Some time ago, Huang Yi posted a text to celebrate the birthday of her 10-year-old daughter.
On that day, Huang Yi dressed up as the Disney princess image that her daughter liked, accompanied by the same princess cake, and the birthday celebration scene was lively and warm.
But even more moving is the letter written by Huang Yi himself for his daughter:
"When you are injured, your mother hurts you but there is no way to hurt you, as a mother can only give you more security and confidence, so that you can bravely ride the wind and waves like your mother in the next ten years." 」
Probably only by experiencing the heavy blows of life can you write these words for your daughter so gently.
She knows better than anyone that fate is uncertain, but the gift she gives her daughter is not total protection, but to teach her to be brave and accompany her to break in.
In fact, from falling down and frustrated to riding the wind and waves, Huang Yi not only regained her strength, but also provided the best growth example for her daughter.
01 Rely on marriage, trapped marriage
When Huang Yi is mentioned, it is impossible to avoid an unhappy marriage.
At that time, a divorce war with Huang Yiqing not only reduced her from a fire actress to having no drama to film, but also collapsed due to her ex-husband's rumor-mongering reputation, becoming a lesbian who loved to lie, cheat, was mentally abnormal, and even "cheated on marriage".
More importantly, when her heart was exhausted, her first husband, Jiang Kai, also jumped out to "add bricks and tiles", accusing her of being a "yin cat who can't forget to steal".
The two marriages are not good people. In the eyes of everyone, Huang Yi's misfortune stems from the unladylike encounter with people, but he cannot avoid the love brain and childish impulses.
It took a long time for her to confess: At that time, the doctor told me that I was difficult to conceive, so I was very happy after the unexpected pregnancy.
She is not unaware of Huang Yiqing's extreme irritability, but in order to give her children a home, she is willing to compromise and tolerate.
Probably Huang Yi was too eager to have a home of his own.
When she was on "Very Quiet Distance", the host Li Jing once asked her a question: What is the one thing you most want to change your family?
She replied with tears: From childhood to adulthood, what I hope most is to be a family together.
Due to the divorce of his parents and the long-term separation of the two places, Huang Yi was raised by his grandmother. She recalls her childhood being gray, "I used to talk to myself in the mirror, fantasizing that I was a little princess who was loved. ”
Even choosing to run away from home is only eager to get the attention and attention of their parents. After learning that my father was crying because he was worried about himself, his first reaction was excitement, "Even if it is worth the beating." ”
The shortcomings felt in the original family, Huang Yi once tried to make up for it with marriage, but marrying in order to get married inevitably plunged her into another besieged city and another tragedy.
Perhaps it is precisely so, the daughter is the bottom line that she has to keep with all her strength, even if it is unbearable, she does not forget to resolutely fight for the custody of her daughter.
Because it is no longer possible to create perfection for her daughter, we must give her the love she can. The colors that could not be captured in childhood, she wanted to let her daughter see them one by one.
It was just that At that time, Huang Yi did not expect that the children on the outside would still be used by their biological fathers to become the best candidates to pour dirty water on themselves.
02 Stand up in the trough
After the two divorced, custody went to Huang Yi, but the daughter would go to her father's place for a few days every month. At first, Huang Yi felt that this was nothing, even if his parents divorced, he was still the father of the child.
But gradually, Huang Yi found that videos of her daughter accusing herself of being a bad mother began to appear on the Internet, and the background was in Huang Yiqing's home.
She was angry and sad, and emotionally broken, angrily denouncing why her daughter had to cooperate with her father to lie.
What Huang Yi did not expect was that her daughter also cried bitterly, and she honestly told her mother: I thought that if I said a little more about your bad, my father would be happy, and he could say less bad things about you on the Internet.
He also confessed that no one really photographed her when he said it.
Huang Yi reacted to this, it turned out that Huang Yiqing induced his daughter to say that he was not, and secretly filmed it secretly.
The enmity between parents actually makes an ignorant child bear it. Huang Yi was even more devastated, blaming himself for why he had not protected his child.
It wasn't until Huang Yiqing was imprisoned for selling D products that this unbearable farce came to an end temporarily, and Huang Yi finally withdrew from the quagmire.
However, the glory of the past is gone. This divorce war seriously damaged her reputation and image, and under the overwhelming negative news, Huang Yi's acting career was completely stopped, and even claimed by advertisers.
At that time, Huang Yi fell into the lowest point of her life, in her words, "fell into the most terrifying abyss".
Without work, she washed her face with tears all day, chewing on the pain all the time, like a walking dead, and her face was no longer the glory of the past.
It was also from this time that she found that her daughter became more and more introverted, and she often did not say a word when she returned home from school, quietly staring out the window in a daze.
Once when I came back from school, my daughter rushed straight into her mother's arms, "Mom, I think I don't have friends, I think everyone doesn't like me." ”
The brokenness of the family has already planted a shadow in the hearts of children.
So much so that once when she came home, she saw her daughter lying on the ground rolling and screaming. At that moment, she seemed to see herself running away from home as a child. All the sprinklings are wayward, just because they are too insecure and eager to get a little attention.
It turns out that those screwed, unwilling, and obsessive not only destroyed themselves day by day, but also indirectly hurt the people closest to them.
Even her father asked her: Huang Yi, do you want to ruin a moment or a lifetime?
This sentence woke up Huang Yi. In the face of elderly parents and young daughters, what right does she have to talk about giving up?
03 Awakened mother, growing daughter
However, how easy is it to make a comeback with the popularity of passers-by who have been overdrawn?
Huang Yi finally decided to take out his years of savings to start a business. Just the twists and turns, because of impulsive investment, coupled with unfamiliarity with business operations, in just half a year, she lost most of the money and had very little left.
But after falling into the bottom of despair, it will not be easy to give up.
Soon, Huang Yi regained his strength and the team targeted a confinement club. In order to win the trust of customers, every New Year's Eve, she will put on exquisite makeup, wear Chinese cotton jackets, wrap red envelopes and lucky bags, and give New Year's greetings to the mothers of the Confinement Club one by one.
With a heart-for-heart exchange, her entrepreneurial path is finally on the right track, and the cake industry she invested in has also been a great success.
Many people don't know that the cake that appeared at Wang Junkai's eighteenth birthday party and Zhang Ziyi and Wang Feng's engagement banquet was exactly the brand of Huang Yi's investment.
From the confinement club to the beauty salon, cake shop, and then to the company's listed director, Huang Yi, who was defeated in the past, finally turned the tables against the wind and fought a beautiful turnaround battle.
And this positive energy is also subtly infecting the daughter:
When going to the training class, they no longer resist, and they will take the initiative to ask to learn what they are interested in; when they leave the class, they no longer look down at themselves in a daze, but gradually integrate into the games of their classmates, and even begin to take the initiative to invite friends to play at home.
It turns out that the process of the mother's awakening is the child's new beginning.
More importantly, the child has also invisibly become the light of the mother's progress. The driving force that contributed to Huang Yi's comeback to act was precisely her daughter.
Because I know my mother's love for acting, I encourage her to bravely pursue her career; because I have witnessed my mother's difficulty for so many years, I support her to pursue love and happiness again.
In the love variety show "Suddenly In the Heart", the daughter is Huang Yi's best assist: "Mom wants to give herself a chance to find someone to be my father." ”
In front of the camera, this 8-year-old child has a sensitive maturity beyond his age, as well as a precious sincere kindness.
In those times when they supported each other, they healed each other and grew up with each other, and Huang Yi undoubtedly became the best example for her daughter.
She let her daughter know:
It is inevitable to stumble in a lifetime, but everyone can stand up in the tribulations, and everyone has the opportunity to live better than yesterday.
04 Love children, but also love yourself
In fact, children and parents are mutually accomplished. When parents tilt their love too much toward their children, it will make the parent-child relationship unbalanced.
Before you love your child, always remember to love yourself first.
This is not about selfishness, but about a kind of education by example.
To find a role other than "parents", first love yourself and take care of yourself, in order to present a better state in front of your children, and only then can you have the strength to love your children and your family.
In the book "Fill Your Own Cup First", it is written: "Don't wait for others to fill your cup, and don't blindly give selflessly." If we can fill the cup in front of us first, we can naturally share the overflowing cup with the people around us. ”
In the variety show "Teenager Says", a girl named Lin Lihuo made such a request: I hope that my mother can love herself well. In her eyes, her mother sacrificed all her time and poured all her love into herself, but she ignored herself.
Studies have shown that when children feel too much sacrifice and compromise from their parents, they are more likely to be in a state of guilt; and because the pressure burden is too heavy, they are more likely to breed rebellious psychology, and a long time is not conducive to the healthy growth of children.
Similarly, if parents are worried and miserable all day, how can they have the patience to really care about their children's growth?
But if the parents are truly happy to live, the child can draw positive nutrients from it, and he can establish a sound and excellent personality in the ear.
This is the case with Gu Ailing, a ski genius who was very popular during this time. She once confessed in an interview, "My mother is a very brave, very confident, very powerful woman. ”
This is precisely because Gu Ailing's mother is good enough, not only from a top school, but also a Wall Street business elite, but also an excellent ski instructor.
Thus. Parents do a good job of themselves and love themselves, which is a valuable education in itself.
Just as Huang Yi once deeply regretted not being able to give her daughter a happy home, but in fact, there is not only one way to love children. When she stepped out of the mud of the swamp and found the direction of life, it was undoubtedly the best gift for her daughter.
Bless Huang Yi. The rainbow that she did not appreciate as a child, this time the daughter had it because of her.