After graduating in June, Nanjing female college student Li Mou went to Xishuangbanna, Yunnan Province, in July, and subsequently disappeared.
She was found, but alas... Too late.
On August 4, Menghai police issued a notice saying her body was found on August 3. According to the investigation, her boyfriend Hong Mou gathered two brothers, lured her to the suburban mountains and forests of a small county in Yunnan, and killed and buried the body...
Really, it's too fierce.
(Source: Weibo)
As soon as the truth came out, there were a lot of comments like "how the last suspect in this kind of case is not a husband or a boyfriend" under the news, indeed, it has not been long since Xu Mouli killed his wife Lai in Hangzhou.
In the past month, I have seen too many cases of murder and domestic violence by partners, just like the virus:
The image is taken from Weibo
After these things happen, many girls become a little afraid of men and want to keep their distance, and some girls may also worry about themselves or their sisters in love, after all, once it happens, it may never be too late.
So, if in love, how do we identify potential "murderers"?
(Source: Monster Administrator)
First, the murder of a spouse or partner is one of the most serious forms of intimate partner violence (IPV), a type of domestic violence that is often accompanied by other forms of violence control.
Therefore, for the vast majority of women, the most fundamental thing is to prevent domestic violence.
People with the following characteristics have a greater risk of domestic violence [1-4], but not people with these characteristics have a tendency to be violent, and please do not misunderstand:
1. There has been violence
He has abused his partner, bullied his classmates in school, attacked strangers, and abused animals.
For example, in the "Jiang Ge Case", Chen Shifeng, the murderer who was originally intended to be a domestic abusive girlfriend, killed Jiang Ge, who protected his friend.
In addition to the girlfriend involved in the case said that he would punch and kick, the ex-girlfriend also said that he would kick his stomach when he clashed, and his classmates at the school said that he had been violent before.
(Source: XinhuaNet)
2. Become good friends with violent people during campus time [5,6]
When you become friends with violent people at a young age, in addition to being affected by the violent behavior of your friends, it may also be that people with violent tendencies like to choose friends with similar characteristics.
3. Abused or witnessed domestic violence in childhood, and parents have antisocial behavior [7,8]
Experiencing domestic violence in childhood may make children mistakenly believe that violence can be used to communicate or solve problems between family members; it may also affect children's mental health, making it difficult for them to regulate their emotions, and even developing aggressive behavior.
Parents' antisocial behavior may also have a subtle impact on the child, so that the child has a violent tendency.
But this is by no means to say that growing up in such a family is necessarily violent. If you are worried, you can ask his views on domestic violence when chatting with your partner, if the other party thinks that "beating the wife" and "hitting the child" does not matter, or even secretly reveals that "there is a reason for the incident", then you must be vigilant.
4. Lack of conscience
Lack of remorse and self-blame, hurting others is often indifferent or rationalizes their own behavior.
Disloyal, repeatedly lying, often cheating on others for their own benefit or pleasure.
Attitudes accept violence and gender inequality.
Always irresponsible, such as not being able to stick to or stabilize work, academic performance below the ability level, disregarding rules, not being able to restrain oneself even for therapeutic purposes (e.g., exercising, dieting), having no goals in personal and professional life, and not assuming maintenance responsibilities.
For example, in the case of a pregnant woman in China and a cliff fall in Thailand, the man is unemployed and addicted to gambling.
In the Shanghai wife-killing refrigerator hiding corpse case, the murderer Zhu Xiaodong always changed his girlfriend and frequently cheated.
(Source: Red Star News, The Paper)
5. Low extraversion
Lack of enthusiasm for life, no hobbies. If you don't care or trust your friends or family, you will take the initiative to alienate your relatives and friends.
6. Self-centered, lack of empathy, extremism
Low tolerance or understanding of different perspectives and lifestyles, and high control.
For example, when watching movies, short films, and news, even if there are more touching clips, these people are almost untouched.
There is no empathy for the unfortunate who are not completely aligned with or flawed in their own values.
There is no patience for the weak, for crying young children, for small animals.
Be extremely nice to you when you are in love, even if you don't have a deep relationship.
For example, a woman in Henan who was paraplegic due to jumping off a building by domestic violence once said that her husband was very considerate to her before marriage, and "there is no sign of hurting me."
(Image source: Whirlpool Video)
But in fact, "the phone did not answer and ran downstairs to the woman's side, staying until the early morning", has revealed a strong paranoia. This persistence in "trying" to move the other person in their own way is completely based on their own needs and does not really consider the other party.
7. Substance or alcohol abuse,
People who drink regularly and begin to have this habit at a younger age may be unable to control their emotions after drinking and commit domestic violence, and people who use drugs may be more likely to engage in domestic violence [9,10].
Many of the murders of couples actually have traces before the crime.
Many people think that domestic violence is punching and kicking, but in fact, it is not more than that.
Domestic violence can generally be divided into 4 main categories: emotional abuse, economic abuse, physical abuse and sexual abuse.
Let's start with emotional abuse.
He will always criticize or insult you and will even belittle you in front of others.
He is always critical of your family or friends and/or makes it difficult for you to meet them alone or talk to them.
He often checks your phone call logs, chat history, and emails.
Your needs are not valued or ignored.
You don't have the choice to really make decisions, and it's often his say in your relationship.
He has a lot of mood swings and is prone to tantrums, and you need to take the time to think about his mood and feel like walking on thin ice.
The other party is very suspicious and jealous, and often accuses you of having an affair.
Source: Stand Cool Helo
*The content of this article is a popularization of health knowledge and cannot be used as a specific diagnosis and treatment recommendation, nor is it a substitute for face-to-face consultation by a practicing physician, for reference only.
*The copyright of this article belongs to Tencent Medical Code, unauthorized media reprinting is prohibited, and illegal reprinting will be investigated for legal responsibility according to law. Individuals are welcome to forward to the circle of friends.
* Welcome to WeChat search and pay attention to the public account "Tencent Medical Code" to get more health science knowledge.