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Now is a very competitive era, as long as one does not pay attention will fall behind others, so many parents from the child's "childhood" to pay special attention.
For example, I give my children a variety of cram classes and interest classes, and I want to cultivate my children into decathlon "other people's children".
But will the child be happy then?
I believe that most parents also know that children are unhappy.
Some parents will say:
I am also for the good of my child, he wants to live well in the future, and now he can only suffer more.
Parents' expectations and requirements for their children are understandable, and we certainly have to give our children some pressure.
If you completely let the children grow up freely or manage too loosely, in the middle and high school, the learning ability of these children is easy to keep up, and often they will suffer a lot of setbacks in the future.
But if the pressure is too great and the child cannot bear it, he will collapse, and it is also difficult to adapt to learning and life at this time.
Therefore, when we attach importance to children's learning, we must also take into account the child's emotions, so that we are more likely to cultivate excellent children.
In this regard, I give parents a few tips:
First of all, don't use your child as a tool for comparison.
Many parents like to compare their children with other people's children, just like children who have taken a hundred math and more than eighty Chinese tests, just say to their children:
You look at the little red next door to others, this time taking a double hundred.
When you only see where your child is inferior to others, ignoring the child's progress and proud performance, it will hit the child's confidence very much, and it will also develop the child's competitive character, so that the child becomes sensitive and jealous.
Second, we must know how to teach children according to their aptitudes.
Many parents are prone to fall into a misunderstanding, that is, imitate others to teach their children, think that others teach their children this way, her children are very good, I also teach this way, but this is a not very smart approach.
It's like some people have a headache and just take a break, and some people can only alleviate it by taking medicine, because everyone's physical condition is different, and the solution is different.
In the same way, each child is an independent individual, has its own characteristics, only according to the actual situation, the use of different educational methods for different children, children can progress.
Parents can observe more about what the child usually likes, in which aspect to do well, to discover the child's advantages, encourage the child to play their own advantages, no matter whether this advantage is now of great value, as long as he has an advantage, it is competitive, it is worth exploring and pioneering.
Finally, it is to give the child enough confidence, enough trust.
Children's trust in their parents is innate, and parents should also give back the same trust, parental trust will make children feel that they are right, so as to believe in their own ability and build self-confidence.
If parents always doubt their children, or do not believe that their children have the ability to solve problems, this will cause children to be stressed, and it will also cause children to not believe in their own abilities and become timid and inferior.
If you want your child to grow up better, in addition to paying attention to the child's material life and learning life, we must pay more attention to the child's mental health.
When you believe in the child, let go of the excessive expectations of the child, while patiently accompanying the child, teaching the child, when the child has a happy life, perhaps you will find that he also began to have a surprise change in learning.
Well, that's it for today. This article is original by [Lemon Psychology Classroom], pay attention to me, take you to increase knowledge together!