02
Put away the vanity of "showing off and comparing"
In "Mars Intelligence Agency", there is an issue that "children who are forced to perform in front of their parents, how they grow up." Xue Zhiqian, Qian Feng, Yang Di and other guests present, without exception, have had similar experiences. Qian Feng even said that the father's behavior of forcing his children to perform the program has always affected him until he grows up.
Finally, the host Wang Han pointed out the reason why his parents did this - in order to show off, give themselves a long face.
Most parents, not to prove how good their children are, but to prove how successful their education is.
But we must know that parents let their children perform programs in front of everyone out of the psychology of comparison, which will make children extremely bored and even affect the parent-child relationship.
Steve. Landsberg said: Human beings sometimes regard the vanity of overcoming their opponents as more important than seeking the truth, so they are always busy comparing and competing.
You only think about your own face, do not care whether it is harmful to the growth of the child, and use the child as a capital to show off, which is likely to lead to their uneasiness, anxiety, and even depression.
Everyone wants to be praised and encouraged to fulfill their sense of self-fulfillment. But if the child is always passively doing something he doesn't like, it is difficult to be perfect. Over time, you will feel trepidation, grievance, and a strong sense of frustration in your heart.
We want our children to become better, but we ignore that what needs to change most is ourselves, not the children's choices.
#03
Don't let the Chinese show doll ruin more children
Trump's granddaughter once sang the Chinese song "Jasmine" and recited the "Three Character Classic" and Tang poems in front of the crowd. Netizens have lamented that children with a cow background can't escape the strange circle of the performance program!
Perhaps many times, we can't avoid this scene, so let's help the child correct the mentality and avoid harm.
#1
Respect your child's wishes
For public performances, children have the right to choose, and as parents, all we have to do is respect. If you can't respect your children, education is equal to zero.
Give attention and support, encourage the child to try, if he eventually refuses, parents should understand, can not blindly criticize. Usually in the mobile phone deliberately save some children to show the talent of the video, if necessary, to show everyone, can also prove the strength of the child. Such a child who has carefully maintained his self-esteem and self-confidence must grow up happily.
#2
Stay away from negative labels
Growing up, we all had a common enemy called "someone else's child." Parents show too much attention and praise to other people's children, which can easily trigger their children's inferiority and antipathy towards others.
Shu Tiandan said: Educating children is like raising flowers, carefully watering, fertilizing, and caring for them, in order to succeed.
We should always give our children a kind of strength, telling him "you can", "I accept you, willing to work with you". Let him know that his parents have always recognized and trusted him.
#3
Let your child be the best version of themselves
Many children are often praised, they can't stand to be denied, and when one day their skills are inferior, it is easy to immerse themselves in failure and can't extricate themselves. Let children understand that a person's value and ability are not reflected in the envy and praise of others.
Being able to chase your dreams without hesitation, in the process, you have become the best version of yourself. Effort is the best investment in life, only by forcing yourself, it is possible to tear up. And the sense of accomplishment that hard work brings to children is the highest level of happiness.
Sukhomlinsky said: Education is not the outdiscredulous orders of the elders and the obedience of the younger generations, but the tense and complex common spiritual activities in which the elders and the younger generations participate.
Every child has a talent he can perform, and the question is how we provide adequate conditions and proper guidance for their performance and development. Don't let the Chinese show off, ruin more children!
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