Make a living first and then love, first love yourself and then love others.
There is a passage that says:
"At the beginning of the relationship, you have to consider whether you like this person or not, and after getting along for a long time, you have to consider whether you like yourself at the moment."
If you become grumpy, humble, and even you can't look up to yourself, it proves that the relationship is actually not for you.
The meaning of two people together is to grow up with each other and appreciate together, not to let you slowly grow into a face that is bullied by life. ”
Deeply.
Remember Liu Mintao, the big sister who became popular on Weibo because of her cover of "Red High Heels", "three points of ridicule, four points of carelessness"?
Now she seems to have unlimited style, but in fact, she has also experienced a long period of bleak and dull days.
She fell in love not long after her debut, and gave up her career because of love.
After getting married, she resolutely quit her job and returned home to become a housewife, devoting all her time and energy to her family and children.
At that time, she thought that her husband and godson were the best destination for women.
Until one day, she and her husband went on a trip, because of an ice cream, suddenly realized their humility and paleness in marriage.
She said it was the weakest, but also the most sober, day of her life.
At that time, they were playing at a certain attraction, and she saw that the scenic spot sold ice cream, so she especially wanted to eat a matcha flavor.
But because she had no money in her pocket and her husband was unwilling to buy it for her, she didn't eat it.
The ice cream that she hadn't eaten was like a thorn in her heart, and from time to time it was responding to and poking at her.
One night, she couldn't sleep over and over, thinking all these years of marriage, marriage, family, and men, what had brought her, and she had harvested the happiness and happiness she had once expected.
The answer is no.
Not only did he not reap happiness and happiness, but he let himself, who should have been radiant, live cheaply and humblely in his best years.
So she decided to divorce, and she eventually divorced.
After the divorce, she returned to work, picked up her dreams step by step, and also walked into the spotlight to realize the value of her life.
Looking back on this past afterwards, she tearfully said that she wanted to thank herself for her sobriety and sanity at that time.
If love doesn't make you the icing on the cake as you hoped, it's like an eraser that wipes away the original brilliance of your life.
It is better to abandon it, to be yourself, to stand alone, not to rely on, not to be afraid.
Good love should allow you to see the whole world outside through each other. And not because he makes you doubt life or even hate the world.
In the movie "No Questions", Shufen blocked all her youth to love Xu Bochang, saving money for him to study, all the way to college.
Once upon a time, Xu Bo often had two feelings for her, and his affection was unswerving. He promised her that when she succeeded in her studies in the future, he would marry her and love her for the rest of his life.
But later, after graduating from college, he repented and refused to marry her. It was because she forced her to die with a knife that he reluctantly married her into the door.
After marriage, he never opened his eyes to look at her, and he was always cold to her, worse than to strangers on the road.
I don't want to sit at the same table with her when I eat, I don't want to share a bowl with her when I drink water, I don't want to sleep with her in the same bed, in a room.
His invisible cold violence made her tortured and miserable.
Outsiders only saw her unreasonable teasing and thought she was a lunatic. But I can't see his ruthlessness and ingratitude.
He made her feel like the worst and saddest person in the world.
At the end of the story, she jumps down a well on an ordinary day and ends her life.
Every time I think of this storyline, I am not worth it for Shu Fen.
She was too screwed up and too obsessed, and she had to marry someone who didn't love herself, leaving herself trapped in a cage for most of her life, desperate and helpless.
Seriously, love is a matter of two people, do not be self-righteous and feel that you can change or influence each other through one person's efforts.
No matter what you do, even if you give it everything, in the end you will not be able to exchange his pity and love, but will only make yourself suffer and grievance.
Only those who truly love you know that you have given everything and can entrust your future and the rest of your life.
A passage that I particularly agree with goes like this:
"Falling in love is for someone to rely on someone to love, not a stomach grievance, a pillow of tears, turning over and over to think about whether this relationship is worth it." 」
This passage is for everyone who sees this article.
If you can, hopefully you'll always be sober and not love someone who will make you cheap.
If you want to love, you have to love someone who treats you as a baby, gives you warmth, does not need you to tiptoe, and will also take the initiative to bend down and hug you.
I hope that he can give you the right tenderness and companionship, so that you can appreciate the scenery of the four seasons of life in a life full of love.
I hope that because you love each other, you have made each other a better person.
- END -
Author: Jiang Classmate & Xin He, 97 years of sagittarius female, love to eat hot pot, I have wine, waiting for you to come to me nagging. Public number: Jiang classmate with a story (ID: meiya54264), please contact the background for reprinting.