Li Lili, Mediator, Grid Center, Tingluo Town, Lijin County: My Mediation Story

Qilu Evening News Qilu One Point reporter Cui Lihui correspondent Zhang Jun

December 24, 2021. The early morning of winter is always hazy, the sunrise has not yet come out, the moon has not set, I hear a quarrel outside the door: "Either you will kill me, or leave me alone, I don't want to go to school... Uh-huh..."

"I'll kill you now!" The voices of children and men rang out in the street. I am a full-time mediator at the Grid Center of Tingluo Town, Lijin County, and my first reaction as a mediator is to hurry to the scene. A bone crawled up, grabbed the cotton coat and went out. It turned out that the neighbor Xiao Yuhui and his father were arguing, and his father was holding a broom in his hand, his eyes widened, and he saw that he was about to fight down, and Yuhui could not cry. I hurriedly pulled him over, "Something to say slowly, fight will not solve the problem!" Yuhui's father sighed and left the broom behind him, crouching on the ground and burying his head in his arm. Seeing that the neighbors had gathered, I persuaded the father and son to go back to the house and talk.

The two of them told me things slowly. It turned out that Yuhui's parents had been divorced for many years, and his father brought back an aunt and a little boy after the National Day, saying that he wanted to start a family, but Yuhui felt that his father was planning not to be himself. Not only did he not agree to his father's remarriage, but since then he has begun to rebel and hate school, and he has been persuaded to go back to school a few times before, but this time he said that he would not go to death.

After understanding the situation, I began to talk with the child, the child told me: "Mom has left me, if Dad gets married again, there will definitely be no one to take care of me, I don't want to go to school, I feel that everyone else has Mom and Dad, I have nothing, they are laughing at me." After saying that, he lowered his head and fiddled with his fingers uncomfortably, which was a scene that really hurt people. I also learned from Yuhui's father that he remarried not only for himself, but more for his children to have a complete home, and his stepmother is also his mother, and now many remarried families are also very happy and harmonious.

Originally, this contradiction and misunderstanding was explained clearly, but I knew that the child is not an adult, although he is already an independent person, but after all, the psychology is not complete and strong enough, in case of entering the misunderstanding, it is very scary. I got in touch with the teacher of the school again, explained the situation, and decided to persuade step by step, using conversation, intuitive, and indirect ways to resolve the knots in the child's psychology. On the other hand, the matter of persuading the father to remarry should not be rushed, but should be premised on the healthy growth of the child, and the father also agreed. After a week of communication and resolution, Yuhui finally returned to campus and began to study and live normally.

The family is the basic cell of society, children are our hope for the future, good family relations, healthy parent-child cultivation is crucial to our social harmony. Although "every family has a difficult scripture to read", the people's mediation work is oriented to the society, serves the masses, resolves family conflicts in a timely manner, and calms disputes between family members, so as to fundamentally build the "first line of defense". In the harmonious chapter, every note is very important, let us mediators become the "resting sign" and contribute their own small strength to this beautiful song.