A few days ago, the news of a pregnant woman in Chongqing "angrily cutting a wedding dress" rushed to the hot search.
The cause of the incident was that a ms. Jiang from Chongqing wanted to do a wedding and paid a deposit of 3500 yuan at the wedding dress shop.
Later, she decided not to have a wedding and wanted to go to the wedding dress shop to get the deposit back.
I didn't want the store to say: "Because the deposit has been paid to the host, photography and other staff, and at that time, the contract between the two parties agreed that the deposit would not be refunded." ”
After several unsuccessful consultations, Ms. Jiang became more and more angry the more she thought about it, so she ran to the wedding dress shop with scissors and cut the wedding dress hanging in the store.
At that time, she was pregnant, and the clerk did not dare to stop her, but just took a video and reminded her: "These (wedding dresses) are thousands and tens of thousands, you can think clearly." ”
Ms. Jiang replied: "Tens of thousands? 100,000 can be, you dare to bully Lao Tzu..."
After the video was sent, the police intervened and determined that the 32 wedding dresses that were cut were worth 67,400 yuan.
On the 14th, the parties to the incident made the latest response that they had reached a settlement, and the final amount of compensation was 50,000 yuan.
On Weibo, a netizen's evaluation hit the nail on the head: "The store actually has no loss, but is happy to have money to change the wedding dress, this behavior is just to find themselves unhappy." There are many ways to solve things, and she chose the most impulsive one..."
The deposit of 3500 yuan that could have been used as a baby banquet was only because of Ms. Jiang's impulsiveness, which soared 14 times and became a compensation of 50,000 yuan.
That's the price of a hot head and an out-of-control mood.
As the saying goes, "People who can't control their emotions have to pay for their emotions all their lives." ”
A momentary impulse, regret for a lifetime
In fact, it is not uncommon for emotions to cause trouble because they are out of control.
In September last year, a video of a woman making a fuss about a chain gym in New Taipei City went viral on the Internet.
The woman wanted to take her pet cat into the gym with her but was refused because she didn't comply with gym regulations.
After that, she began yelling at the staff, stripped naked, and walked around the gym naked.
She deliberately made all kinds of indecent actions in front of people, disturbing others, even if she was watched, she did not care.
In the end, he was taken away by the police for "obstructing morals".
Because of a momentary impulse, she sent herself to the police station, and in a very disgraceful way, she was on the hot search.
Remember the anchor who was fired for arguing on a radio show?
It was a food show, and the topic of discussion was "Beijing is not a food desert."
In the show, the male anchor has been saying that Beijing roast duck is not a delicacy, and the female anchor can only interrupt several times for the show: "Let's listen to what everyone says..."
When the audience mentioned "Qianlong cabbage", the male anchor said contemptuously: "That is a cold dish." ”
In the next show, no matter what the female anchor says, the male anchor has to go to the bar, and finally even strikes and slams the door.
A day later, the program team issued an apology letter and announced the suspension of the anchor involved.
Some say that he was depressed for too long; others say that he may just be unhappy that day.
But in any case, none of this could be a reason for him to vent his emotions on the show.
Everyone will experience a lot of dissatisfaction every day, and everyone will have some grievances and anger in their hearts.
If everyone indulges their emotions, then any little friction can cause a big explosion in behavior.
Many people have heard of the "kicking cat effect":
A father was criticized by his boss at the company and came home to scold his children.
The child's heart was on fire, and he kicked the cat rolling around him fiercely.
The cat fled into the street, just as a truck drove by, the driver quickly avoided, but hit the child on the side of the road.
This story tells us two things:
First, bad emotions are contagious.
Second, indulging one's bad emotions will only lead to greater tragedies.
It seems to vent his emotions, but in fact he pushes himself into a more troublesome situation.
"Mr. Good" said that the biggest difference between adults and children is that adults have to clean up the mess themselves.
If you can't control your emotions, you can only pay for your bad emotions again and again.
If you face the problem with a different mindset, you will get a different answer
In the variety show "Tricks of the Journey", when Shen Teng was shopping in Morocco, he saw an iron artwork: an iron orangutan weighing 45 kilograms.
Shen Teng wanted to send the artwork back to China, but encountered many problems on the way to mail it.
First, there's how to get the artwork to the postal company.
Although Lin Chiling, who was traveling with her, borrowed a trolley from the hotel and transported it by car in the middle, the excessive weight still consumed a lot of physical strength.
Coupled with the hot weather in Morocco, after arriving at the express delivery point, everyone was a little impetuous and tired.
The bigger problem was that when buying the artwork, the merchant told Shen Teng that it was only 30 kilograms and could be mailed. But in reality, the iron orangutan weighed 45 kilograms and was severely overweight and could not be checked in.
After learning this news, Shen Teng was very depressed and even wanted to give up this work of art.
At this time, Lin Zhiling stood up, first calmed everyone's emotions, and then proposed a solution.
They switched to a courier company and eventually sent the artwork back to China.
In a follow-up interview, Shen Teng repeatedly praised Lin Chiling for being remarkable and patient.
In fact, many things in life are like this, rarely smooth sailing, more twists and turns.
At this time, if you can't press your emotions to calmly deal with things, good things may become bad things.
But if you can handle the problem gently, the original trouble may become a new life experience.
One thing, you treat it differently, and it will end up with a different ending.
Zhang Weijian once revealed in the variety show "Chasing the Light, Brother" that when he was filming the first costume play, because he did not understand many things, he acted in a mess, and the director was angry on the spot and angrily scolded him in front of everyone.
Seeing the atmosphere tense, Andy Lau, who starred in the starring role, stood up, he not only calmed the mood of the director and Zhang Weijian, but also directly showed Zhang Weijian how he should act.
Because of that help, Zhang Weijian identified Andy Lau as the "savior" of his costume drama, and later signed the brokerage contract to Andy Lau without saying a word.
Without the presence of and emotionally stable Andy Lau, it is hard to believe how things will develop.
Zhang Weijian may be more and more afraid the more he shoots, the more he does not know how to act, the progress of the whole play will be slowed down, the director will be more angry, and the whole thing will fall into a vicious circle.
Problems bring emotions, but emotions can't solve them
Therefore, instead of getting angry, it is better to calm down and face the problem with a different mentality.
Only by controlling emotions can we control life
I have seen such a story on the Internet.
A man hailed a taxi.
During the drive, the car in front of them suddenly braked sharply, and the two cars almost collided together.
At this time, the driver of the car in front of him suddenly rushed down and shouted at them:
"How do you drive!" You're going to hurt me for being late!" ”
Plain and for no reason almost encountered a car accident, but also by the former car owner so slandered, replaced by many people, it is likely to rush down and argue with the other party at this time, saying who is right and who is wrong.
But this driver didn't.
He just smiled and nodded, as if the wrong man was really himself.
The taxi driver didn't understand and asked him why he was doing it.
The driver explains:
"There are people in this world who are like garbage trucks, filled with disappointment, irritability, frustration and anger. When they fill up with garbage, they dump it on someone else. At this time, you don't have to care, just smile, wish them good luck, and then move on with your life. ”
We can't change what's about to happen to us, but we can control our attitudes toward things.
In the movie "The Godfather", the two sons of the Godfather are the best examples.
The eldest son, Sonny, was impulsive and reckless in everything, did not think about the consequences, and was finally shot into a honeycomb.
The younger son, with his own judgment and forbearance, has been dormant for many years, not only protecting his father, but also punishing the murderer.
Life is inevitably bumpy and ups and downs, and when you are not satisfied, you can control your emotions, and you can control your present and future.
Image source: Panorama Vision
Psychologically, there is a "Hercules" effect.
It is said that Hercules, named Hercules, encountered a bag on the road and stepped on it, and the result was that the bag became larger and larger, and finally blocked his way.
This bag is the "emotional bag.".
It's small at first, and if you ignore it, the problem will resolve.
If you have to live with it, it will grow bigger and bigger, becoming a roadblock on your way forward.
It is often said that truly mature people have long since quit their emotions.
The so-called quitting is not to say that there is no, but to be able to restrain emotions when impulsive.
Don't ruin your own present because you are out of control for a while. And by restraining yourself again and again, you control your life.
I like a passage from Sodagyi Khenpo:
"A person with a clean heart, a clear mind, and no excess emotions and delusions will bring people a sense of security. Because he doesn't hurt people, and he doesn't hurt himself. Don't make trouble, don't bother others. ”
The weak are as angry as tigers, and the strong are as calm as water.
Instead of being controlled by emotions, it is better to learn to control emotions and be its master.
Give a thumbs up and encourage the king.
Author: Jian Xi.