01
It's the rainy season again, and Sakurako walks down the streets at dusk, her slender figure like a poignant picture in the rain.
On her eighteenth birthday, Sakurako unexpectedly learns the secret of her life, which is like a terrifying wave that knocks her calm boat to pieces.
When the rainy season arrives, Sakurako's birthday also arrives as scheduled.
On that day, Sakurako's adoptive mother, Mrs. Wen, took out the white satin cheongsam that she rarely wore on weekdays and used a steam iron to smooth out the fine wrinkles, and the two lilac lotus flowers on the cheongsam set off her youthful style.
Sakura's birth mother, Aunt Qin, went to the hair salon to coil her hair, a dark red dress, showing her figure just right.
Aunt Qin has been immigrating to Switzerland for more than a decade. After the death of her husband's heart attack, she defected to her eldest daughter in Switzerland, and both the daughter and son-in-law were doctors, with a good income and a stable life.
Aunt Qin and Mrs. Wen were the same age, they had been studying in a school since childhood, and the two families were family friends, and at the age of eighteen, the two jinlans worshipped each other and became a pair of good sisters.
On this day, the home is very lively, the steaming chicken soup in the pot is making a sound, and the aroma wafts out of the kitchen. Sakurako usually does not go into the kitchen much, Mrs. Wen is heartbroken, she has worked hard to enter the university, cooking and other things in the future will not be too late to learn.
As a typical Shanghai girl, at this time she has grown slender and slender, her skin is like ivory, a pair of Dan phoenix eyes are like autumn waves, and the good temperament that has been raised since childhood is revealed between her hands and feet.
Mrs. Wen and Aunt Qin were chatting lively in the kitchen, the two had not seen each other for a long time, and many words were pouring out eagerly.
Sakurako walked to the kitchen door and looked for the pair of high heels in the shoe cabinet that had been worn once, the sliding door of the kitchen was hidden, and the whispers of the two women penetrated her ears.
Only to hear Aunt Qin say, "When are you going to tell Sakurako?" You promised me that she would say it when she was eighteen. You know I've been regretting that decision all my life. ”
Aunt Qin sighed and continued, "Now, I have found lung cancer again, and I don't know how long I can live, and this secret in my heart is pressed like a stone, stirring me day and night."
Wen Tai whispered, "I promised you, but I think that agreement is too sloppy, why do you have to tell her?" Sakurako can't stand it, she will think that I have cheated on her for so many years, she has already regarded me as a mother! The adoptive mother's tone was full of innocence.
When Aunt Qin heard this, the hand that was cutting vegetables froze in the air, and when the knife fell, the blood on her index finger had already emerged.
The family was suddenly busy, Wen Tai decided to send Aunt Qin to the hospital, the knife edge was a little deep, And Band-Aid obviously couldn't solve the problem. No one noticed Sakurako, and the conversation just now, like a nail, had been inserted straight into Sakura's heart.
She snatched the door and ran, hiding herself in a secluded corner of the community garden, tears flowing into a river.
It turned out that Gan Mom and Gan Dad were actually their own biological parents!!! They actually filled themselves for so many years!
No wonder how you look at it, you feel that you have some kind of secret connection with the Ganma family, the eldest daughter of the Ganma, who has the same Dan phoenix eyes as herself, thin and small lips, and the same slender figure.
From childhood to adulthood, the mother's eyes are full of endless concern and pity, and after going to Europe, she is more frequently WeChat contact, so that the adoptive mother can't help but eat aged vinegar several times.
02
As far as she can remember, Sakurako has been sandwiched between her two mothers, torn apart by their love. Both mothers are extremely strong people, and society has long forced them to become hidden women, although on the surface they are gentle and elegant, but inside they are women with clear ideas and strong wills.
This was also the main reason why they admired each other and worshipped each other in the early years, but later, one believed in the Buddhist culture of the East, and the other believed in the West.
Wen Tai gradually became a famous Chinese medicine doctor in Jiangnan, everything in the family is based on the Chinese way of health as the standard, what season, what to eat tonics, what soup to drink, are very exquisite, dress also follow the traditional beauty of China, quite the legacy of the old Shanghai beauty in the thirties.
Aunt Qin, on the other hand, is a highly qualified student of architecture, advocating enlightened thoughts, reading world famous works, and listening to serenades. The arrangement of the family is quite emotional, a son and a daughter have gone to the United Kingdom to study, and after graduation, both have become successful careers.
Her adoptive father has always regarded Sakurako as a pearl in his hand. He's an engineer who brings Sakurako a snack every day when he gets home, and he packs it in a rice bag to keep it warm when he gets home.
The adoptive father is skillful and good at making all kinds of toys, and on the weekend, he takes the young sakura to the Huangpu River to fly kites, the wet sea breeze blows, the clouds pile up layer by layer, the top layer is set with gold by the sunset, and the seagulls spin and fly up and down on the golden edge, like her happy heart.
At that time, there were four or five children in each family, and It was unusual for Sakurako to be the only girl in the family. Coupled with the fact that she is very tall, she has felt that she stands out from the crowd since she was a child, and does not belong to any tribe of sentient beings.
Later, as she grew up, the love of the two women for her gradually evolved into a secret competition, which made her even more miserable, and she often wanted to escape far away.
Today, she finally knows her own life, and many of the past question marks have been answered at once. She first couldn't accept it, and then she thought about the importance of giving birth to grace and nurturing grace, without giving birth to grace, where is the grace? Birth is a time, but nurturing is a lifetime. She thought of her adoptive mother's kindness to her, and she thought of her birth mother who had been silently dedicating her love, willing to be a dry mother and condescending to the back. What kind of forbearance and pain is this?
03
But Sakurako couldn't figure out why she had been given to someone else?
Later, she calmed down and asked her adoptive father, who said to her: "In 1968, when you were born, your birth mother was pulled to reform because of your grandfather's study abroad experience in the UK. At this time, your brother and sister are already teenagers, and only you are waiting for you. Your biological father came to our house with you in his arms 5 months old and begged us to give our poor child a way to live. ”
"After we got married, we never had children, so your mother said to Aunt Qin that if you give birth to the third eldest, let me be my daughter, and we will treat her well and treat her as if we were our own." At that time, a joke, which thought of a word into a slur. ”
In 1976, Aunt Qin returned, and you were already six years old. The two mothers meet: let you recognize Aunt Qin as a dry mother, and then tell you the truth when you are eighteen. The adoptive father couldn't go on, and he looked out the window and fell silent.
Later, Sakurako herself remembers that she quickly grew into a tall and beautiful girl, like a small tree in the spring. Gan Mom wanted her to study in the UK, but Sakurako didn't seem to be as good at exams as her son and daughter, she didn't get into a key high school, and from high school, she felt more and more difficult to study.
Gan Mama was very surprised, she could not accept this fact, but the adoptive mother was open-minded and optimistic, obeyed Providence in everything, and did not compete with herself, she said: "It is good to enter any university, as long as you are healthy and happy, it is a perfect life." In his heart, Wen Tai had always wanted Sakurako to leave her and run away into the distance.
04
When Sakurako was twenty-four years old, her adoptive mother had carefully drawn a blueprint for her marriage.
Many years ago, the adoptive mother recognized a dry son, although she did not take it with her, but paid a great deal of effort.
Gan's son is called Long Kai, he is white and lean, quiet and introverted, but when the two stand together, he is as tall as Sakurako. Because of his poor family, his tuition and decent clothes were provided by his mother.
Now, Sakurako finally understands why her adoptive mother has a dry son, perhaps the adoptive mother has always felt unsteady, if one day her daughter's love for her biological parents exceeds her love for herself, she still has a sustenance, not to end up alone. But it should never be, the adoptive mother should not have the intention of letting her marry Long Kai.
In Sakurako's mind, Long Kai is just an older brother, and in her fantasy, the Prince Charming comes from afar, with a mysterious atmosphere and the tall handsomeness of a northerner. In her eyes, Shanghai men are the kind of ordinary people who hang two fish on their bicycles after work and go home and make two small dishes for women to eat.
She also agrees with her birth mother, Aunt Qin, who always says: "You must not look for a Shanghai man, you must look far ahead, look for it in the world, your life is only once." Aunt Qin warned Sakurako about her eldest daughter's marriage: "The white doctor your sister is looking for, the first thing she does when she comes back from work every day is to kiss her wife and then cook. Shanghai men only look at the money under the nose, trivial, calculating, no big deal. Gan Ma dragged the Shanghai accent and said.
Sakurako doesn't know how to be good, and after all, she's afraid of marriage. She felt that the grace of marriage was different from the grace of birth, it contained the charity of lust, which was nothing less than a luxury of life, but also a gift from the lineage.
But she could not resist the arrangement of her adoptive mother, who did things, soft and rigid, often making people do what she wanted unconsciously, and sure enough, the arm did not twist over the thigh, everything happened naturally, and the family ushered in the wedding of a couple.
05
After marriage, Long Kai ran his own company, and the family's income rose sharply.
The son then arrived, bringing happiness to the small family, and Wen Tai felt that the happiness of a lifetime was complete from then on.
However, Sakurako had Aunt Qin's blood flowing through her body, and there was a voice in her bones saying that she wanted to dominate her life, go farther into the world, and live for herself.
When she returned from work this day, she plucked up enough courage to say to her husband: "The factory is going to be transformed into a state-owned enterprise, and I want to contract the woolen sweater factory." I have selected more than two dozen skilled female workers who are willing to follow me. "Before that, Sakurako was just a designer in the factory.
Long Kai saw two flames jumping in her eyes, he thought he had heard wrong, in his impression, this sister who grew up together was basically a little girl who sold matches, always needing the protection and care of others. Today, she is going to hold up the sky alone.
After several hours of discussion, the two still couldn't reach a consensus, and the man realized the fact that his wife was a very stubborn woman. Since the talks are not close, I have to let her try it first, and when she loses, she will naturally go home honestly to see the child.
The following year, the factory expanded its operations and introduced production lines from Europe, and exported its products to Japan and Europe. Sakurako hired an interpreter, and often flew abroad to accept orders, and would also stop by to visit Aunt Qin.
Everyone did not expect that Sakurako's business was getting better and better, and the profits soared all the way, blinding everyone's red eyes.
Long Kai became more and more silent, he rarely smiled later, he felt more and more ignored by his wife, his son was handed over to Wen Tai, he had to go to Wen Tai's house to eat, his own home was covered with dust, cold pot and cold stove, lifeless.
Three years passed. One summer evening, the intolerable Ryukai finally broke the silence and said to Sakurako, "If you have to do it, let's get a divorce!" In his heart, the little girl who sold matches couldn't do without him.
But Sakurako looked at him unusually calmly and said, "Leave! Son, you come and bring! She had obviously thought about the day when the two divorced without any financial disputes.
After the divorce, Sakurako put all her energy into business management, which was sixteen years, and the bittersweet and bittersweet of life were tasted by her one by one. In her best years of youth, there was no shortage of suitors, but for her, these people either came to eat melons or to play soy sauce, and she was completely unmoved.
My son is eighteen years old and is going to college in New York. Long Kai has not been married for so many years, and on the issue of his son, they will discuss it together as usual. Not only did the discussion, the family often ate at the same table at Wen Tai's house, and the neighbors who did not know thought that they were still a happy family.
After the meal, Wen Tai was busy in the kitchen, and Long Kai came over and whispered to Wen Tai, "Sakura's factory is not long gone, I will wait for her to change her mind." When he said this, he was full of confidence, as if he had a sixth sense. Wen Tai listened to her heart blossom, and she was looking forward to the return of the two of them.
Sure enough, as Long Kai expected, Sakurako's eyes began to show tears, fear of light, stinging symptoms, she rushed to the hospital for examination, the doctor said to her: "You have a serious glaucoma, almost blind, if you don't want to be blind, stop working, meditate well, maybe there will be a turnaround." ”
The doctor's words made her realize that she had to stop, or she would become a burden to her family.
So Sakurako couldn't bear to cut love, had to transfer the business to friends, settled the workers, and flew to New York herself, cooking soup for her son, and accompanied him wholeheartedly.
During these quiet days, Sakurako began to think about the first half of her life, and the more she thought about it, the more she felt indebted to everyone, especially her son. Growing up, he rarely saw his mother except for his grandmother, who was his father, and for this reason, they became increasingly estranged. Then she felt sorry for her adoptive parents, who had worked for themselves all their lives, and now that they were old, they had run away.
In this entanglement, Sakurako ushered in a winter of snowflakes. The heavy snow in New York suddenly covered the world.
The man who fell in love with Sakurako at first sight appeared, a Chinese man who grew up in England, tall, burly, polite, and had immigrated to the United States for more than twenty years, and his wife had died a few years later.
The two met for the first time at a New Year's party, talked endlessly as soon as they met, and got married after a few months together.
They traveled to get married and flew to Europe to visit their birth mother, and Aunt Qin's lung cancer was already advanced, and she said to Sakurako, "The most regrettable thing in my life is to give you to someone else." Sakurako took her in her arms and cried silently, and her birth mother, Aunt Qin, passed away in Sakura's arms.
The son graduated and returned to Shanghai to help his father run the business, Sakurako's adoptive mother, Wen Tai, is getting older, but still tough and clear-headed, although she still fantasizes about remarrying the children, but her strength is receding little by little, she has become softer and softer, and this change makes Sakurako feel painful.
Whenever Aunt Qin died, Wen Tai would reverently burn three incense sticks, and in the smoke of her head, she would burst into tears.
The drizzle outside the window is falling silently, and it is another rainy season.