At noon on January 28, the entertainment industry has another big melon:
Huang Xiaoming and Angelababy officially announced their divorce!
The two first posted the same Weibo:
Grateful for all the past, the future is still family!
Subsequently, the studio also issued a statement separately, saying that the two had completed the formalities, ended the marriage relationship, and would raise the children together in the future.
From the announcement of their relationship in 2014, to the fact that they have become strangers again after one shot and two scatters, it has only been 7 years.
In the past 7 years, the picture of the two high-profile shows love has been brushed across the Internet, and the "Wedding of the Century" has made countless people envious.
But even high-profile feelings will have a shelf life, as early as a few years ago, they broke the divorce rumors.
Although the two did not respond at the time, they have not interacted much since then.
Nowadays, it seems that divorce has long been traced, and as for the reasons, there are many opinions.
However, rather than speculating about the reason for the divorce, the public is more concerned about what to do with the children after the divorce of the two, and even there are such paragraphs on the Internet:
Of course, jokes are jokes, and as a father, bacteria want to ask:
Can you really be a homemaker again after divorce?
Does divorce have no effect on the children?
Especially for the little sponge growing up in the love and care of parents, is it really no impact?
Although the marriage between Huang Xiaoming and Baby has often caused controversy, the love between the two for Little Sponge is absolutely true.
In April 2021, Huang Xiaoming was revealed to have taken his son to the hospital to see a doctor, and the family of three also visited a convenience store together, and the picture was particularly warm.
In October 2021, some netizens met Huang Xiaoming and baby with a small sponge to the hotel together, which was the last time a family of three was photographed in the same frame.
On January 17 this year, Huang Xiaoming also posted a birthday photo of a small sponge on the social platform, and his love for the child was overflowing.
Can the 4-year-old sponge, who has been living in the favor of his parents, really accept this sudden change?
Many people may say that the child is only 4 years old, can he remember what? Not really.
According to Erikson's theory of child psychological development, the 4-year-old sponge is in the stage of relying on the family to establish his own behavior patterns, and it is impossible to accept such changes.
As the "second generation of stars", as the center of the whirlpool of public opinion, how should a small person treat himself?
Although both of them said that the love for their children will not change, neither of us can give an answer to what the future will be.
The only thing that is certain is that Huang Xiaoming and Baby are divorced, and their little sponge is only 4 years old!
1
Children whose parents divorced
What it turned out to be
There are many divorced celebrity couples in the entertainment industry, and even more have children.
Among them, there are many negative cases, such as Dong Jie.
After divorcing Pan Yueming, Dong Jie did not allow him to visit his son, and always hinted to his son that "you don't have a father, it is your mother who raised you alone."
So much so that in an interview, Pan Yueming couldn't help but cry after hearing his son say that "Dad is very busy at work".
In the face of such parents, their children can only bear everything silently and are forced to bear the pressure that does not match their age.
Netizens jokingly called him "growing up overnight", but there must be unknown pain behind this growth.
The positive case comes from the article and Ma Yili.
After the two divorced, the article often accompanied the children.
Once accompanied his daughter to a dance competition, he also posted his daughter's award certificate in the circle of friends, and said that he had not slept all night and had been proud of his daughter since five o'clock in the morning.
Under this circle of friends, there are also comments from Ma Yili, saying that the article is hard as a father.
And with the love from both parents, Ma Yili and Wenwen's two daughters are also well protected.
From the daily life posted by Ma Yili's Weibo, it can be seen that the two little guys are cheerful and cute personalities, and the eldest daughter has repeatedly won awards in dance competitions.
Behind two very different cases is a fact:
If parents can still face each other peacefully after divorce and maintain love for their children, then children can still grow up healthy and happy.
But if after the divorce, parents can't give their children normal care and love, and even package their desire for control in the name of love, it will make the child doubly miserable.
The impact of parental divorce on children is not fixed, and the reason for this change is actually how parents deal with relationship breakdown and even divorce.
Of course, compared to divorce, in fact, in our lives, the following phenomena are more common:
The child is still young, and I will endure it for ta.
Divorced, what about the children?
Can't get a divorce, surely the children can't accept it?
Parents will seek perfection for the sake of their children, and no matter how much they screw, argue, and suffer, they will maintain the marriage.
But is this what children want?
Bacteria do not support parental divorce, but also do not approve of maintaining marriage in this way, the impact on children is too great.
2
What hurts children the most is not divorce
It's the hurt of parents to each other
Many parents, with a good attitude for their children, barely maintain a shaky marriage.
As everyone knows, when the relationship between parents breaks down, the harm to the child is already generated.
There is an animated short film in Thailand, "Parents Quarrel is a Child's Horror Film", which is about the damage caused to children by the breakdown of parental relationships.
In the short film, the fiercely quarreling parents turn into hideous monsters in the eyes of their children.
Eventually, the girl fled alone in fear, uttering a desperate cry.
In reality, there are many such cases.
A primary school student once wrote this message to his parents after witnessing his parents quarrel many times:
Dad I went to school!
Mom and Dad Don't Caojia (Quarrel)
Again caojia (quarrel) I committed suicide
More media have reported that a 22-year-old boy hanged himself in order to persuade his parents to reconcile.
Numerous news events have shown that a fierce argument between parents can do a huge toll on a child, whether the child is a schoolboy who has just started school or an adult who has been able to live independently.
The book "Intimate Relationships" also mentions the influence of good or bad parental relationships on children:
In a complete family with harmonious parents, the child's subjective happiness is the highest; in a family with a very high parental conflict, if the child's subjective happiness is forced to be complete, the child's subjective happiness will be reduced to a negative number.
Therefore, the key to the health and happiness of children is not whether the parents are divorced, but what kind of love the parents give the children.
3
Parents divorced
How to minimize harm to your child
In psychology, family integrity has two levels of meaning: one is structural integrity, and the other is functional integrity.
If parents are unable to maintain the integrity of the family structure after trying various methods, then we must try our best to make the children feel the complete love from the parents.
◆ Communicate frankly with your child
Many people, after divorce, will hide the fact of divorce from their children.
This kind of behavior seems to be good for the child, but if the child knows the truth one day, there will be a strong sense of being deceived.
Therefore, if the marriage really cannot be maintained, it is still necessary to openly and honestly explain the situation to the child, and let the child understand that no matter what the parent's feelings are, the love for him is unchanged.
◆ Defend each other and don't say bad things
After divorce, many couples not only have resentment towards each other in their hearts, but also convey this emotion to their children.
Some people will even deliberately instill in their children the idea of being abandoned by their father or mother, hoping to make them closer to themselves. It is not known that this behavior will further aggravate the pain in the child's heart.
After all, all children want to have both parents who truly love and care for themselves at the same time.
◆ Give your child unchanging love
After the divorce, although the husband and wife will no longer live together, they must let the child feel that the love of the parents for themselves remains unchanged.
If possible, both parents can find opportunities to accompany their children together.
In this way, in the process of actually getting along, the child will understand that although mom and dad no longer live together, they will still be with them when they need it.
Regardless of the parents' marriage, the love for the child is always in one direction, full of infusion.
This is the best way to stop losses after not giving a child a complete family, and it is also the last respect for each other.
The famous writer Keigo Higashino once said: Many children who have both parents and end up living in misfortune, whether the child is happy or not, does not depend on whether the parents are both perfect.
It is true that having a happy and warm family is the dream of every child.
But if the family of origin is really no longer able to maintain integrity, what parents need to do is not to deceive their children, nor to keep their children living in quarrels or cold wars.
Instead, after dealing with your own negative emotions, you can be honest with your child and tell him: No matter what, I love you equally.
Whether it is the "second generation of stars" with their own concerns, or every ordinary child, the fungus hopes that they can get full love from their parents and meet their future lives healthily and happily.
Finally, the fungus wants to say that eating melons is eating melons, but:
Whether it is a star, or an ordinary and ordinary us, I hope that everyone can treat the divorce rationally.
Don't be a fermented keyboard man, let alone an executioner of public opinion!
In this cold winter month, more kindness, so that there is no longer a second Liu Xuezhou in this world.
Editor-in-Charge: Wyelow
Image/Video Source: Network/Baby Care Comics Group, Invasion and Deletion
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