These two days, the author chased a variety show to watch male stars do housework, I thought that male stars doing housework would be a bit funny, but I didn't expect to be almost "angry to death", the detailed reason has to start from the "emperor" Nie Yuan, who became popular because of "Yanxi Raiders".
In the new phase of housework men, Nie Yuan and his wife Qin Ziyue made their debut and became a newly settled star family.
I thought that in the face of the camera, Nie Yuan would more or less show that he loved his wife, but he didn't expect that after an episode of the show, in addition to being full of slots, the author really didn't see his half-hearted love for Qin Ziyue.
First of all, before the official recording of the show, the two had a small dispute over a piece of clothing - Qin Ziyue felt that it was a recording program, deliberately put on a light makeup, and wore a dress that could be tied with a bow.
Unexpectedly, this small change made Nie Yuan very dissatisfied, and directly asked Qin Ziyue not to dress up deliberately. Qin Ziyue had no choice but to compromise and silently changed out of the clothes that Nie Yuan didn't like.
Qin Ziyue explained to the staff that it may be that he is usually too busy, taking care of his husband and family, and has no time to dress himself, which has caused his husband to get used to his appearance of not wearing makeup, and now suddenly dressing up will make his husband feel a little deliberate, so that he is disgusted.
When asked "husband, daughter, career, in your heart of the value of the order is what", Qin Ziyue replied without hesitation, as a wife, he gave himself 120 points. When it comes to his daughter, Qin Ziyue feels a little guilty, thinking that he has only achieved 59 points and is not yet a qualified mother.
I can spend too little time with my daughter, and most of my time is spent taking care of my husband and family: "I think I have taken good care of my home and done a good job in the rear, so that my husband can work hard in the front." ”
When asked about his parents, Qin Zi was more ashamed and tearful, feeling that he was not a qualified daughter, and only gave himself 30 points at most. Because it has always been the parents who have been paying, they have abandoned their lives and time for Qin Ziyue, and have come to help their daughter take care of her son-in-law and her family.
After speaking, Qin Ziyue shed tears of guilt.
Nie Yuan, who was on the side, did not comfort his wife after seeing it, but taught her after the interview, "Don't have emotions, there is no need." ”
This scene made the guests in the observation room can't help but spit on each other: on the one hand, let the wife not deliberately change herself for the show and maintain her true self; on the other hand, she did not let the wife show real emotions, and felt that it was unnecessary to show real emotions in front of the camera. It's so contradictory.
Guest Dong Youlin couldn't help but carefully ask Qin Ziyue if he was afraid of Nie Yuan. Qin Ziyue was stunned for a moment, and responded respectfully, "I think it is respect", and then explained that because the husband is the head of the family, as a wife, she should accommodate him and tolerate him.
Perhaps it was with this mentality of male superiority and female inferiority, and the head of the family needed to be accommodated and tolerated, Qin Ziyue and his parents gradually lost themselves and became the courtiers and servants of "Emperor" Nie Yuan.
Secondly, Nie Yuan's attitude towards his parents-in-law and wife, the author does not see the slightest respect.
After the program was officially recorded, perhaps it was rare to see the son-in-law at home, so Nie Yuan's parents-in-law began to work early in the morning, specially making a large table of hearty dishes, waiting for the son-in-law to get up and eat breakfast.
Unexpectedly, from morning to 1 p.m., Nie Yuan finally woke up slowly in Qin Ziyue's three urgings and four invitations and went downstairs to eat.
At this time, the mother-in-law also cared for the first time whether the son-in-law drank honey water after getting up. When Nie Yuan learned that his parents-in-law and wife had been waiting for him to eat breakfast, he only replied, "Don't wait in the future, what is good to wait for, eat when you are hungry." ”
Then, at the dinner table, nie yuan in addition to learning more about her daughter's whereabouts from Qin Zi, that is, counting Qin Zi,the more she loved to eat snacks, educating her that there were more snack additives such as potato chips, so that she could eat less.
Unexpectedly, when his daughter came home from school in the afternoon, Nie Yuan immediately changed into a different face, not only transformed into a daughter slave, but also took the initiative to take out potato chips to please her daughter... It's just a face punch to the face on the spot, a large double standard.
Nie Yuan's double standard for his wife and daughter is also reflected in the fact that no matter what Qin Ziyue said to him, he was a look of indifference on his face, and Qin Ziyue did not dare to take the initiative to ask him to do housework.
So during the day, her daughter was not at home, and after lunch, Nie Yuan waved a big hand and went out to find a partner to play football. Leaving Qin Ziyue and his mother-in-law silently cleaning up the dishes, cleaning the kitchen, tidying up the room, and serving the pets.
For his daughter's request, Nie Yuan acted responsive. Not only did he happily agree when his daughter suggested that he go to wash the dishes, but he also took the initiative to cut fruit for his daughter to eat.
Seeing this scene, the author only wants to sigh: Man, obviously his wife is also the daughter of someone else's family, why wouldn't he think about it in a different position and treat other people's daughters well? If his daughter grew up to become a woman like his wife, he would take the whole family to serve his son-in-law, I don't know how he would feel?
It is said that the influence of the original family on the child is crucial, the author believes that Nie Yuan's daughter has long seen the humble gesture of her mother in front of her father, and when she grows up, she will become a girl who is the same as her mother and identifies with male superiority and female inferiority.
In fact, Qin Ziyue's mentality is not the mentality of many married women? Most Chinese women have been educated since childhood that "a woman's ultimate destination is the family, and a woman's most important responsibility is to teach her husband and children."
So many women, even if they are fortunate enough to succeed in school and have a good job, will choose to return to the family after getting married and having children, and when the woman behind the man, everything is based on the partner and the family first.
Writing this, the author suddenly remembered a post on a forum: a blogger went to the maternity examination because she was pregnant, was pulled into a group of pregnant women, but unexpectedly heard a lot of ideas that ruined the three views inside.
At the beginning, these pregnant women discussed issues such as pregnancy reactions in the group, but they did not expect to chat about the painting style but gradually deviated. A pregnant woman lamented that she was unwell after pregnancy and could not perform the ritual of weekly public service with her husband, and felt very sorry for her husband.
Unexpectedly, this sentence has resonated with many pregnant women in the group, and some people have said "Yes, men are too hard, after giving birth, they must compensate their husbands well", "It doesn't matter if you pay attention to it once in a while, men can't bear it.".
What's more, he actually said that "after pregnancy, my husband was forced to completely abstinence, and he felt very distressed, so he was very supportive to go outside to solve it, sometimes it was really uncomfortable to see him endure, and I also thought about helping him find Xiao San"...
I have to say that the real thoughts of these wives during pregnancy are also too shocking. Others think that pregnant women are most concerned about how to protect the fetus, maintain a good mood and sleep, but they did not expect that these pregnant women in the above group only wanted to hurt their husbands, and even took the initiative to help their husbands find Xiao San, just to solve the physical needs of their husbands.
In their eyes, the husband is definitely the first in line, even if they are pregnant, the body is suffering from a lot of discomfort, their first consideration is still the husband's feelings.
Their pregnancy anxiety made the author understand why Qin Ziyue was humble - they all valued their husbands too much and ignored themselves.
Seeing a scene, the author feels both heartache and disappointment - heartbroken their selflessness, only remembering the identity of the wife, thinking about the husband wholeheartedly, but ignoring their own feelings; disappointed by their ignorance, if a man can not even bear the physiological impulse of his wife during pregnancy, how is it worth it for a woman to risk her life to have children for him?
Although many people say that men are the head of the family, modern women can also support themselves by their own ability, and do not need to look at men's faces to eat.
So, if that man is difficult to serve and does not know how to give you respect and gratitude, why do you still have to serve and endure?
The author especially likes the blessing of others when the newlyweds do the happy event, "raise the eyebrows of the case, the white head to the old", and feel that a good marriage should be like the expression of these 8 words, the husband and wife respect each other, and do not need anyone to be wronged and complete, they can support each other to the white head.
Husband and wife are people who want to go through a lifetime together, if they can't understand each other and respect each other, why talk about growing old with a blank head?
I hope that whether it is Qin Ziyue or those pregnant mothers who love to think wildly, they can take good care of themselves and love themselves well.
Because a person does not even love himself, what is the point of loving others?
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This article is original by Asahi Speaking Heart Language, welcome to pay attention, look forward to sharing with you baiwei life.