In life, we often hear such exclamations: those around me who are worse than me are married, and I am still a "single dog", compared with them, I still can't figure out where I lost?
There is no answer to this question in itself, because everyone's love is not comparable, just as we cannot replicate the success of others. Love is a chemical change produced by the emotional interaction between two opposite sexes. This has little to do with whether the individual is excellent or not.
I just finished reading Jamaican Hotel last week, a foreign novel whose core content is about the love story of young people, and this story can be used to answer the question of some people wanting to get rid of "singleness" and can't find a partner.
01, the first encounter, like a person to boldly go to talk to her
Mary Yellen, the heroine of the novel "Jamaica Inn", is the child of a single-parent family. The father died early, and the mother single-handedly raised her daughter as an adult. Unfortunately, due to years of hard work, Mary's mother became ill with overwork and finally left Mary early.
Before dying, the mother did not trust her daughter to live alone. He instructs 17-year-old Mary to join her aunt, the Jamaica Hotel, the novel's focal landmark. The owner of this hostel is Joss. Merlin was a notorious drunkard in the area, not only often beating his wife, but also grumpy and fierce to people. So the "Jamaican Inn", and therefore no business.
Although Mary is a 17-year-old girl, she inherits her mother's strength and bravery. In the face of the "fierce and vicious" uncle, she did not show fear and timidity, but bravely fought back against the uncle. Just as Mary racked her brains to think about how to reverse the current inferior situation, the male protagonist of the novel appeared, that is, her uncle Joss. Merlin's younger brother.
The men of the Merlin family all have one thing in common, which is savagery and brutality. Moreover, the Merlin family is also a family of crimes, and Joss's father and grandfather were hanged by the local sheriff for crime. Now Joss and his brother Jem are also completely "evil people" in the local area, so Mary does not have any good feelings for the men of the Merlin family.
Joss's younger brother, Jem, is in love with Mary, who is covered in thorns, and cannot be approached. At this time, if it is a person with a slightly thinner face, it will definitely be difficult to retreat. Why?
First of all: the history of the Merlin family left a bad impression on Mary. This is a very bad disadvantage for Jem.
Second: Jem has been stealing horses in the local area and will face legal punishment if he is discovered. Mary, on the other hand, is a kind-hearted and faith-believing person, so she will certainly not accept Jem's love.
Faced with such a disadvantageous condition, let's take a look at how Jem did it.
Step 1: Take the initiative to talk, confess your identity, and cheekily "sell" mary the pony she stole. Whether Mary wants to buy a horse or not, it doesn't matter to Jem. The key point is this: Jem introduces himself to Mary.
Step 2: Invite Mary to go with her. Jem was well aware of the dangers of the Jamaican Hotel and worried about Mary's safety, and even though he knew that the other party would reject him, he still cheekily invited Mary to leave with him and told Mary his address.
02, emotional warming, honesty with each other, will open the door to each other's inner emotions
Mary and Jem's first encounter can be said to be unhappy. And Jem left Mary with the impression that although she was a hateful horse thief, she was very honest, and Jem did not deliberately hide himself.
As the storyline progresses, a second important character emerges, and that is the priest Ferencis. David. This man is ostensibly a priest, but in fact the leading big brother of a group of criminals. If Mary hadn't gone to the Jamaican Inn, perhaps the secrets of the hotel would have gone untold. It is precisely because of Mary's appearance that the "calm" of the Jamaican Hotel is broken.
Mary witnesses her uncle's murder at the Jamaica Hotel and breaks down and runs away. On the way, he meets the priest David, who is impressed by Mary's simplicity and kindness. But as the boss behind the Jamaican Inn, it was impossible for Mary to go to the sheriff to report the fact that her uncle had committed murder. But the pastor couldn't bear to lose his mouth, so David, cloaked in the "mantle" of God, and Mary became "friends" who talked about everything.
When Mary tried to talk to the priest for the second time, she suddenly got lost. Coincidentally, Mary meets jem, the guy she hates. merlin.
This encounter, for Jem, must have been a joy from heaven. Constantly exporting her family's history in front of Mary, so that Mary can understand the Merlin family more deeply. Although Jem and Joss are brothers, the two brothers take different paths. Joss is on a bloody road of no return, while Jem lives the life of a horse thief.
Jem showed his truest self in front of Mary, without the slightest disguise or disguise. In love, honesty is a very important factor. It was because of this that Mary changed her mind about Jem. So when Jem invited Mary to accompany him to "sell the stolen goods", Mary involuntarily invited him to go.
In real life, when we get along with the opposite sex, can we make each other feel good about ourselves? It doesn't depend on how good your material conditions are, it depends on whether your people are honest or not. Because in the atmosphere of honesty and honesty, each other can unload their inner defenses and enter a state of emotional interaction.
Although Jem is a horse thief, he shows a frank state in front of Mary. It is precisely because of this state of reality that it has left an unforgettable mark in Mary's heart.
03, careful "bad boys", always make it difficult for girls to forget
Although the men of the Merlin family are completely bastards, they also have excellent points. With Jem. Merlin's words: The women of Merlin's family love their husbands very much, which is confirmed by both Joss and Jem.
Mary's uncle, Joss, was grumpy and often drunk. But Mary's aunt did not abandon him, even to the death. Joss's death was related to his own path of no return, and he deserved it. But when Mary is in danger, Joss does not hurt Mary, and even protects Mary in a rough way. From this, we can see that Joss is a thick and thin man, and he is protecting his family in the most brutal and brutal way.
In summary: love is the process of emotional interaction between two opposite sexes, as long as we are honest with each other and warm each other with practical actions, the arrival of love is only a matter of time. The male protagonist in "Jamaica Inn", Jem. Merlin set a very good example for us.