This article is original by Tu Ma Ai Na Na, all rights reserved, infringement will be investigated
Nowadays, with the liberalization of the birth policy, many parents have joined the army of second-child children.
There are many reasons to have a second child, some people think that the only child is too squeamish and selfish, and two children help to improve the situation, some people think that two children can avoid "losing independence", and some people frankly say that two children can share the pressure of parental pension...
Among the many reasons for childbirth, there is one that is the most classic, but it is also rejected by many people, that is, many parents hang on their lips: we give birth to a second child in order to give our children a companion.
Colleague Xiao Jiang and his daughter have been in an awkward relationship recently.
Xiao Jiang's daughter just entered the first year of junior high school this year, and after the birth policy was released, Xiao Jiang and her husband decided to have a second child after careful consideration.
Adding people to the family is a big thing, so Xiao Jiang communicated with her daughter before preparing to get pregnant, and she told her daughter that the reason why she and her father wanted to have a second child was not to raise children and prevent aging, let alone to prefer sons to daughters, but to leave her a relative in this world.
Unsurprisingly, the daughter, who has just entered adolescence, is very opposed to this.
She bluntly said that she enjoys the life of an only child very much, she has parents and classmates and girlfriends, and will form a family with her other half in the future, so she does not feel lonely at all, on the contrary, once she has brothers and sisters, her quality of life will be reduced.
In the end, the communication was fruitless, and the daughter directly went mad: I hate that you say that you have a second child in order to give the child a companion, because I don't need this companion at all!
Like XiaoJiang, in real life, when many parents talk about their reasons for having a second child, they say that their original intention is to "give Dabao a companion.".
But unexpectedly, this seemingly all-for-child good answer has been rejected by many people, and even some netizens bluntly said that this is a very "hypocritical" reason.
"My mother is more than 40 years old, and once she suddenly told me that she wanted to have a second child, and I directly said that I didn't want to, and that a good birth is a relative, and a bad birth is an enemy."
"The real idea of many parents having a second child is to provide for the elderly and prevent the loss of independence, giving a companion to the child is just a little better to say, in fact, who does not know that single children are the most popular."
"My mother gave birth to a second child when I was in the 6th grade of elementary school, and when she said that she had a brother to be my companion, I was really repulsive, because the age difference was so big, now my brother and I don't have a common language at all." 」
"I believe that leaving a relative for a child is the reason for parents to have a second child, but this is by no means the only reason, most parents have a second child or want to leave a way for their own pension."
Obviously for the sake of children, why is this reason offensive?
1. Dabao is extremely repulsive to the second child.
In life, many children are very repulsive to the behavior of their parents to have a second child, especially the age difference between the two children is too large, in the case of easy generation gap, younger siblings not only can not be with themselves, but will become their own father's love and mother's love of the divider.
Therefore, if Dabao is very repulsive to the second child, they will not accept that their parents have a second child for their own company reasons.
2. This is not what parents really think.
We do not deny that many parents do have a second child in order to be a companion for the eldest, but in real life, there are also many parents who have different hearts.
In the eyes of these parents, being a companion is an answer that sounds very capable of showing the love of the father and the mother, in fact, behind this reason is their most real idea: having a second child is to pave the way for the elderly, having a second child is because the family values sons over daughters, and having a second child is to avoid the risk of losing independence...
When children perceive the true intention of their parents to have a second child, they will naturally reject the "hypocrisy" of being a companion.
How do parents communicate with Dabao when they have a second child?
Generally speaking, although the decision of the second child is only in the husband and wife, when many parents decide to have another small baby, they will ditch with Dabao to make psychological preparations.
At this time, the parents' reason for having a second child will become very important, if Dabao is still young and his mind is not yet mature, parents can tell their children that he can have one more child as a companion after the birth of the second child.
However, if Dabao has matured and has his own thoughts and opinions on things, it is recommended that parents truthfully tell their children the reasons for having a second child, and rationally analyze the pros and cons with the child, otherwise some self-righteous answers will be rejected by the child and then labeled as "hypocritical".
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"The purpose of having a second child is to give a child a companion", do you resent this reason for childbirth? Welcome to leave a message in the comment area!
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