The pursuit of happiness: In 2022, they made a wish to "get off the list"...

"The children are back in the New Year, it is very lively, but the bustle is very fast, the loneliness comes quickly, and the children return to their own homes after the New Year..." Mr. Xie, 84, said his helplessness on the phone and also expressed his desire to find a wife.

The pursuit of love has never been the patent of young people, and people of any age have the right to pursue the true love in their hearts. Now that the Year of the Tiger has set sail, let's listen to the voices of those who are eager to get rid of their singles and seriously seek happiness. Some of them are for themselves, and some are for their children...

The couple are deeply in love Partners + classmates raise eyebrows and make progress

"I have never liked any beautiful women, even the most beautiful face will eventually pass with the years, I like talented women, talent precipitation, people's temperament more and more charming." 」 In the eyes of 70-year-old Gan Enpei, his wife Yu Qin was a talented woman from a young age, raising eyebrows for 43 years, the old two were upgraded from partners to "classmates", and went to the old university together to take classes, the old learned, common progress, and the feelings were always fresh and warm in mutual appreciation. "Happiness is to be with each other until you are white-haired, which is the most romantic thing." Wife Yu Qin said.

Talents are shared, and we know each other hand in hand

Like most couples who came from that era, Gan Enpei and Yu Qin came together "through introduction". Unlike others, both are in love because of each other's "talent". "The two of us were from a factory, I was doing technical work on the workshop, he was assigned by a college student, working in the office. There were very few college students in that era, and he was tall and handsome. My master was a matchmaker for both of us, and the first time we met, we were both a little surprised, because the two of us were very close to each other's homes, and we took the same shuttle bus to work almost every day, but we didn't talk to each other, maybe this is the fate in the dark. Both of us were more satisfied with each other. Yu Qin recalled the past, and the corners of his mouth rose unconsciously. Gan Enpei also told reporters, "I just look at her talent, the speech is very level, I hope that my future partner is a type of love to learn, self-motivated, she is very in line with my standards." ”

Two young people with common talents fell in love for a year and then entered the palace of marriage, "We got married on a trip and went to Shanghai, because my wife is a southerner and my uncle is in Shanghai." We took the boat for almost 24 hours and took a wedding photo in Shanghai. In those days, it was already a very romantic thing. Yu Qin said.

Trust each other and work together for a small family

Due to the needs of Gan Enpei's work, he traveled in other places for many years, and After marriage, Yu Qin slowly got used to the life of going to work alone and taking children alone. When asked: "Have you ever complained in your heart for so many years?" Yu Qin replied without hesitation: No." At that time, I really didn't have any ideas, I felt that he was working outside, I should support this family, take care of the children, let him work outside without any worries, this is what a wife should do. ”

For his wife's dedication, Gan Enpei is also very touched, "I really thank my wife, she has really contributed a lot to this family." So, all the money I earned outside was given to her for safekeeping. She trusts me unconditionally, and I trust her unconditionally. Couples must trust each other in order to stabilize their feelings, especially for couples like us who have been separated for many years, trust is particularly valuable. ”

Inseparable, many years of partners into "classmates"

On the day the reporter met Gan Enpei and his wife, the two had just returned home from the recitation class at the university for the elderly. "We are not only husband and wife now, but also an escalated relationship, and we are still in the same class." This is the envy of the Gan enpei couple, the two people have similar interests and hobbies, whether it is life or study, the pace is the same. After retirement, both like to travel, before the outbreak of the epidemic, the two have traveled to many countries and regions, "we both like to travel, after returning from travel in the United States, we signed up for a course in travel English at the University of the Elderly." Just so that you can travel in the future to facilitate communication. Recently, Gan Enpei liked to recite again, so the two signed up for a recitation class at the university for the elderly in September last year, "I think it is very good for husband and wife to study together, and they can supervise each other and make progress together." I often say that my vision is not wrong, my wife is a talented woman, her attitude of loving learning, I think is the most attractive. ”

Mentioning the marriage preservation secret of the two, in addition to mutual trust, Gan Enpei said that he must not skimp on the praise of the other half. "People like to hear the language of praise, although it is an old husband and wife, but also at any time to find the highlights of the other party, and timely expression, 'sweet words' is an indispensable catalyst for marriage sweetness."

observatory Parents are anxious to "substitute blind date" their children negative "such as love"

Parents' tricks "urging marriage" is a hot topic in recent years. On the one hand, parents are anxious to "kiss each other", and on the other hand, children passively resist "waiting for love". Why are there such a big difference in attitudes towards love and marriage between two generations?

〉〉Countermeasures: Make marriage more attractive to young people

There is a huge difference in the needs of parents and children in the concept of marriage and love. The parents' generation has experienced the turmoil of life, and their marriage is biased toward pragmatism and focuses on the stability of life. The children's generation has not experienced material deprivation and hardship in life, so they want to get a connection and resonance with the other half in the spiritual world.

More and more financially independent young people do not want to "settle" into marriage, they want to meet people who can understand each other. Therefore, it also increases the difficulty of the younger generation to obtain love. Young people should try to learn to communicate with their parents, so as to win the understanding and respect of their parents.

The desire for love is human instinct, young people do not need to hide the expectation of love, do not have to fight against blind dates, even if frustrated, but also with a positive attitude to deal with. Give love, reap love, and experience the intimacy and harmony of connection.

Ms. Zhang, aged 67: Live for yourself in pursuit of happiness

After her birthday, Ms. Zhang, who lives in Shinan District of Qingdao City, officially entered the threshold of 67 years old. If in the past ten years, one old and one young have occupied most of Ms. Zhang's life, then now she wants to live for herself and pursue her own happiness.

Ms. Zhang was born in an intellectual family from an early age, and after getting married and having a daughter, she married and taught her children, and took care of it from outside the home. More than ten years ago, her husband died, and Ms. Zhang took on all the heavy responsibilities of taking care of her daughter. "Now that my little grandson has gone to school, and the nineties-year-old man left last year, it's time for me to think about myself." Ms. Zhang said that when the child is older, it is impossible to accompany herself all day, and her biggest wish this year is to find a wife to support and accompany each other.

Nowadays, Ms. Zhang's retirement life is colorful, going to the university of the elderly, going to the film and television crew as a mass actor... Ms. Zhang told reporters that she did not care too much about the economic conditions of the other party, as long as the people are good, the two sides have a common language, are stable, and can live together in peace and stability, it is worth the second half of the TOEFL.

Mr. Song, 58 years old: Longing to have a home in Qingdao

Mr. Song, 58, is a native of Weihai, Shandong Province, and has been in Qingdao for more than a decade. When he was young, Mr. Song had a relationship in his hometown, but when talking about marriage, the woman's request for a large banquet made Mr. Song at that time worried. Because of this, the woman fiercely proposed to break up and disappeared into Mr. Song's world.

This incident made Mr. Song heartbroken. In the days that followed, Mr. Song chose not to see anyone who introduced the blind date, and this delay was most of his life. More than ten years ago, Mr. Song came to Qingdao, and as he grew older, he had never been married and had the idea of finding a partner. "In the past, when my parents were there, I didn't feel anything like it, and now my parents are gone, and sometimes a person is really lonely."

Mr. Song said that qingdao's beautiful mountains and waters are more beautiful, and he especially hopes to have a home here and live the second half of his life. For the woman, Mr. Song said that he had no requirements, and if he only thought about the conditions, it would not be pure love. Everything external is secondary, and the key is to look at the feelings of two people. "In the new year, my biggest wish is to find a close partner as soon as possible." Mr. Song said with a smile.

The girlfriend acts as a mediator and helps her father keep his wife

Old people are in love, just like the old house is on fire and not saved. Especially when you find that you have a "love enemy", the chicken dog is restless, can the old two still go down? Yes, the key is to have a good "mediator".

One day, at 5 p.m., Before Chunmei in Tianjin left work, the mobile phone suddenly rang. Chunmei saw that it was her father's home number, and quickly picked it up: "Xiaomei, I am Aunt Chen, you come over from work, your father has nothing to do all day long, I have had enough, I can't live with him!" ”

After Chunmei's mother passed away, her father found his wife, Aunt Chen, who was 4 years younger than him. Chunmei's father is not bad in his heart, but he loves to doubt gods and ghosts. This time, Aunt Chen had a junior high school classmate who moved to her daughter's house after her wife passed away, just in the community opposite Aunt Chen. This old man went to Aunt Chen's house every three or five minutes to drink tea, which made Chunmei's father very annoyed. This afternoon, Chunmei's father went to the hospital to get medicine, and Aunt Chen's old classmate came to the door again. Aunt Chen knew that his wife was bothering him to come to the house, so she found a reason to take him to the garden near the community. Chunmei's father found someone to find the small garden, saw Aunt Chen and her old classmates "dating", angry and immediately went home to get the guy, had to give people some color to see. Fortunately, the people in the community have been dragging and dragging, so as to avoid a "vicious" incident. The old couple returned home and had a big fight, aunt Chen felt sad and aggrieved, and said that she didn't want to live with Chunmei's father again.

Chunmei took Aunt Chen's hand and said softly, "Aunt Chen, although my father is a little careful, others are still very good." Every time you go to my house, he always praises you, saying that you are a person who lives a life at first glance, diligent and has a good temper... My dad is careful with this, you still have to worry about it, you don't know him like that! ”

Seeing that Aunt Chen was not so angry, Chunmei taught her father again: "Dad, you are almost 70 years old, don't be too impulsive in the future, it is not good for your health." You are tough and tough, Aunt Chen is happy, we are even happier! ”

A storm finally settled. In the next few days, Chunmei was still a little relieved, and on the weekend, she rushed to visit her father. Just arrived at Aunt Chen's downstairs, the neighbor happily said to Chunmei: "These days, their old two children have a good relationship, all day long in and out of the pair, inseparable, more tired than the little young who is in love!" "Liu Shishuai

Fuyang, 63, of Liuzhou, Guangxi, originally couldn't stand his wife Qin Su's broken thoughts, and even developed a "fear of going home." Qin Su suddenly fell ill and died, and Fuyang deeply understood what it meant to cherish the people in front of him.

Can't stand my wife's broken thoughts and want to run away

Before Qin Su retired, Fuyang didn't think she was wordy. Because Qin Su was busy at work, he was too tired to talk when he returned home. Therefore, when Qin Su was close to retirement and Fuyang discussed whether to accept re-employment, Fuyang felt that the family's economic conditions were good and agreed that Qin Su would retire early and enjoy his old age. However, it didn't take long for him to regret it.

"I didn't come back for dinner, and the ingredients I bought in the morning were wasted." "Why do you socialize so much, do you think you're still in your twenties or thirties?" ...... Fuyang said that as soon as he returned home every day, Qin Su would nag non-stop. The quiet and accustomed Fuyang was very bored.

In order to listen to Qin Su's broken thoughts less, Fuyang suggested that she could go out and do part-time work, and proposed to let Qin Su pick up her granddaughter from school. However, even if something was busy, Qin Su's broken thoughts were still increasing. "Every day as soon as I got off work, she started telling me that my parents were short, and I was a little annoyed to hear them." Nagged by Qin Su too much, Fuyang found many reasons to delay the time to return home.

He also became fragmented at his daughter's house

"There is still a year to retire, and now you can't adjust your mentality, how can you live with your wife when you retire?" Colleagues advised Fuyang in this way. Unexpectedly, before Fuyang had retired, Qin Su fell ill.

Qin Su's illness came quickly and fiercely, her mental state was getting worse and worse, and her words were getting less and less. "A woman who has been reading at the root of your ear for so long suddenly becomes so quiet that she doesn't say anything, and I can't help but panic." At this time, Fuyang wanted to listen to Qin Su's broken thoughts. However, less than a year after his retirement, Qin Su died. After Qin Su left, Fuyang felt that the home had suddenly become very empty and had no popularity at all, and when his daughter proposed to let him move in with him, he agreed without hesitation.

"After moving to my child's house, I gradually understood Qin Su." Fuyang said that both his daughter and son-in-law are used to sleeping more than midnight, which he thinks is very bad. "Because of the late bedtime, I break my thoughts in front of the children every day." Fuyang couldn't remember when he had become a person who loved to break his thoughts. "I'm mentally prepared that sooner or later the child will explode."

Realizing that every nagging of his wife is a concern

Fuyang did not expect that the children's outburst would come so sweetly.

One day, Fuyang's throat suddenly felt uncomfortable, he could not speak, and the atmosphere at home became cold. This situation lasted for two days, and Fuyang was a little anxious, and couldn't help but say to his daughter and son-in-law in a hoarse voice: "Let's eat and talk about the next day, the atmosphere is so stuffy without talking." As soon as he finished speaking, his daughter and son-in-law laughed. The daughter said, "Dad, your voice is not good, we are talking non-stop, we are afraid that you feel lonely, so we will wait until your illness is better before speaking." We really can't stand being crushed by you before. Now I don't get bothered by you, but I'm a little unaccustomed to it. ”

I suddenly thought of Qin Su's nagging at me before he died. Looking back now, every nagging of hers was a reminder to me, and every sentence was a concern. The children are smarter than me, and they understand early on that their father's nagging is a concern from the bottom of their hearts, and they have no complaints, only cherishing. Fuyang sighed, "Before, I could have Qin Su's care unconditionally, but I didn't know how to cherish it." After losing her, I learned that cherishing the person in front of me is not an empty word. Qin Su has left, and the people in front of me are relatives and friends around me. We, who have been neglected to connect, it is time to get in touch. ”

(The characters in the text are pseudonyms) 45-year-old man's mother: I hope that when the house is finished, the daughter-in-law will also have it

For her son's marriage, 72-year-old Ms. Wu can no longer simply use the word "anxious" to describe, "Before New Year's Day introduced one, but I haven't seen it yet, after the year is a 45-year-old person, we are really worried." ”

Ms. Wu's son was born in 1977, and he is also picky about finding a girlfriend. In Ms. Wu's words, the son belongs to the "appearance association" and is particularly concerned about the woman's appearance. "Others have introduced a few people before, but every time he asks to see the photos first, we can't help it."

In Ms. Wu's view, the woman's character is good, and it is most important to live with peace of mind, but young people have young people's ideas, and parents can never help their children. "Fortunately, every time we ask him this question, he is not disgusted or rejected, maybe it is not yet fate." For the new year, Ms. Wu naturally hopes that her son can meet the right person as soon as possible and enter the marriage hall, "The newly bought house is being renovated recently, I really hope that the house is decorated and the daughter-in-law can also find it." ”

Mother of a 34-year-old girl: Find a boyfriend and grow old together

"The post-80s generation is not in a hurry, but as parents we are anxious, especially girls, the age is not sparing." 」 When she said this, Ms. Fang was a little helpless, but more than that, she was distressed about her daughter.

Ms. Fang's daughter, 34 years old, is still single due to her busy work and narrow social circle. "I've talked about it before, but because I don't have an eye rim and a different lifestyle, I haven't been successful." Ms. Fang said that her daughter's conditions are still good in all aspects, so she also has her own requirements in finding a boyfriend, "I hope that the boy can grow up in a family with sound parents, steady and self-motivated." ”

Ms. Fang told reporters that her biggest wish this year is that her daughter can find a suitable boyfriend as soon as possible, "The sooner the better, the two people can get along in all aspects, and they can grow old together." "Reporter Xu Yao

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Pastoral | always want to enter your heart

Pastoral quotes How can a woman hold a man

First, praise him skillfully. Psychological research has shown that one of a man's core emotional needs is recognition, and often praise his husband so that he can be actively mobilized for various emotions. How can it be exaggerated? This means that we must praise things without exaggerating people, and exaggerate him home, rather than praising heaven. For example, if he fixes the faucet and the sewers go through, you have to say, "Oh husband, you're awesome!" I don't know what to do without you. "If you praise like this, he will easily float." You should say something like, "Husband, you're awesome! You have to fix these things at home. "You have to associate what he does with his family so that he can be praised to go home. You have to be clear that praising him is not only to make him happy, but what can be brought to you after being happy.

Second, know how to get used to him in a measured manner. Men will be moved by the weakness of the little woman, but will be obsessed with the motherhood of the big woman. Evolutionary psychology has shown that the more mature men are, the more they need maternal care from women. When he can get the tolerance and love of women from his partner, he will take the initiative to release the inner little boy factor and entrust his whole body to you. Therefore, to get used to him, is to know how to soothe his emotions like a mother, rather than letting go, or hitting. If a man is a tree, a woman is a fertile land, and while a woman nourishes a man, a man's love is also taking root. But if you turn into a concrete floor, the result is that there is no grass.

The older the three women, the more attractive they are

The first is a woman who cherishes beauty and pays attention to maintenance. The more such women live, the more beautiful they become. Women are like flowers, and beauty is only possessed by pampering and petite beauty. Women who cherish beauty and pay attention to maintenance are very self-disciplined. Eating properly, staying active, and dressing and learning can't be less. This is a charm that requires a lot of perseverance to earn.

The second is an optimistic and cheerful woman. This type of woman does not have many hearts, because of her optimistic heart, she is more open-minded, and her eyebrows are naturally clear, and the older such a woman is, the more charming she is. And some women think more, always frowning, the days are long, the sorrow is all hanging on the face, naturally there is no charm at all.

The third is a thoughtful and learned woman. This kind of woman is charming with a bookish temperament, compared to the appearance, their temperament is excellent, read more books, see things more thoroughly, temperament is also with wisdom and wisdom, this kind of woman is not afraid of old age. When she was young, she was beautiful, and now even if she looks old, she is still an attractive woman.

How men behave is true love

A man's true love is never just lip service. A man who truly loves you can do the following three things.

First, I want to hug you all the time. If you have been apart for a long time, it is not as real as a warm hug to talk about you. Hugging is also the strongest support for each other.

Second, share his thoughts with you often. A man who truly loves you will not hide anything from you, he will communicate with you, communicate with you, and share his heart with you. Like to listen to you talk about your heart and care about everything about you. You have to know that whether two people can be together forever depends on whether each other's hearts can walk together.

Third, often give you some surprises and touches. On some special days, be able to receive gifts and surprises from him. You know, a bland life always requires some romance and ritual.

Marriage: Not for need, just for want

In life, if we can find someone, we are with each other and move forward hand in hand, which is a very beautiful and happy thing.

Of course, having a beautiful and harmonious marriage is a very difficult thing, but isn't this another meaning of marriage? The management of marriage requires communication, needs to learn how to love, needs to learn respect, learn to be tolerant, these are the growth we want to achieve.

From this point of view, a good marriage is by no means a "perfect marriage" without any problems, but a willingness to communicate with each other, a desire to grow, and the ability to become a better self and partner in solving practical problems.

In fact, one of the big reasons we don't want to get into marriage is the fear of getting hurt. This is actually a typical "external controller" thinking, that is, the result is predestined, and he has no control over the result. But whether the relationship lasts and the marriage lasts depends largely on ourselves.

Although passion is short-lived, the feeling of love can always exist. As long as we know how to keep each other feelings of being loved through loving actions and words, then the relationship can last forever.

Who would be willing to leave this feeling of being "loved"? The reason why people choose to leave is usually because they don't feel love. Maybe there have been times when they tortured each other in the name of love and hurt each other. But looking back, those hurts are actually the result of not knowing how to love.

Let go of worries, believe in love, and let the heart have more expectations and expectations, because the happiness of marriage is in your own hands. The reason why we are willing to choose marriage is not because I need it, but because I want to: I want to meet the person who can grow together, I want to feel the beauty of love together; I want to learn how to love and create a happy life that belongs to us.