Holiday time is always so short, for this precious leisure time, students naturally cherish, will seize the time to do something meaningful.
However, under the influence of human sophistication, students also have times when they are involuntarily, and they often do some things that they are reluctant to do at the request of their parents, such as lecturing to the children of relatives.
Obviously it is their own happy holiday, but they have to take time to deal with some familiar and unfamiliar topics, but also responsible for teaching the children of relatives, if the other party's attitude is good, I am afraid that I will encounter the following situation, which will inevitably make people have a feeling of "thanklessness".
Lecturing relatives' children why they are "thankless"
A netizen has been an honor student since she was a child, and in the eyes of relatives and friends, she is the representative of "other people's children".
She was admitted to a prestigious university in the college entrance examination, and her parents were proud of her. But every time she comes home from vacation, she has to face new troubles - relatives will bring their children to the door for advice.
Her university is highly talented and competitive, and she wants to use her vacation time to consolidate her foundations or learn some professional knowledge, but the visit of relatives can completely disrupt her plans.
One of the relatives especially gave her a headache, and directly said that she let the child come to her house every day to write winter vacation homework, and if there is no problem, you can get her guidance at any time.
"Our children's English foundation is not good, the final exam results are too poor, it just so happens that you are a high talent born at home, do not look for you to find anyone, are relatives, you will not not help it." 」
Relatives asked her in an affectionate tone, and the words had a smell of "taking it for granted" that made her feel very uncomfortable.
"Auntie, I'm not an English major, and I'm afraid of delaying your children." And I have a lot of tasks to accomplish myself, you see..."
She refused as gently as possible, but the other party sent the child to her house as if she did not understand. She inevitably complained to her parents, but her parents advised her to "be a relative after all, if you can help, try to help."
She had no choice but to accept this task, but found that the child's foundation was really poor, and the learning attitude was not correct. She bothered to study the topic and the method of reconciliation, and seriously told the child, but the effect was like "playing the piano to the cow".
There was really no way, she made an excuse to go out, let the relatives stop sending the child, but the result was to annoy the relatives, saying in person that she was "cultured but impersonal", and refused to help.
Her parents also had to lecture her, saying that she didn't understand things, making them embarrassed in front of their relatives.
This netizen was sullen, aggrieved, and sad, she shared her experience and wanted to ask everyone if she really "did it wrong".
In fact, the answer is very obvious, the wrong is not this netizen, but the so-called "human touch" without a sense of proportion and boundary.
Ask your child about a relative's questions and be more empathetic
Indeed, every parent is very concerned about their children's academic performance, hoping that children can learn from more excellent objects, which is understandable, but how to learn, but must pay attention to ways and methods, otherwise not only can not let children get promoted, but also may damage their own interpersonal relationships, causing unnecessary interpersonal estrangement.
1. Taking the topic of taking the child to consult for advice as an example, parents must first fully consider the child's wishes.
For example, some children have strong self-esteem, are unwilling to ask their brothers, sisters, uncles and aunts for advice in a low voice, and parents do not have to force them, otherwise the effect of learning will certainly not be ideal.
If some children have arranged holiday activities for themselves, but parents force them to go to relatives' homes to study, this will also be resisted by children.
2. Secondly, parents should have empathy and consider whether the person being consulted has practical difficulties.
For example, parents should find out whether the other party has enough time and energy to give their children a topic, and do not use the phrase "are relatives" to morally kidnap each other, which will only cause the other party to resent.
Tong Dad has a saying: It is not that relatives cannot ask each other for advice, but they must fully consider the difficulties of others.
If the child does have some questions, parents can guide the child to sort out the problems, choose a few representative questions, and consult each other at the appropriate time, so that it will not consume too much time and will not add trouble to the other party.
Finally, parents should not forget to remind their children that after asking others for advice, they must express their gratitude with a sincere attitude, and they must not feel that each other's efforts are taken for granted because they are related to each other.
Teach children to thank all the help, children will be more popular, such a truth, parents must not ignore Oh.