Time is like a great spectator who examines all relations of events with the most rational attitude. Or great and sweet, or humble and cold, everything cannot escape the eyes of time.
Many people have consumed half of life before they understand it, and some people have squandered it before they understand what love is.
Such a story was told on the emotional show "Speak Up" in 2017.
Love that begins in the green years
There was a girl named Qingqing. Just like her name, the green years are full of sunshine and vitality.
Heaven's favor for Qingqing was so generous that he sent her a boy named Lin Xu in her sophomore year.
In Qingqing's eyes, Lin Xu is a boy who is excellent and self-motivated, although Lin Xu's appearance is average, and his family is not very solid, but the potential that can be seen in this boy is unlimited.
The wonderful thing is that while Qingqing has a good feeling for Lin Xu, Lin Xu also has a love for Qingqing.
Young, allowing the hot feelings to heat up as quickly as possible, the two held hands for the first time on campus and confirmed each other's love relationship.
At this time, they may still be ignorant and not prepared for the upcoming life, but the two people who are deeply in love firmly believe in one thing, and in the future, the two will be able to walk hand in hand through life.
The time of the university passed in a hurry, and Qingqing and Lin Xuhe became "a pair" of workers.
The two who had just left school were living on a shoestring, and they took a very meager internship salary every month to maintain their basic livelihood.
In order to be able to gain a foothold in the big city, the two rented a small cottage. However, this small cottage cost most of the living expenses of the two people.
After removing the water and electricity of the house, the balance left by the two men was less than two hundred dollars.
Qingqing never thought that life would be so difficult after leaving the school gate, and she did not realize the hardships of beating workers when she was in school before.
Qingqing didn't seem to be ready for what was happening in front of him. Contrary to Qingqing, Lin Xu was very optimistic about the dilemma in front of him.
Although he only had less than two hundred yuan in living expenses, he was also convinced that the future would be better, as long as he could be with Qingqing.
On August 15, 2011, the two men went to the supermarket with only one hundred yuan left, and when they came out, they only had two bags of instant noodles and a mooncake bought in the special price area.
In the evening, after enjoying the "big meal" of the Mid-Autumn Festival, Lin Xu and Qingqing split the mooncake in two, and the two held the cut mooncake while embracing the full moon in the sky.
Falling asleep at night, there is no air conditioning or fan in the rented house, Lin Xu uses a fan to cool Qingqing, which is one of the few romances that Lin Xu can give.
Poverty did not make this boy lose the care of his sweetheart, he could not give Qingqing too much, but expressed his love in the most simple way. Lin Xu firmly believed that Qingqing was also the same as himself, and even in this most difficult day, he would definitely be able to see the future of the two of them. So Lin Xu proposed to Qingqing.
Frustrated, three marriage proposals were rejected
But what Lin Xu did not expect was that when he proposed to Qingqing, Qingqing hesitated. Qingqing told Lin Xu that the two were in such poor condition that they didn't even have the money to entertain their relatives and friends. If they even had to borrow money from their parents for their drinking, the two would be too bad.
After listening to Qingqing's words, Lin Xu felt that Qingqing was in charge, so he promised Qingqing and married after the two of them had improved their economic strength.
Lin Xu worked conscientiously and worked hard, and soon got the approval of the leaders in the unit. Economic conditions have also improved with increased capacity.
In just one year, Lin Xu had saved enough money to be able to entertain relatives and friends and hold a simple wedding.
So in 2012, Lin Xu proposed to Qingqing again. Lin Xu believed that this time he would be able to succeed and be able to get the affirmation of his lover.
But in the end, Lin Xu failed again. Qingqing told Lin Xu that the two are still renting a house, and their parents hope that the two can have a suite, and when Qingqing's parents come to visit them after marriage, they can also have a place to stay.
After listening to Qingqing's words, Lin Xu was a little disappointed, but he still felt that Qingqing was in charge. Moreover, this year, both of them are not old enough, and they can fight for two more years.
The sense of loss of the failed marriage proposal again did not have much impact on Lin Xu, and the open-minded Lin Xu quickly put aside his negative emotions and inspired himself to re-devote himself to his work with his vision of the future. Lin Xu spent another whole year saving a sum of money to buy a house.
In 2013, Lin Xu worked hard in Beijing for three years, and finally had his own house with the help of his family.
Lin Xu, like countless young people working in big cities, has placed his hopes for the future on these tens of square meters of reinforced concrete.
Because of these tens of square meters of reinforced concrete, he can give his lover a warm home. Although Lin Xu did not know that he could pay off the loan in time, the future of himself and Qingqing seemed to be lightly touched with both hands at this moment.
On the day he got the real estate certificate, Lin Xu hurriedly proposed to Qingqing again. This was the third year after they graduated, and it was also Lin Xu's third marriage proposal. However, the results that Lin Xu expected did not appear, and Qingqing told Lin Xu that her parents asked him to prepare the "three golds" for marriage and a dowry.
Lin Xu had accumulated some before and after, these things and the bride price were ready, and there were hundreds of thousands.
After three years of hard work, Lin Xu has a house of his own, but this small house has exhausted all the savings in Lin Xu's hands, plus he has to repay the loan every month, and there is very little left, and these hundreds of thousands of dollars will be able to accumulate in what year and month?
Thinking of this, Lin Xu was angry with Qingqing for the first time, but Qingqing didn't seem to realize his problem. After some argument, the two men gave in one step at a time.
Qingqing seemed to have won the victory, and Lin Xu also returned to his previous state and continued to work hard. But what Qingqing didn't know was that this man, who was not good at expressing himself, had planted the seeds of disappointment in his heart.
Drifting apart, the harsh demand for love crushed the lovers who once loved each other deeply
In fact, who can not be disappointed in such a thing? Although Lin Xu is still young and can continue to fight, successive marriage proposal failures have deeply stung this man's heart.
Lin Xu once again returned to the state of desperate work after adjusting his mentality, only this time Lin Xu no longer worked hard with hope like the previous two times, but only used work as a vent, struggling in the effort of not seeing the future.
I don't know when it started, the relationship between Lin Xu and Qingqing gradually became estranged. Lin Xu no longer told Qingqing about the troubles encountered in his work, and locked everything in his heart.
And for some small frictions with Qingqing at home, he also adopted an extremely gentle attitude to accommodate them one by one.
Lin Xu no longer spoke to Qingqing in his heart, and Qingqing seemed to realize something. Looking at Lin Xu, who was gradually on the right track in his career, Qingqing had a suspicion in his heart. She began to believe that Lin Xu, who had a successful career, must have someone outside. So Qingqing began his own plan.
Qingqing began to send messages to Lin Xu one after another every day, asking Lin Xu not to reply less than ten words per reply, and it must be a second return.
As long as Lin Xu replied slightly late, Qingqing would immediately dial Lin Xu's phone and ask what the other party was doing, why not reply to his message.
Such doubts and oppression made Lin Xu feel unable to breathe, and even had the idea of wanting to avoid.
In 2015, Lin Xu traveled from Beijing to Chifeng on a business trip, and before leaving, Qingqing repeatedly instructed that after arriving there, he must reply to his message in time, and Lin Xu also agreed to come down.
In fact, Lin Xu only wants to have a period of time of his own, in the next two years of getting along with Qingqing, because of the disappointment in the future, Lin Xu does not know how to face this lover who has been with him for 6 years.
After arriving at Chifeng, Qingqing would send a message to Lin Xu almost every hour or two, asking about the other party's situation, and Lin Xu would not say anything else after a simple reply.
For Lin Xu's attitude, Qingqing just felt that Lin Xu had changed, but he didn't know why Lin Xu had become like this, and she suspected that Lin Xu had someone else outside.
On the second day of Lin Xu's business trip, when he pushed open the door of his hotel, he found Qingqing sitting outside his room door.
Qingqing told Lin Xu that he had spent more than 2,000 yuan on taxi fares, and that he had come to find Lin Xu from home. But as soon as they met, Qingqing's first words were to ask Lin Xu, "Why don't you return my phone?" ”
In the face of Qingqing's step-by-step pressing, Lin Xu was speechless for a moment, but felt that Qingqing had completely squeezed his private space.
After the business trip, the two returned home, Qingqing's suspicions grew, and began to point the spearhead of suspicion at Lin Xu's colleagues.
In 2016, after an argument with Lin Xu, Qingqing seized the emotions and chatted with a female colleague named Xiao Zhou on WeChat, so she turned all her suspicions into torture of Lin Xu, forcing Lin Xu to admit that there was something between her and Xiao Zhou.
In fact, the relationship between Lin Xu and Xiao Zhou is just a simple colleague relationship, but in Qingqing's endless noisy and questioning for several days, Lin Xu can only admit to having a private affair with Xiao Zhou.
While saying that he had a "private affair" with Xiao Zhou, Lin Xu also put forward a request to break up with Qingqing.
Overwhelmed "escape"
In the face of Lin Xu's sudden request to break up, Qingqing was completely flustered, seven years of love, and finally had to come to this step?
At this time, Qingqing only wanted to desperately keep Lin Xu, but Qingqing's subsequent approach was to push Lin Xu further.
Lin Xu left, originally just wanting to avoid Qingqing so that he could find an opportunity to catch his breath in the increasingly tense relationship between the two. However, Qingqing pestered Lin Xu unforgivingly, and from time to time went to Lin Xu's new residence to check, and even found Xiao Zhou to warn the other party not to entangle Lin Xu.
Qingqing's tight steps did not make Lin Xu turn back, and Lin Xu finally made up his mind to leave Qingqing. In desperation, Qingqing turned to Chongqing Satellite TV's TV program "Speak Out Loud". And in the show, he expressed the idea of marrying Lin Xu.
Irretrievable love
In 2017, when Lin Xu and Qingqing came on the show and told all the things that happened between the two in the past 7 years, several guest teachers also reconciled the contradictions between Lin Xu and Qingqing. Teacher Tu Lei pointedly pointed out the problems that Qingqing had in this relationship.
Although all the teachers have made every effort to try to mediate the contradictions between Qingqing and Lin Xu, Lin Xu, who has been rejected after three marriage proposals, is already extremely disappointed in the future of the two at this time, coupled with Qingqing's unreasonable quarrels in the following two years, Lin Xu finally gave up his future with Qingqing and chose to leave the program venue alone.
Qingqing is like the fisherman's wife in Pushkin's fairy tale "The Fisherman and the Goldfish". He always wants more from his husband, but eventually loses everything because of his own desires.
The repeated escalation of marriage requirements has made his lover bear too much pressure that should not belong to him and this relationship.
And when there is a problem with feelings, Qingqing has never reflected on her own problems, always blindly looking for reasons in the other party, and even imagining a false third party when there is no reason.
Qingqing's emotional tragedy is not uncommon, and her emotional entanglement with Lin Xu is like a realistic version of "Chinese Divorce".
In real life, the practice of Jackie Chan is not uncommon, and it is also considered by many people to be a "rational" approach.
In the face of the huge survival pressure of life, more people will transform their expectations of life into expectations of marriage. There is nothing wrong with this approach, but the mistake is that these thoughts, which are called "rational", exceed the boundaries of perceptual emotions.
Outside of the so-called "rational" choices, there is always a margin, and the outside of the margin is people's emotions. When the two were living in distress, Lin Xu gave his sweetheart the simplest romance in the most simple way.
However, Qingqing, who thought she was smart, always turned a blind eye to these things, and stared at only those "conditions" necessary for marriage.
And when Lin Xu's career was successful, Qingqing, who had been in the same place, felt Lin Xu's gradually cooling heart, so he wanted to trap Lin Xu.
Even so, Qingqing still did not look for problems from his own body, but blindly believed that Lin Xu had a third party outside, turning the fantasy crisis into a living reality.
At the end of the current "Speak Out Loud" program, Lin Xu chose to leave alone.
If the failure of Qingqing's emotions is completely attributed to this girl's worship of gold and her love of vanity. Personally, I think this is unfair.
Qingqing's problem is more to turn his requirements for the future into a requirement for love, Qingqing added a lot of unnecessary bags to the love between himself and Lin Xu, and these bags that seem to be taken for granted are the unbearable weight that crushes the two.