In the 14 years since I graduated from high school, Cheng Ziming and I have met a total of 5 times, the most recent of which was to participate in his daughter's full moon wine, and I flew from Zhengzhou to Chongqing.
After the full moon feast, we went to a small hot pot restaurant for a drink. I glanced at the red sweater he was wearing and quipped, "Are you still Cheng Ziming, the dead fat man is so greasy." Cheng Ziming grinned: "People are greasy until they are middle-aged!" You haven't changed much, you're still so thin. ”
I always feel that men are still thin and good, looking at the spirit, but the fat ones seem to be very secure.
When I was drunk, I suddenly said to him, "You have changed, you are not Cheng Ziming!" ”
Cheng Ziming is probably like this
The first time I met Cheng Ziming was in 2006, when I was just in high school, and his first impression on me was very bad. We all grew up in one of the most inconspicuous counties in Henan Province, that is, the kind of poor counties with no mineral resources, no transportation and tourism, no industrial base, and only huge population advantages.
Poor people think about change, I have to say that our high school is a well-known key middle school, and those who can be admitted are the "village children" of ten miles and eight townships. I had just crossed the score line that year, but I wasn't the last one, because I had nearly two hundred classmates behind me who came in by paying a "sponsorship fee" of more than 10,000 yuan.
Cheng Ziming is different, he was admitted with the first place in the town, and he was also ranked among the top students in all the high school freshmen, and he was a proper honor student. Later, according to his own account, his photograph is still hanging in the window of the junior high school building.
Cheng Ziming was not at all like a standard good student.
Maybe it is a bully, he always sleeps in class, especially in the language class, more unscrupulous, always feel that there is a wall of books in front of the desk, wearing thick glasses, one meter and five meters tall Chinese teacher can not see, do not leave me any face, after all, I am the representative of the language class, but also his table.
A wall of books on a desk
He was obsessed with all kinds of fantasy xiuxian novels, the school on the stall five yuan a pirated book he bought more than a dozen, but most of them were confiscated by the class teacher, and later he tore the novel into a dozen copies, only one copy a day to the classroom, to avoid the total annihilation of the army, after all, everyone is a poor student, although five yuan is not much, it is also a day's meal money. Even so, it was not long, once the evening self-study was discovered by the drunken old class, and the old class was furious and punched Cheng Ziming from the podium to the door.
I could tell that he wanted to resist, but he didn't dare to have a seizure, after all, we were only 15 years old at that time.
After being beaten, Cheng Ziming still did not change his teaching, and did not know where to change a second-hand Newman mp3, which had a small thumb-sized display screen on it, and he had to use this line of e-books that could only display 8 words to read for two months.
One day he said to me: "Don't read it, it's boring, this kind of novel is all obscenity", I thought his prodigal son turned back, and later I learned that his eyes were more than a hundred degrees short-sighted, and it took more than a hundred to re-wear a pair of glasses.
New Newman MP3
Cheng Ziming sang huge and ugly, when he sang "Pray for Buddha", the action expression was extremely obscene, the eyebrows were tightly twisted, the chin protruded, the fists were clenched, the buttocks were slightly pinched, and the feeling of constipation for three years always made people can't help but want to kick him; he always loved to sing "Perfume Is Poisonous" to the girls, and the expression of the deeply resentful woman provoked them to scream and scold; he tampered with the lyrics of "Chrysanthemum Stage", "Chrysanthemum is crippled, full of stomach wounds, and your smile has turned yellow", which attracted a bunch of boys' vulgar laughter.
Cheng Ziming likes to play cards, in his childhood in the village head stone slab from the farmers learned a lot of skills, every Saturday night always shouted a few classmates in the bunk to fight the landlord, because the dormitory at ten o'clock power outage, four people are happy to take turns to play with flashlights, not long after I was pulled down by him.
Later, Cheng Ziming felt that playing cards was no longer enough, and began to learn to play online games. Students from the countryside may have a natural inability to resist online games. We often go out at night to play "Fantasy Journey to the West", come back at four or five o'clock in the morning, and sleep all day during the day.
Once it was snowing heavily, Cheng Ziming and I slipped a little when we climbed over the wall, my left hand pressed on the broken glass piece on the wall, suddenly the blood flowed, found a small clinic to simply bandage it, did not dare to tell my parents, and did not have money to break the cold, that time I quit, Cheng Ziming still every three to five over the wall.
It is such a boy who loves to play and sleep, loves crazy and loves waves, and his academic performance has inexplicably not fallen at all. I asked Cheng Ziming why I studied so hard, you don't study better than me, he put his hands together and said, "I don't know, maybe a little smarter than you!" ”
To be honest, his clever head made me jealous for a long time.
But Cheng Ziming's English is not good, Gestalt fill in the blank 20 questions, he has always relied on Meng, because he did it seriously, he can only answer three or four correctly, and the probability of Meng's pair is higher and more effective, which is also the only weakness in his learning.
Cheng Ziming also has chivalry and righteousness that I admire.
Most of my classmates are from the countryside, the school has a subsidy program for poor students, the girl Lin Yue applied for six hundred yuan, but the director of the Political and Educational Office deducted three hundred, and lied to her that he helped to apply for subsidies. Where did the simple Little Girl Lin Yue see such a sinister heart, and only secretly told Cheng Ziming of the same village about this matter.
Cheng Ziming immediately became angry, scolded the director of the Political and Educational Affairs Department for being a hypocrite, despicable and shameless, and dared to withhold even the money of poor students; after class, he ran to the Political and Educational Affairs Office, shouted loudly, and threatened to sue the principal.
Later, the students in the class learned of Cheng Ziming's heroic feat of seeing the uneven roar and honored him as "Liang Shanming".
On the day of the Wenchuan earthquake in 2008, the first class in the afternoon was a language class, at about two and a half o'clock, the earthquake wave came over, the students were terrified, they were scattered, I ran downstairs to be frightened, the school loudspeaker repeatedly shouted that there was no one in the teaching building, at this time I suddenly thought that the language teacher with a big belly had not yet come down, and was struggling with whether to go up to find it, When Cheng Ziming appeared.
He carried the Chinese teacher's bag obliquely, and carried her slowly out of the teaching building under the gaze of everyone, and walked down the steps step by step. Although at that time, the whole audience was cheering and applauding like in the TV series, but in my heart I had already shouted: Cheng Ziming, you are really a heavenly soldier.
Because of the earthquake, the most optimistic model couple in the class broke up, about the earthquake struck, the boy ran away, what "protect you thoroughly, love you forever" vows have long been thrown out of the cloud of nine.
Cheng Ziming and I also did something that was very inappropriate to think about now on the night of 5.12. That night after school holidays, I actually went out with him for a drink.
It was Cheng Ziming who proposed to drink, and several of us were vigorously thrown by him.
Now I can still feel that every teenager has the simplicity and kindness of compassion, but the feelings of home and country that help the world are not so hot.
The school organization donated money for the Wenchuan earthquake, Cheng Ziming donated a month's meal money, I asked him why he wanted to donate so much, he said to me lightly: "I don't know why, just think!" ”
I know he won't go hungry because he'll go out on weekends to buy instant noodles, ham sausages and other snacks to sell in various dormitories, although he can only make 1 cent for a bag of Beijing instant noodles.
Five dime pack of Beijing instant noodles
A month later, I transferred to a field of study.
Before the college entrance examination, we talked on the phone, he told me that I want to study medical university, first, after all, studying medicine is a solid craft, and it will be good for employment in the future, after all, his parents are ancestral farmers, he has almost no resources to inherit, and he can only rely on himself if he wants to change his life against the sky. The second is because their family is a hepatitis B carrier, he wants to work in this direction, maybe one day he can completely defeat the hepatitis B virus is unknown.
No one was afraid to alienate him because he was a hepatitis B carrier, but in his heart, it must be an unspeakable burden on life.
Three years of high school, two years of re-enrollment, there is no other way but to insist
The college entrance examination questions in 2009 were surprisingly difficult!
Cheng Ziming, whose first, second, and third models are all more than six hundred points, has only scored more than five hundred points, and has not yet crossed a line. He called that day, and I asked him what he was planning, and he said helplessly, reviewing it, he was not willing to explain himself like this.
I went south to college, and he went back to his familiar classroom with his book in his hand. The director of the teaching had a sneering look on his face, and he glared back viciously.
I never asked him how it was to re-read life, and in my heart I always felt that re-reading was a nightmare that I did not dare to think about or do, and only those who experienced it could feel the heartache in it.
Re-reading that winter vacation, he suddenly called, said solemnly that he liked a girl, but he was afraid of affecting his grades, and before he could finish, I scolded him and hung up the phone.
Thinking about it later, I shouldn't have scolded him as a winner or a comer, but I had to do that myself.
The following year's college entrance examination, I did not pay too much attention, in August I received a text message from him: "Brother, buddy is going to read the fifth year of high school." ”
At that moment, I didn't know how to comfort him.
Cheng Ziming has the courage to become more and more courageous, because there is no other way but courage and persistence. Before the third college entrance examination, he called and said that no matter how many points he scored in this test, he would not repeat it.
Ordinary people who work hard and are tenacious will not be disappointed by fate. Cheng Ziming successfully entered Sichuan University and said goodbye to his five years of high school life.
We would have been in touch often, but it seemed that he would never again be as cynical as before about unpalatable food, strange roommates, boring classes, and a lot of boring time. We occasionally talk about his vision and planning for the future, but he can no longer find the confidence and pride of hanging pots and helping the world in his future, and instead replace them with expectations shared by the vast majority of ordinary people:
1 W+ work per month;
Buy a house in Chongqing;
Marry a kind and filial girl;
Bringing parents to city life.
I asked him how he had bowed his head to life so quickly, where did your ambition to soar to the heavens go, and whether he was really willing to be an ordinary person.
The sign of a person growing up is to accept the mediocrity of their parents, and the sign of maturity is to accept their own ordinariness.
As early as more than a decade ago, I clearly knew that my parents were authentic farmers, with no culture, no dreams, and no resources, and that a year of hard work may not be as good as other people in the city for a few meals. But they fed me, gave me three meals, and provided me with a book, and I was indebted to it. They could only send me to the asphalt road at the head of the village, and as for where I went and how far I could go, they couldn't see or help.
Graphics and text are irrelevant
I have always told myself to take the right path and learn to be fierce, although I have also learned others to read novels, play games, drink and get tattoos and fall in love, but whose youth will be as clean and pure as in idol dramas, spotless, except for a very small number of people who have absolute resources, the vast majority of teenagers are city life, fireworks life.
I've been fighting and I've never stopped.
You don't experience a nightmare-like re-reading life.
In the four years of college, I only returned home once, that time when my father was seriously ill, and the rest of the time I was tutoring, handing out flyers, and delivering takeaways.
For three years as a graduate student, I worked as a horse for my mentor that year, did all kinds of private work, and even went to his house every month to clean up, just so that I could successfully graduate.
Just graduated to find a job, I was cheated twice by unscrupulous enterprises, I lit the lamp and stayed up late to work hard, and I couldn't even get three meals a day.
I used to feel that I was a light, dazzling and dazzling at the same time illuminating and warming others. Their talent, hard work, tenacity, persistence, even if they do not have parents' money connections to rely on, they can break out of their own world like other self-made successful people. But the older you grow up, the more you will find that all your efforts and struggles cannot fundamentally change the fate of the ordinary, and luck and success will always focus on a very small number of people.
The greatest success of the so-called change of life against the sky is to send us from the vast and barren countryside to the bustling and crowded cities.
I bought a house in Chongqing, although not big, but very cozy;
I married a good girl who was kind and filial and could accompany me all my life, and now I have a lovely daughter;
Although my parents are getting older, fortunately, their bodies are disease-free and disaster-free;
I found a nine-to-five job, although the salary is not high, but it is very stable, and I have more time to spend with my family;
Time comes rushing in, accepting your own ordinary, healthy life, living peacefully, smiling happily, and being properly busy, which is the greatest happiness in ordinary life.