Talk and stay in Germany, do things and pay attention, and be a person to stay the way

In "Dream of the Red Chamber", it is said: "Everything in the world is learned, and the cultivation of human feelings is an article." ”

Halfway up the slope of life, I saw all the cold and warm in the world, and experienced a variety of changes in the world, and then I suddenly woke up to some ways of dealing with the world.

Mature people understand that it is the wisdom of life to speak and stay moral, to do things and pay attention, and to be a person and leave a way.

01

Speak to the german, the words to the mouth to leave three points

The writer Li Shanglong once said: "No matter how good a friend is, he can't stand your excessive bluntness." When you speak, turn a corner, don't take your mouth as an atmosphere, it's just childish. ”

There are always some people who have a good relationship and laugh at others at will, without knowing the measure.

However, being straightforward does not mean being blunt, and being straight and fast does not mean being unobstructed.

Only by not saying enough can people get along comfortably.

I've seen such a story.

Last month, Haoyuan attended a class reunion for the fifth anniversary of college graduation.

Between the cups and cups, everyone talked and laughed. At this time, the sharp-eyed Ouyang found that the clothes worn by Haoyuan were often worn by him during his college years, and he made a joke:

"That will make you cry poor for the sake of scholarships, and a dress will be worn for a long time." Five years after graduation, you don't need to wear this outfit today, right? ”

As soon as this word came out, the action in Hao Yuan's hand was a meal, and the lively party was instantly embarrassed.

Fortunately, the squad leader reacted quickly, and quickly came out to play a round field and said:

"This shows that Haoyuan is in good shape, and the clothes I bought last year can't be worn this year." My wife used to complain that I was too expensive with my clothes. ”

The students next to him also reacted at this time, and asked Hao Yuan one after another:

"If you have a good classmate, you should tell us the secret of keeping in shape."

Under everyone's questioning, the atmosphere became active again, and it also resolved the embarrassment of the scene just now.

It is difficult to warm people's hearts, it is easy to hurt people's hearts, and sometimes the friendship that is painstakingly managed can be broken by a few harsh words.

The warmest thing in the world is language, and the most hurtful thing is language.

Keep your mouth shut and don't keep your mouth unobstructed. Save face for others in order to get along well with people.

Everything is too much, no matter how good the relationship, a joke that is too much, there will be a gap between each other.

And those who have high emotional intelligence often know how to think about others, and they can not only carry just the right kindness between words, but also resolve embarrassment and make people feel warm in getting along.

The more mature people are, the more they know how to be cautious in words and deeds, and grasp the measure. Paying attention to words and leaving three points at the lips is the wisdom of dealing with the world.

02

Do things carefully, things have fallen at hand

I know that a netizen asked: "What are the characteristics of unreliable people?" ”

One of the high-ranking zan replied: "While procrastinating and waiting, at the same time naïvely waiting for a good result." ”

In this world, there has never been a shortage of smart people, and what is missing is a solid and reliable person.

In life, we often encounter such people:

The words are very good, but the things are very perfunctory; they are not careful about doing things, and they like to shirk their responsibilities when things happen, and this kind of person is often unreliable.

In ancient times, there was a decisive battle, and everyone in the barracks was nervously preparing for the battle. The general appointed groom to replace the horseshoe for the horses, and the horsemen promised with a full mouth, and he promised that he would not fail in his mission.

The blacksmith, at the request of the groom, buried his head in the work, took four horseshoes off an iron bar, smashed it flat, fixed it to the horse's hoof, and then slowly and methodically nailed the iron nail.

Looking at the blacksmith's slow expression, the groom urged again and again impatiently. At this time the blacksmith noticed that the fourth horseshoe was missing a nail and got up to go to the warehouse to pick up the iron bar.

The groom grabbed the blacksmith and said, "Three nails can also be hung, and they will be used, and the general will use the warhorse urgently, and you and I cannot bear the guilt of delaying the war."

The blacksmith repeatedly told him that the three nails were not strong, but the groom had run out of patience and hurriedly pulled away the warhorse.

Later, when the war broke out, when the general charged on a war horse, the horse's paw, which was not nailed, suddenly fell off, and the war horse randomly overturned. The general was ready to grab the reins, who knew that the frightened war horse jumped up and fled, and the general was soon surrounded by the enemy.

Suddenly, the army was confused, panicked, and was attacked by the enemy, and finally the entire line collapsed.

No one could have imagined that the defeat of this war would be due to the negligence of The Groom, who would eventually bury the general, lose the battle, and destroy the kingdom.

People who do not do things reliably will only make mistakes at critical moments, thus losing the trust of others.

A sentence that agrees with it: "Reliable, easy to say, complicated to fall into; it sounds like a feeling, and it is a principle to do it." ”

Reliable people have the ability to make people feel at ease. The promises made will be fulfilled as best they can, and the promises will not be ambiguous.

Do things carefully, things have a place at hand, in order to win more opportunities for yourself, the road will be wider and wider.

Be honest and do things in a down-to-earth manner, so that life will not treat you badly.

03

To be a man and leave the way is to spare people

In the "Book of Fu Lei's Family", it is said: "Don't be bold if you are reasonable, but also spare people if you are reasonable." ”

If a person is not a sage, he can be blameless, and if he always clings to the mistakes of others and kills a thousand enemies, he will also lose himself eight hundred.

Not doing things to the extreme, leaving room for everything, is the foundation of life.

Just as the so-called "you respect me a foot, I respect you a foot", if you know how to give others steps, others will naturally know how to save face for you.

Truly intelligent people always understand and forgive others.

When Zeng Guofan first entered the official field, he often criticized the staff of the same dynasty as officials, and did not show mercy to the other party when he spoke, thus offending many superiors and colleagues, resulting in his restrictions in the official field.

At that time, the Internal and External Troubles of the Qing Dynasty, Zeng Guofan was even more outspoken for the sake of state affairs. Boldly point out that the emperor adheres to a "calm" attitude, does not cause trouble, does not act. The emperor was so angry that he almost killed him.

Because he always had to ignore people, his colleagues were very disgusted and disgusted with him, and the emperor repeatedly made it difficult for him.

Later, after reflection, Zeng Guofan realized his own faults and understood the truth that "today I am domineering with arrogance, and I expect him to be arrogant and domineering to me day".

So he decided to change himself. From then on, he slowly became kind and modest in his treatment of his colleagues; he was no longer so outspoken in his treatment of the emperor, but respectful and euphemistic. In the end, he cultivated himself into the "first person of ZTE Celebrity".

Because people are fast and quick to speak, and the person who refutes people's faces, even if he is talented and wise, it is difficult to gain people's hearts.

The battle of words and tongues will only provoke a right and wrong for oneself. Knowing how to give up three points in everything is not a clever way to live.

As the saying goes: "Leave a line of people, and see each other in the future." ”

People live for a lifetime, and ups and downs are the norm in life.

Don't do things too desperately, leave room for everything. Only by forgiving and forgiving is to avoid causing trouble.

04

Kazuo Inamori says in the Living Law:

"Life is a drama, and each of us is the protagonist of life." Not only that, the screenwriter, director and lead actor of this drama are all played by themselves. Our life has only one chance to self-direct and self-act. ”

In the second half of his life, he has quietly put away his sharp edge, and he is no longer as straightforward and fast-talking and impetuous as his youth.

Time brings precipitation, and finally makes us mature, humble and respectful.

There is no perfect life, and living yourself clearly is the wisdom that a mature person should have.

Click to see, may you and I in our respective lives, know the world without sophistication, smooth and naïve, become a truly mature person.