Some people say: "The distance between you and your hometown is a ticket, you are here, your hometown is at that end, and at any time, your hometown is a worry that wanderers can't let go." ”
In addition to missing his parents, there is also a desire for home, and when the wanderer becomes an adult, he wants to find a lover in his hometown who will accompany him for life.
As a result, blind dates have become a traditional program during the New Year, and it is difficult for unmarried young people of the right age to calm down alone.
01. Roll up the blind date, a few joys and a few sorrows
In the workplace, there is a word called "volume".
This means that people spontaneously work hard to elevate the competitive environment, forcing everyone associated with it to stay up late to work.
When I returned to the countryside, I thought that the environment would be more relaxed, but it turned out that this was not the case.
Xiao Yang is 27 years old, already an older young man in the village, he has been dating for 5 years, and he has not found a suitable partner for marriage.
In the first two years, there were also girls willing, but proposed to ask for a dowry of 68,000 yuan, Xiao Yang's family could not get out, his mother was sick, and the money earned every year was only enough to see a doctor, where was the savings?
The marriage was delayed, Xiao Yang's father felt that he could not wait any longer, specially borrowed money to buy a car for his son, and then took a cigarette to discuss with the matchmaker, so that the other party could help his son with snacks.
The matchmaker has also changed her concept, no longer a traditional pure public welfare, but a profession, she has mastered the information of unmarried young people of the right age in several nearby villages, and will also do the appropriate matchmaking according to everyone's requirements.
Many girls go out to work, only the end of the year will come back, during the New Year, is a good time for blind date, my cousin is a blind date to get married, he is dating at the beginning of the year, getting married at the end of the year, feelings all rely on telephone contact, after marriage, husband and wife affection, has become a successful case of matchmakers hanging on the lips.
Here, I also want to say an objective fact, the cousin and sister-in-law have a good relationship, and he also has a relationship with his mother, when he goes out to work, his mother often calls the girl, makes food to send to the past, and buys clothes for the girl during the festival, which is a good god assist.
Coupled with the bride price, the family has a car and a house, the woman is also very assured, quickly agreed to the marriage, blind date is only a point, family relations are good, but also need to operate behind.
People's psychology needs a benchmarking effect, if a matchmaker introduces several successful marriages, her reputation will rise, and more families will come to her for help.
The matchmaker Xiao Yang is looking for is very hot, she will arrange blind dates every day, the method is also very simple and rude, that is, to invite a few single young people to the girl's home, and then obey the woman's arrangement.
Some girls attach importance to academic qualifications, some girls attach importance to image, and some girls attach importance to economic conditions, each person has different requirements, and the process of meeting will be different.
Xiao Yang was arranged to go on a blind date with a girl in a neighboring village, and there were many people standing in the girl's yard, and her parents and relatives held the first pass.
"Is there a house in the county seat?" Is there a stable job? Earn more than $4,000 a month? Do you have a car? Is the bride price willing to pay 100,000? ”
After getting a positive reply, the boy can enter the house to meet the girl, and those who have no room can only stand outside the courtyard and wait, and there is a high probability that they will not even have the opportunity to meet.
02. The door is right, and it is also necessary to be evenly matched
Xiao Yang went on a blind date 4 times and met 2 girls, one of whom chatted well with one girl and exchanged contact information.
A few days later, the matchmaker told him that the girl was going to come to his house to see, which is also called "housekeeper", that is, to investigate the family situation of the man's family.
Xiao Yang's father swept the yard early, bought back various fruits, and prepared a large red envelope of 6,000, if the girl accepted it, it meant that the marriage was completed.
The girl and her aunt, aunt, aunt and a group of people came, it can be seen that the girl and Xiao Yang are still very close, the father also took out the red envelope, the girl resigned for a while, accepted, Xiao Yang grew a breath.
Under the arrangement of the matchmaker, in line with the principle of grasping good things, the Xiao Yang family put the negotiation of marriage on the agenda, that is, the appointment of relatives, on the day of the appointment, the man needs to give the bride price and the girl some jewelry, and the two children can also go out to work together and be together as a couple.
Many parents are worried about the long night and dreams, once both parties are willing, they will seize the opportunity to let the two people cultivate feelings together, and let the fellow villagers know that this girl has a master.
The bride price discussed by the two sides is 120,000 eight, the matchmaker told Xiao Yang that the woman's family is very considerate, although the local bride price starts at 100,000, but many people have to pay the bride price to 160,000 or 180,000, and some women's parents still regard this matter as face, only more than other girls, otherwise it will appear that their daughter is not worth much.
The dowry of 128,000, as well as some jewelry and clothes, is also a burden on the Xiaoyang family, but his father gritted his teeth and agreed, he did not want to miss it again, as long as his son lived well, the old man could work hard to pay off the debt.
But also do not know who passed the word, the woman's family knows that the Xiao Yang family has no money, the bride price is borrowed, immediately turned her face, worried that the conditions are too poor, the daughter will suffer after marriage, plus Xiao Yang's mother died of illness, there is no mother-in-law to help, after the child is not helped, the woman rejected this marriage.
From joy to disappointment, in just ten days, Xiao Yang tasted all the sour, sweet and bitter.
03. Reading more books is an opportunity for a breakthrough
Someone on the Internet asked: "Is there a chance to change your destiny in life?" ”
The answer is yes, reading is the way to change destiny.
There are also some young men in the village who do not have to worry about marriage, and XiaoJun, who is the same age as Xiao Yang, graduated from college, went to graduate school, and entered a multinational company to work, with an annual salary of 300,000 yuan.
He and his wife are college classmates, and they have taken graduate school together, the two stayed in The Magic Capital at the same time, and they are like-minded, although the conditions of the Xiaojun family are average, but the woman's family is very supportive of their marriage.
The dowry symbolically gave 28,000, the dowry was 100,000, and the help of the two young families to save money to buy a house is to see that the small army has an interest, and will certainly have the ability to live a good life in the future.
Both are rural children, because of how much they read, their fates are very different.
It does not mean that if you study well, you must have a good marriage, there is no necessary connection, but there is a causal relationship.
Because you are in a different circle, the people you come into contact with are different.
A psychologist said: "A person's words and deeds largely reflect his heart, and the more he lacks something, the more he craves something." ”
Some girls have a general family, earning limited money, put their hopes on the in-laws, want to get rich overnight through marriage, but ignore that what you have is only a temporary phenomenon, because the man uses the strength of the whole family to do marriage, there will inevitably be some expectations for you, if you can not meet the requirements of virtuousness, diligence, and having a boy, it is likely to produce family conflicts.
And those far-sighted parents, will not put the bride price first, but to examine the man's character and thinking, if the man is active, even if it is difficult for a while, there will be a time to develop.
After seeing the blind date process of rural youth, I was glad that I got married a few years earlier, and I recognized that I changed a person's destiny.
If you want to jump out of the chosen circle, only you work hard and accumulate the strength to break through yourself, when you have more knowledge or skills, maybe you have more opportunities to meet excellent girls, and you don't need to queue up for a blind date.
Marriage, which determines the second half of a person's life, is really sloppy.
One wrong step, one wrong step, we always have to find the like-minded person, do not be wronged by the urging of parents.
Give yourself a thumbs up! What is the bride price in your hometown?