Compared with pseudo-self-discipline, the most feared thing in life is actually self-consumption. This consumption does not come from the outside, but more from oneself, that is, the source of constantly reducing one's inner feelings is mainly from oneself.
Such feelings will make us feel that no matter what we do, we are meaningless, no matter what we do, we are inferior to others, and we will even question what we are doing in this world.
As a result, the life that should be a happy life is filled with a gloomy atmosphere, which is not the state we should have.
Our life should be colorful, it should be wanton, even if we have reached the age of forty, we should be full of ambition, striving for our ideals, and working hard for our own happiness.
If we spend most of our lives in negative emotions, then we are not worth it.
Psychological research has shown that women reach middle age, refuse to consume, and please live a "low desire" life.
Desire becomes a shackle that binds one's happiness
TV series "Know it or not. Xiao Qin in "Know It or Not" has always hoped that her son can inherit the title, but her son is not that piece of material at all.
In order to let his son get the knighthood, Xiao Qin was forced to wear a mask and did not live like himself for a day.
The saddest thing is that her son is not rare at all, and it is only Xiao Qin's own fault from beginning to end.
If there were not so many desires, Xiao Qin would be a good wife, a good mother, and would also enjoy the happiness of the world, instead of trying to live a lifetime like this, and in the end nothing would fall.
Having desire is a good thing, it can be a driving force for people to move forward, but if desire is excessive, it will become a shackle that will bind our happiness.
After watching an interview with Liu Jialing, the host asked her: "Which age do you think is your happiest and happiest day?" ”
She said: "It's now, it's the present. ”
Coming is accidental, going is inevitable, gain and loss is a common thing, it is good to treat it with a normal mind, it is good to go with nature, and some things, forced and forced, are just to increase their own suffering.
Therefore, calm your own mentality, adjust your emotions, reject internal friction, enjoy the present, minimalist life, and meet the most basic material needs.
That's enough.
Live with subtraction and be happy with addition
Stella in the TV series "Perfect Relationship" is a model of successful women, her body is bumpy, her skin is firm and elastic, her posture is straight, and her temperament is outstanding.
In the workplace, she is decisive and fierce;
In the love field, she is calm and heavy, not dragging mud and water.
When she learned that her husband had betrayed her, Stella did not hesitate and immediately collected evidence to let the other party out of the house.
Many people want to be like Stella, and in real life, Stella's actor Chen Shu is also such a person, self-disciplined, fulfilling, minimalist.
In an interview, Chen Shu said that he liked the way he was.
Because in her opinion, her mentality is very good, when filming, she will shoot well, take a serious rest when she is not filming, relax and moderate, and do not pursue other things.
As we begin to age, there is a light that we can actually create ourselves, and that light is what we can get by streamlining our lives.
Over the years, Chen Shu has never given up on self-requirements for herself, nor has she given up the pursuit of beauty, in her opinion, age is really not the most important thing, a good life is.
Yishu said: "Life is only a few decades, the most important thing is to satisfy yourself, not to please others."
And we should also take back all the time emotions, be keen to make ourselves happy, and be keen to live with subtraction.
The key to reducing desire lies in reconciling with yourself
Zeng Guofan said: "The reason why people are impetuous, hypocritical, and depressed is because they have selfish intentions and get rid of excessive selfish desires, so as to achieve the realm of "sincerity", and then stop their mental internal friction and reconcile with themselves." ”
It is true that some people feel that they are still ordinary employees at the age of forty and want to do a big career in a confused year;
Some people feel that they are old and have wrinkles, and they begin to have facial anxiety, just thinking of lightening their wrinkles through skin care products;
Some people feel that their marriage should be good, and the closer the feelings between husband and wife, the better, otherwise they will be separated from their expectations.
As everyone knows, these desires are just forcing, and the things that are deliberately obtained will not last long, and it is likely to bring about the regurgitation of negative emotions.
Life, old age, illness and death are the norm of life, marriage is not the more intimate the better, sometimes, the appropriate cold can achieve warmth.
Sometimes, blandness is the truth.
You see, we have a lot of happiness, we should enjoy it, happiness is not to focus on what you have, but to see more of what you have. In this way, our lives will have a lot of happiness.