Disciplining 1-2 year olds, does "hitting" really work?

Netizen Contributions:

My baby is under 2 years old, the personality is very stubborn, I can't talk about it, I am curious and strong, I want to try everything, especially for some dangerous items and actions, it really makes people sweat. Every time I talk to him well, he seems to understand, but all of a sudden, when people are not paying attention, he will run to play, I really don't want to punish him with a beating, but sometimes there are times when my emotions are out of control, and the neighbors also say that I am too spoiled for children.

"If you don't obey, you have to beat him up well before you are afraid, and next time he won't dare to touch him."

Am I wrong? Is it really necessary to fight such a young child?

In the past, the concept always thought: "filial piety under the stick" and "no fight can not be a weapon", so the matter of "beating children" still has a great influence in our lives. But can a reward or punishment really drive a child to do what they're supposed to do?

From the perspective of developmental psychology, the moral development of children before the age of two is in the "chaotic period", when he does not have a set of moral standards based on which to judge right and wrong, and parents punish children when they make mistakes, so that children can associate painful experiences with events without repeating them. However, due to the overall cognitive ability of a child of one or two years old is still weak, he often does not understand the causal relationship of things (because he is naughty, so he is beaten), often beaten or re-offended, plus the heavy beating will hurt the child, hit lightly and he thinks that you are teasing him, sometimes after the beating, he will hit you back a few times, making everyone cry and laugh.

On the other hand, curiosity and exploration is the nature of children, but also the driving force of learning, when the child is one or two years old, parents on the one hand to worry about safety, on the one hand to let children have the opportunity and space to try, is indeed particularly hard, sometimes temper comes, inevitably will "move the mouth" and "hands", but in the "hands" of the impulse, it is best to first take a deep breath (if possible), and then think:

1. Why fight?

Is it because he is too upset and angry with the child, or is it very clear that the child has made dangerous moves, and maybe he will remember it next time.

2. How much do you play?

Hit the child, do not knock the head and slap, because on the gas head, often due to improper control of the force and cause accidental injury, if you must hit, the palm of the hand or ass is safer.

In fact, each child has a different personality, some are gentle and gentle, and there is no need to fight; some actions are fast and bold, and the way of beating can indeed avoid him from doing dangerous actions in the short term; some are stubborn, and after beating, he resists more fiercely, and parents can adjust the discipline principle according to the characteristics of the child.

But anyway, hitting a child is still the most unwise move. Especially for one- and two-year-olds, it is often better to use verbal rebukes or diversions to attract young children to do other things than to fight or continue the stalemate. Unfortunately, none of us are perfect parents and can only learn to control our emotions.

If it were your child, what would you do? Let's talk about the comment area together