Light up yourself, illuminate the world, and the education of love is the future
Recently, due to an article in the public account of the People's Daily, farmer Li Xiangzhi was brought into the public's field of vision.
After watching their family's experience, people can't help but think of Zheng Juan in the hit drama "The World" some time ago.
In "The World of Man", Zhou Mu once described Zheng Juan as a pillar of refreshing incense that is not easy to extinguish.
Deeply agreed, if Zheng Juan is the refreshing incense of the Zhou family, then Li Xiangzhi is the refreshing incense of the Li family.
A careful comparison will show that such people usually have 3 things in common: based on kindness and tolerance, with optimism and resilience as the shield, and with knowledge and insight as the spear.
01 Inclusion of kindness: Reshaping the background of the home
One day in 1999, two yellow-skinned children came to Li Xiangzhi, the two daughters of his wife and ex-husband.
Because their biological father was lazy and gambling, the sisters were hungry and full, not to mention reading.
But in this situation, even if the birth mother Li Shuiying is distressed about her daughter, she also knows the difficulties of the family now.
Because at that time, Li Xiangzhi not only had to take care of the deaf and dumb eldest brother, but also the two sons and a daughter left behind after the death of his ex-wife, plus Li Shuiying's younger daughter, a family of 7 was difficult, but Li Xiangzhi still quickly accepted two children.
Years later, the eldest daughter, Li Xiaoling, wrote an article called "Father's Love Like a Mountain" to describe the feelings at that time: At that time, we only felt that our lives were saved.
Yes, for 2 young children, being able to eat at this time, no longer being beaten and scolded, and not being bullied by others because they are not disciplined, is already salvation.
But as a stepfather, Li Xiangzhi did more than that.
Li Xiaoling once wrote: My father regarded us as his own, did not say scolding, and even said that he had made a mistake with us, but also patiently laid out the reasoning and told stories to enlighten us.
Even more, when seeing the three sisters' talent in learning, in the face of the neighbor's "taking in is already a great righteousness, why should I read again", I still gritted my teeth and insisted on letting the children read, but I did not buy a new dress for many years.
I remember that once it rained heavily, Li Xiangzhi put down his farm work and walked seven or eight miles to the school to deliver umbrellas to the children.
In the end, the children did not get wet, but he was soaked all over the body, had a fever and coughed for a long time, and he was reluctant to pay for treatment, so he stayed up for half a month.
In fact, in the eldest daughter's self-report, at first, because her father did not hurt her mother, she was full of hatred in her heart although she was young.
But perhaps it is precisely because Li Xiangzhi can accept them without hesitation, insist on letting them study no matter how hard he is, and have a selfless care in life, that he has the transformation of his eldest daughter.
I have to say that it is the kindness and tolerance in human nature that reshapes the background of the home, so that the children can experience happiness and learn to be grateful.
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02 Optimism and resilience: Support your family
Li Xiangzhi has been bitter for most of his life, and even lives in a 40-square-meter staff dormitory.
When the sisters arrived at their mother's new home, there were 9 people in the family who needed to eat and drink, but there were only a few acres of thin land. 6 children, 3 in junior high school, 3 in primary school, a year of tuition and miscellaneous fees to more than 6,000 yuan.
But the roof leaked during the overnight rain, on the one hand, Li Shuiying, a mother who was supposed to be the main labor force in the family, was found to have rheumatoid arthritis, and soon lost her ability to work, and could only do a little basic housework.
On the other hand, in order to support the life of the whole family, Li Xiangzhi chartered more than a dozen acres of land, planted vegetables, rice, and seeds, and got up early every day to do farm work in the dark, almost all year round.
But even if the burden is all on himself, Li Xiangzhi did not say a word of complaint about life to the children, but often said: This world is very good, hard work can get rich, and angry to make money, hard work has a way out.
The eldest daughter Li Xiaoling told a story in "Father's Love Like a Mountain".
In 2008, when the southern ice disaster occurred, the school where the little sister re-studied was in the hardest hit area, and the stepfather Li Xiangzhi was not at ease, and he walked more than 20 miles in the cold, and even spent 300 yuan to hire a car to find the school.
At that time, there was only one little sister left in the dormitory building, and she had not eaten anything hot for two days. The little sister once said that when her stepfather led her on the ice, her heart was warm.
After spending 300 yuan to take her daughter home, the family almost couldn't afford to buy meat for the New Year. Li Xiangzhi comforted the family and said that as long as the family is together, it is the best year.
In 2010, both daughters were admitted to graduate school, and his wife, Li Shuiying, was very opposed, believing that they should work after graduating from college.
But as a stepfather, Li Xiangzhi is as supportive as ever, saying that it has been difficult to live before, not worse than these years.
A family of 9, but also for 6 children to study, but only 1 full labor force, it is conceivable that the family life has been very bitter.
For example, sweet potato bibimbap, a meal that many people stopped eating in the 1980s, but their family ate it until 2002.
But even so, he always gave the children the greatest support.
It is this resilience and optimism in the face of difficulties that allows him to lead his family out of the most difficult moments.
Today, the eldest daughter is a civil servant, the second daughter is a software engineer in Silicon Valley, the youngest daughter is an excellent municipal high school teacher, and in the photo posted, the three stepdaughters have become a family.
The optimism of the stepfather and the resilience in the face of difficulties not only ensure the continuous material support for the children, so that the three children can swim freely in the ocean of knowledge, but also guide the children to become useful to society and responsible for the family from the action.
03 Knowledge: Guiding the direction of the home
From the words of the news report, it can actually be found that the reason why Li Xiangzhi has always supported children's reading is inseparable from his own experience.
Although he had been cultivating all his life, Li Xiangzhi himself was a rare high school student of that era, and he usually loved to learn, and even the technical backbone of the village.
In a simple interview video, Li Xiangzhi said that he respects knowledge and as long as the children can get admitted, he firmly supports it.
That's what he said and that's what he did.
In the Li family, there is an unwritten "family rule", that is, "no matter who it is, after entering high school, you must study wholeheartedly."
In an interview, her daughter Li Xiaoling also said that a belief that her father has always conveyed to them is that "only reading is the only way out of the countryside, and only reading can change the fate."
For the children, Li Xiangzhi is also their role model.
When his eldest daughter participated in the recruitment examination of public institutions, he also encouraged that he could participate in the recruitment examination at the age of 52 and successfully apply for the station manager, as a young person, she should not be afraid of exercise. He also gave his eldest daughter a mock examiner, and even hit the interview questions.
In fact, the famous educator Herbert Spencer once said, "When a child is in a family atmosphere of understanding, respect and encouragement, he will have a greater sense of trust in his parents and will make his growth more motivated." ”
Yes, if kindness, tolerance and optimism and resilience give children the background to life, then the parents' knowledge and cognition determine how far they can help children go.
Perhaps it is precisely because of Li Xiangzhi's identification with learning in his bones, his understanding and respect for children, that the three children have such achievements.
Taiwanese writer Huang Shuwen once said, "As long as you live out the example you give your child, the child will naturally grow into the person they see." ”
For Li Xiangzhi, although he is only a farmer, because of his respect for knowledge and his firm belief in reading, he has always had strength in his heart.
Therefore, in the face of external disturbances, he can adhere to his heart, give the children the right guidance for their lives, and support the children to a higher starting point in life with kindness and tolerance, optimism and resilience.
And when a family has such a "refreshing incense", we will find that even if fate is uncertain and experiences despair, they can always lead the family out, and the brilliance of their humanity will also illuminate the path of those around them.
May every family have such a "refreshing fragrance", escort the family boat, help children ride the wind and waves in good times, and go up the river in adversity.
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