I have seen such a sentence: "The greatest stupidity of human nature is self-righteousness; the greatest failure of being a human being is arrogance." ”
Although the words are heartfelt, they are golden and good words.
In life, there are always some people who like to look down on others and overestimate themselves.
However, being too self-righteous will end up digging a hole for yourself.
There is such a person, they think they are very capable, like to pick other people's faults, never find their own shortcomings.
The habit of attributing the success of others to good luck, the failure of others to poor ability, and firmly believing that what they cannot achieve, others are out of reach.
Underestimating the strength of others can only expose the limitations of their own cognition and be punched in the face by facts.
In the late Qing Dynasty, Zuo Zongtang was a highly skilled chess player, and his subordinates were willing to bow to the wind, so he was full of self-confidence.
Once, he was ordered to go to Xinjiang to seek revenge, passing by a hut, only to see a large banner hanging outside the hut, and the words "the world's first chess king" were written impressively.
Zuo Zongtang was not convinced, dismounted on the spot, and played three games with the owner of the hut.
In a few moments, he won three rounds for the old man.
Zuo Zongtang said smugly, "You can remove this plaque!"
After saying that, he took away the big flag.
Later, Zuo Zongtang passed by here again, still seeing the plaque of "the world's first chess player", and suddenly felt that the old man was a trickster who wanted to defeat his prestige.
So, he went in to play chess with the old man again, but this time he lost five or six games in a row, and he was beaten without the ability to fight back, and he lost face.
Zuo Zongtang was puzzled.
The old man said:
If I win, you will dampen your vigor; now that you are triumphant, and you are restraining your pride, I do not need to let you go anymore.
Someone said, "When you look down on others, you're not far from failure." ”
Because of a little achievement, the sense of self-confidence is bursting, the arrogance is overbearing, and you can only expose your ignorance.
As a person, don't underestimate others, and don't easily draw conclusions about anyone, because everyone will have advantages and strengths that you can't imagine.
There is a saying that a match can also ignite a forest; without two dollars a bag of salt, even the tallest meal will be tasteless.
With a reverential heart, facing up to the merits of others, and maintaining a humble attitude at all times, you can let yourself go farther.
Psychologist Dunning conducted a series of experiments that asked psychology undergraduates to estimate their own scores, as well as their performance relative to others.
As a result, the students with the lowest scores overestimated their grades the most; the students at the bottom of the scores thought their skills were superior to those of the other 2/3.
The group with the highest scores underestimates their performance.
This is known as the Duck Effect.
People with insufficient abilities are often immersed in self-created advantages and cannot objectively evaluate their abilities.
I have seen a fable about a donkey living in a temple.
One day, the monks took it down the mountain, and on the way back, people reverently knelt on both sides to worship it, and the donkey could not help but flutter.
When a pedestrian passes by, it stops on its toes in the middle of the road and accepts worship with peace of mind.
When it returned to the temple, it refused to work anymore, and the monks had to let it down the mountain.
Halfway up the mountain, the donkey saw a group of people, beating gongs and drums to meet them, and he thought that people must have come to greet them, so he walked to the middle of the road with a big wave.
Who knew that it was a welcoming procession, blocked by the donkey, and the people were furious and clubbed at it, and the donkey was already dying when he fled back to the temple.
It laments the sinisterness of people's hearts, but it does not know that it is not it that people have bowed down before, but the Buddha statue on its back.
This is like some people we meet who don't understand the situation, overestimate their abilities, and end up behaving against themselves.
The poet Lu Quan famously said: "Still think of yourself as dirt, always think of yourself as a pearl, and there is always the pain of being buried." ”
In the words of a netizen, he said: "I never dare to ask for leave, not because I love my job and dedicate myself, but I am afraid that after taking leave, the boss will find that the company has me and I am the same." ”
In fact, everyone is not irreplaceable.
Truly intelligent people don't get caught up in an illusory sense of superiority and overestimate their importance.
On the contrary, they dare to look directly at their own smallness, and work hard to make themselves more stable.
There is a saying: "The more incompetent people are, the more they look down on people; the more capable people are, the more they will respect others." ”
If you can see through yourself, you will not look down on others; if you can find the strengths of others, you can make up for your own shortcomings.
Ye Tianshi, a famous physician in the Qing Dynasty, was highly skilled in medicine, and people respected him.
Surrounded by a huge vanity, he gradually became arrogant and looked down on his peers, especially Xue Xue, because the two had different medical views.
Once, Ye Tianshi's mother fell ill, high fever and sweating, dry mouth, he prescribed several prescriptions, and his mother still did not work after taking it.
He was helpless and impatient.
Xue Xue heard about this incident, regardless of the previous suspicions, prescribed the right medicine and cured Ye Tianshi's mother's illness.
Ye Tianshi felt ashamed that he was inferior to Xue Xue, took the initiative to visit him, and humbly asked him for advice, and the two became close friends.
Since then, Ye Tianshi has understood the truth that there are people in heaven and man outside the heavens, and he has searched for famous doctors in the world, studied hard, and became the first doctor in the real Jiangnan.
The Tao Te Ching has a cloud: "Those who know others are wise, and those who know themselves are wise." ”
Knowing others can only be regarded as smart; having a transparent understanding of oneself is truly great wisdom.
Because it is often not others who are holding back the progress, but oneself.
The oracle said that Socrates was the wisest man in Athens, but Socrates himself did not think so, so he tested this statement.
He visited Athens and talked and debated with many recognized intelligent people, but found that these so-called intelligent people were pretentious and never admitted that they were deficient.
Socrates was knowledgeable, and he was able to clearly recognize his own shortcomings and learn from others with an open mind, which is why the oracle said he was wise.
Tagore said: "The easiest thing in the world is to blame others; the hardest thing to do is to recognize yourself." ”
Truly capable people are not arrogant, will not be blindly confident, and will not easily deny themselves.
There is the knowledge of others, and there is more self-knowledge.
Take the strengths of others to make up for your weaknesses, constantly cultivate yourself, and constantly surpass yourself.
The more people who understand, the more they feel ignorant; the less people who understand, the more they can't figure out their own weight.
What people fear most is being too self-righteous.
Psychologist Jung said: "People who look outward are dreaming, and people who look inward are awake." ”
To be a human being, not to underestimate others is cultivation, and not to overestimate oneself as a cultivator.
Knowing how to converge on the edge, lower the posture, and see the world with an equal and peaceful attitude is the wisest approach.
Only by seeing the advantages of others and seeing their own shortcomings can we find our own positioning, control the direction of progress, and meet a better self.
Author | Xu Xiaoxu swallowed the fireworks and pretended to be a literary fan.
Image | Visual China