It has been 5 days since Shi Hang was exposed to sexually harassing many women.
After reading the evidence presented by both sides, I tossed and turned until midnight and still got up to code. Ben had just finished writing in the morning, and brushed the suicide accusation of one of the victims, Xiao Mo, and his sleepiness was once again driven away by anger, and he wanted to say a lot more.
I paid attention to the incident at the end of April, and out of the work ethic of the media, I patiently waited for the bullets to fly.
Source|Weibo @The Paper
Now the bullet has landed, but the gesture is absurd and a new realm.
The sexual harassment suspect even "generously" revealed his chat records with the victimized women. I think you have all seen it, and I will not repeat it to the effect that "there have been acts, but they are all voluntary." ”
Highlight words - "different levels of interaction".
In short, the illegal ones are quietly legalized in an intimate relationship: they are all "ex".
Source|Weibo @Parrot Shihang
...... What sin have I committed to make me feel this daddy confidence?
Have written recommendations for "Fang Siqi's First Love Paradise", but began to dress up in the obscure area of sexual consent?
It's not appropriate, Teacher Shi, not only does it not fit your appearance, but also does not fit your identity as a cultural person who has worked hard to manage.
I have to admit that this trick is really high. If you send a lawyer's letter ambiguously, with the eyes of contemporary netizens who have seen too much, it is equivalent to confirming the fact of sexual harassment.
However, such a move is anti-customer-oriented, and the comments immediately become fifty-fifty points.
It's just that this trick is too high, so high that it pokes my lung tube.
Having written so many articles for women, I talk about structural dilemmas all the time, but in fact, most events can tell right from wrong even if I don't dissect this structure—all because the pain of the weak is clear and painful.
But the greatest horror of structural dilemmas lies here: not intuitive wounds, but dull pains.
Violent men in barbecue restaurants are really terrifying, but among the injuries caused to women, this is probably the clearest and most reactionable one.
The more terrifying, universal, and difficult to find is often Shi Hang's.
His violent hands are not dirty.
Just take advantage of the traps that this patriarchal system places on women.
It will be possible for the girl to take the bait "voluntarily" and "without resistance".
Shi Hang knew the fact that they collectively loaded garlic.
Under the sexual behavior of the powerful, women who are absolutely vulnerable have no means.
往往yes also means no。
It's not hard to understand.
Power means silent oppression and obedience.
In an unequal power relationship, the no that symbolizes resistance must be no.
But yes, which symbolizes obedience, is not necessarily yes out of intention.
If you don't understand, substitute for your "voluntary overtime" during the May Day holiday.
Whether this "voluntariness" of active check-in comes from the boss's power to hold your survival capital, or from your inner love for work.
But it's easy to understand in the workplace.
On sexual matters, but it began to be controversial.
In the end, the question is that "the job really can't be lost, but this intimate act, if you don't want to do it, you can naturally not do it." ”
In other words, many people do not understand where the deterrent power of this "power" in the process of sexual behavior of the superior is embodied.
Especially like Shi Hang and these girls (according to Xiao Mo's statement, there are even hundreds), a few who have a working relationship with Shi, everyone can still give some understanding, but most of them have no direct interest, or Pingshui met, or Teacher Shi took the initiative to meet online, which made some people wonder:
Think he is disgusting, bluntly refuse and it's over, he is a public figure, can he kill your door without skin?
Therefore, in order to explain the deterrence of this "right", another set of victim guilt statements has been extended, that is, "If you are not willing to obey, then it must be your own intention to him." ”
The commonness of this set of rhetoric has been shown from the Wu Moufan case to the Liu Qiangdong case.
But I'm not in a hurry to refute it.
Because of the theory alone, this set of rhetoric is not entirely wrong.
Many victimized girls have expressed their personality cult for Shi Hang (former) to varying degrees when describing their experiences.
WZ called Shi Hang a "big man" and felt "honored" and "seen" by his invitation to the room, and Xiao Mo also expressed "flattering" at Shi Hang's greasy speech.
These strong pressures are uncomfortable with Shi Hangwei, and take the initiative to whitewash him with the aura of celebrity, and then blame themselves for their "not funny" mind, which is precisely behind the girls' needs for Shi Hang.
They wanted to get to know this famous literati, who symbolized the authority of theater.
They want to use this person to have a deeper relationship with the things they love.
They were also afraid, afraid that if they tore their faces, "he would speak up before me, and in our common circle, he would understate two or three sentences and mold me into a 'Wen Qingmi' with a bad brain."
I'm afraid that from this, "those bigwigs who share the same interests and feelings with him will really quickly stay away from me." ”
Yes, they have intentions, and they do not want to be expelled from this circle.
But just like those who love to watch talk shows want to know Li Sheng, and those who love to watch "Crazy" want to be at the same table as Zhang Songwen, is there anything wrong with this attempt to Shi Hang because of artistic interest?
It's a bit insulting to Li Sheng and Zhang Songwen, but the truth makes sense.
Who doesn't have a pilgrimage mentality of love.
Who could have known before the incident that the flesh that symbolizes love is a man or a dog.
Their picture is the literature and art represented by this "Roshan Mountain".
But he was temporarily told to touch this part of him, and was able to "sex" as an admission ticket, and was often forcibly "charged" before he had time to turn around.
Shi Hang is really enough of a chicken thief.
Look at these victimized women he voluntarily selected, or young directors, or theater lovers at book clubs.
Almost all of them have the attribute of "worshiping him".
Don't underestimate the word "worship".
It signifies an unattainable sense of distance and a longing prayer.
If Shi Hang is compared to manure, then his target is the monthly season in the saline-alkali land.
Dry plants that do not need manure (equal status), or xerophytes that do not need manure (which have no interest in the field of theater), without any conditions, this manure is worthless (power is instantly disenchanted), only dirty and smelly.
But once the most suitable theater believer is identified, he only needs to appear, and he will take the posture of God.
They are not in a hurry to get started, they must first taste a trace of ganlin that they once dared not imagine.
It's Shi Hang, it's this well-known big man in the theater industry, this judge in the Wuzhen theater industry, talking to you about drama.
Then he set a ridiculous price for this Ganlin - a sex deal.
Naturally, Shi Hang was not stupid enough to bluntly say, "If you want to keep in touch with me, then accept my touch." ”
This statement is a threat to power, but his behavior is all with this hint.
For the girl WZ, he first responded to the girl's private message that she did not expect, and exchanged thoughts on the drama festival. Then he invited the girl to the hotel where she was staying, under the guise of "talking" and using "books" as bait.
If it's really in the room, it has nothing to do with drama.
"WZ was still discussing a play or a book, and she noticed that the other person didn't answer, as if not interested, but instead said headlessly, 'Tonight I'm going to explore the softest part of your body.'" ”
Image source | Sanlian Life Weekly "Shi Hang Suspected of Sexual Harassment: Years of Silence, They Choose to Tell at This Moment" by Jing Jing and Wang Haiyan
He staged similar operations several times, and after the harassment, he did not disdain to disguise the online chat, and began to think that he was polite and complaining.
How can you ask for a girl at this time?
Instantly recognized the facts, cut off the long-desired thing, and then picked up the drama and this flesh that once symbolized theater?
Of course we hope so, but hopefully it should not be a requirement.
They are also nothing more than flesh and blood with seven passions and six desires.
That reverent inertia, how can it be so easy to brake the car?
After the incident broke out, many people began to comment on the weakness and hollowness of Shi Hang's "cultural person" identity, and I can understand this anger at the attack on his weakness.
But I don't really want to follow this trend.
Weakness and hollowness may be true, but that is only hindsight.
Saying more, on the contrary, it seems that the girls are fooled and blind.
And the truth is that no matter how weak he is, those halos in the industry have really been held in his hands.
Whether it is the pathology of the circle, or the cunning of himself, he has the ability to deceive the world.
What's more, this scam has falsely taken the name of some literary and artistic beliefs.
It's really not unusual to be fooled and can't stop the car for a while, and can't come back to God.
Lin Yihan once described in the book the atrocities that the Chinese teacher inflicted on Fang Siqi, who loved literature.
Source| "Fang Siqi's First Love Paradise"
"Let her soul deceive her body."
——This is what Shihang did.
He invades the souls of girls in the name of theater.
Forcing girls to ignore their physical instinctive discomfort and pay for the dream that the truth is a sorrow.
Those who seem to have come and gone are "willing" to be the souls who have been robbed of themselves are still making the final defense of their beliefs.
Lin Yihan was still entangled with "a person who truly believes in Chinese, how can he betray this vast soup and soup that has been in context and tradition for more than five thousand years? ”。
She did not die from the brutality of a simple invasion.
She died from the collapse and betrayal of her literary faith.
And the teacher Shi who wrote the recommendation of the book, you can stop pretending not to know, while lamenting that "after a crisis-ridden growth, each of us is a survivor of youth", while using this "friendly army" posture to lead the survivors and further carry out the massacre.
And he also proves that it is not only the youth who are oppressed by patriarchy in the family and school, but also the life of women who are still oppressed by patriarchy after coming out of society.
This sexual power, which is more accessible to men in human society, permeates everywhere like air.
The power of the literati is pretended to be in the name of literature, and more commonly, the rich borrow money and the officials pretend to use official power.
Unlike Wen Qing, there are not a few girls who seek wealth and power and finally nod their heads to sexual exchange.
Seeing this, some male treasures don't rush to scratch their feet and say, "Look! The woman really has something for us, "Ha.
This innocent face is tantamount to Shi Hang's response: "I have never used the so-called power position to infringe on anyone."
First of all, trouble you men to unify the standard, don't say that you don't have the advantage of money power, and then say that women are trying to have your money power.
Anyway, we women are not afraid to show our ambitions, why don't men directly admit that they are vested interests?
Many men who are not from the second generation of wealth think that they are innocent, and they have worked hard since level.0 with their own lives.
As everyone knows, women in this game called Life, the initial setting is level-10 difficulty.
Achieving a leap by establishing a relationship with the opposite sex is also one of the survival options that cannot be reproached, and the premise is that you and I are willing to have something for each other.
Huang Ali, who wrote some time ago, also half-jokingly and half-seriously ridiculed that she was eager to get married, just to bind the "Harvard Business School" husband as a cash cow.
In order to force marriage, and even intimidate her boyfriend "everyone wants this pussy."
This so-called "Muqiang" mentality will appear more or less in the growth path of girls.
I don't think it's women who are responsible.
Because it is not women themselves who teach women to realize themselves through men.
It is the patriarchal society that tells us that to do a good role of dependency, what you attach to is equal to yourself.
It is better to be born well than to marry well, to be a good woman behind a successful man, family is the most important career for girls, don't they all imply this reason?
Under such brainwashing, what is wrong with clinging to a thick one for self-realization?
Don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating this kind of behavior.
It is just that such behavior should be awakened, but it is never the turn of those men with vested interests to accuse, to play a second humiliation of "fishing for women", "worshiping money" and "deserving to be bullied".
"Climbing is possession" is a fairy tale woven by patriarchy for objectifying women, and in the end there is no root to follow, and the price of letting others do it is to be borne by ourselves.
Now divorced, Huang Ali also paid the price.
And under the brainwashing, the deep desire for self-control in human nature has never been satisfied, and it must be forever in turmoil.
The end is the same, the brainwashed soul deceives the body, and then the whole life is divided, and the whole life is struggling for peace and self-consistency.
That's why I often find the crumbling discussion of "sexual consent" ridiculous.
Under the asymmetry of patriarchy, "sexual consent" is to some extent a false proposition.
After all, if women are not educated to form an independent and complete personality from an early age, what can the yes or no expressed to the superior under the crippled personality have any meaning?
Just as young children do not have the ability to act responsibly, many women's personalities are actually locked into a "infantile" state by patriarchal society at an early age.
Under the education of "you can't rely on yourself, just reach out and ask for it", the so-called "I do" may be behind the consideration of survival, the cult of patriarchy, the manifestation of Stockholm syndrome, and the compromise for stability.
How much is about the pure sexual pleasure of an independent personality?
Source|Weibo @Blacktailgull1988
Huang Ali once said that the biggest advantage of having a baby and earning money is that "even if you no longer agree to your husband's sexual requests at any time, you don't have to worry that he will turn away." ”
"Mortgages, car loans, children, we are tied together."
It sounds funny, but inside it's bleak.
Women's sexuality, all her life, carries a transactional attribute.
Whether it's trading naked money or trading a stable intimate relationship.
It's not that women don't need sex, but that under the patriarchy, there is very little female sex, really only about sex.
Behind the phrase "I do", there are thousands of purposes of desire.
It is not our "attempt" that is wrong.
It is the fault of those in power who block our own access to the "attempt".
Open another false pathway on one side and mark it with the price tag they want.
After that, just wait.
Waiting for the girls to come to the door themselves, to the mirage at the end of the road, and say:
"I do."
This is also the essence of the sentence that resonates with me the most in Xiao Mo's voiced text, "all roads lead to history".
No matter how women walk, they can't avoid the top-down "barricades" in this structure that have long been waiting for you to pay the toll.
Enough has been said about structural dilemmas, so let's end with something practical.
In the case of Shi Hang, in addition to anger and attitude, what can we learn from it?
First, be aware of some truths that you may never have been aware of before, or that have been deliberately concealed by the opposite sex:
In the relationship between the sexes, do not doubt or deviate from your own line because the other party is doing a good job.
The boundary between right and wrong in sex is always drawn at the moment you feel uncomfortable.
No matter what industry authority the other party is, only you are the only person in charge of your body.
Therefore, the rules of sex, the decision is yours.
Source|Weibo @Blacktailgull1988
Moreover, even if the other party is not a virtue like Shi Hang, but a clean and tidy handsome, it is also a crime to touch you just after you met.
After realizing that something is wrong, do you speak up now?
Resisting, but recklessly breaking the net, is certainly not the best course of action.
You see the process of Xiao Mo being sexually harassed at that time, and the first thing she subconsciously worries about is not the current perpetrator, but the reputation price she will have to pay for it in her future life, and she can't afford to pay.
Source|Weibo @Blacktailgull1988
As the Korean drama said, "sensitive points don't hurt", we have to leave evidence, and it is not too much to use various legal means to defend.
First, don't easily go to the other party's private domain (note that girls are not disciplined to be "serious" not to go to other people's homes, on the other hand, it is not a good boy who abides by male morality by calling the opposite sex to the house casually)
Second, public places such as movie theaters should have monitoring even if it is dark, and it is not good to have a seizure on the spot, but you can try to ask the theater afterwards to retain evidence.
To deal with those dirty things that have 10,000 ways to get rid of sin, you really have to keep 10,000 eyes.
As the saying goes, when you kill one cockroach, you bring out countless other cockroaches hiding in the room.
Every time these news appear, there must be many similar people who exonerate the perpetrator in the comment area below (just convenient for me to pull the black ha), and this time it is the same, and the clamor comes and goes with two views:
One is "this woman, it's not simple", casually labeling women as bad and covering the conclusion, I don't bother to refute it.
What is exposed is not that they want women to be simple-minded and only brainless to obey men's selfish mentality.
He himself can swell his face.
And the other thing that seems to be reasonable is that "no evidence is that you spread rumors infinitely".
Want evidence?
Shi Hang himself is the evidence itself.
One is doing harm while fooling the work, and the other is suffering while worrying about the future.
Isn't this gap between unscrupulousness and caution the oppression of power that has never been seen or hammered?
And he can justifiably say the phrase "I have never used my so-called position of power against anyone" to say the same thing, which is ironclad evidence itself.
He knew all too well what was endorsing his transgression.
Source|Weibo @Blacktailgull1988
Again, it's really hard to break the structural dilemma.
But it doesn't mean endure, numbness, giving up.
I really admire and thank the victims for bravely standing up and declaring war in the form of tearing open sores and blurring flesh and blood.
When they are all collectively pretending to be confused.
It is all the more important that we remain soberly questioning and firmly opposed.
Until piecing together a picture of the truth about women that completely shattered their lies.
Just as Xiao Mo said.
"Time is on our side."