Interesting Historical Figure 16: Song Dynasty Haiyou satirizes Cai Jing and Tong Guan's funny passages

Hello everyone, I am the Prince of The Maharaja, this is the 16th article of "Interesting Historical Figures".

Today, let's talk about the funny passages of the Song Dynasty Haiyou satirizing Cai Jing and Tong Guan.

Those who have seen "Water Margin" know that Cai Jing, the prime minister and calligrapher of the Northern Song Dynasty, can be said to be a generation of celebrities and the king of all beasts.

As for the character and skin, they belong to the type of perennial runaway from home, so the character aspect is a word: "ten thousand years of stink".

Oh, everyone spit and look down.

Oh, spit it out again.

He and Emperor Huizong of Song were in cahoots and squandered, ruining the great Northern Song Dynasty. At the end of the Northern Song Dynasty, Chen Dong, a student of the Tai Dynasty, wrote to Cai Jing as "the head of the Six Thieves of Xuanhe".

Later generations even listed him, along with Qin Ju and Yan Song, as the three major adulterers in history. If you want to say that Cai Jing did bad things, it is estimated that a book can be published. But at present, we only talk about Hai You, and only talk about Hai You's funny satire on him.

First, mint as ten big money

In the second year of Chongning, Cai Jing made a decision against his ancestors and suggested that the imperial court recast large sums of money. After the recast, 1 big coin tops 10 small money, and it is very inconvenient for the people to use it.

Once, at a banquet in the palace, Hai You performed on stage. A haiyou played the role of a person who bought soy milk and asked the boss who sold soy milk: "Is your soy milk warm?" ”

The boss said dismissively: "Can I sell your raw soy milk at this soy milk stall?" ”

So I spent a lot of money and bought a bowl.

The boss said: "I have just come out of the stall, there is no change for you, or you can drink a few more bowls." ”

People who buy soy milk have no way, drink five or six bowls in a row, really can't drink anymore, hold the big belly and say: "Fortunately, a big money is worth ten small money, if it is worth a hundred small money, it will not support me" (quite Chen Peisi sketch to eat noodles)

Song Huizong saw this and smiled slightly, but that was not real happiness, it was just his protective color.

He also realized that the large copper coin was really inconvenient to use. He ordered that the practice of minting large copper coins be stopped. [From Song, Zeng Minxing's "Awakening Magazine"]

Although it is recorded in this way, the fact is impossible, and Song Huizong could not have cancelled a large amount of money because of this small matter.

Second, the words of the gods

The advantage of Chongning big money is that the quality is very good, and the text on the money is written by Song Huizong himself, so it is also called "Royal Book Money", the minting process is also very exquisite, and the people who collect ancient coins are very fond of it.

However, the shortcomings of big money were very mad, and Song Huizong and Cai Jing used it to plunder the wealth of the common people.

1 big money equals 10 small money, but the weight is only equivalent to 3 small money. The state collected 3 small coins, and re-minted the small copper coins into large coins, which is equivalent to the state having 10 small coins on hand, and 7 more pieces were out at once, and there was no middleman to earn the difference.

Winning the hemp belongs to yes, that is, suffering the common people.

Since 3 small coins can be re-minted, it can be worth 10 dollars, and the profit is greater than that of drug trafficking, there will definitely be people who risk killing their heads to mint money privately. Make money, business, don't be humble.

At that time, there were many outlaws in Suzhou who illegally forged, and by the time Chongning was five years old, inflation was already very serious.

One year, when There was a big water in Suzhou zhejiang, there was Hai You acting in front of Song Huizong, and one of them, Hai You, said: "This year, there was a big flood in the southeast, and I asked Ding Shen to go to Suzhou to be the town water god Ding. ”

Before Cai Jing said to Emperor Huizong of Song, now that the imperial court has a lot of money, we have to spend more money for the country, get rich, we can prepare more things about etiquette, so there are nine dings. The emperor is centered in the middle of the eight directions.

There was a haiyou who played the role of Ding Shen and said, "I don't want to go, I'm afraid that when I get there, I will be turned into copper and water and cast as ten coins." (From "Pingzhou Can Talk", Song, Zhu Yu)

The Ding God played by the people here, although the speech is absurd and funny, it also points out the irrationality of Chongning's large money at that time, reflecting the phenomenon of stealing coins.

Three, thirty-six buns

The protagonist of this paragraph is Tong Guan, known as the iron-legged floating water, and is also one of the "Six Thieves of Xuanhe", and everyone who has seen "Water Margin" knows this person.

Tong Guan is a eunuch, when he was young, he was not motivated, almost 20 years old, mixed can not be on the table, a fierce heart to become a eunuch, since then "Tong Guan" has become "Tong Guan", so Tong Guan as a eunuch can do such a breakthrough with a beard.

Tong Guan initially threw himself under the eunuch Li Xian, but Li Xian was not interested in him and did not care much.

At first, he could still maintain a positive and optimistic attitude towards life and the calmness of no sex life, and then he waited for almost 20 years before he could not sit still.

After Emperor Huizong of Song ascended the throne, he frantically licked Emperor Huizong of Song. He was 28 years older than Song Huizong, and when he played, Song Huizong was not even a fertilized egg. The old hooligan coaxed the little hooligan, coaxing one quasi..

In the south, he collected strange stones and calligraphy for Emperor Huizong of Song, and helped Cai Jing become the prime minister, and Cai Jing recommended him as the northwest overseer, so he held military power for 20 years, when people called Cai Jing "Gong Xiang" and called him "Concubine".

During the Xuanhe period, Tong Guan was defeated by the enemy at Yanji and fled into the wilderness. Later, emperor Huizong of the Song Dynasty held a feast in the imperial palace, and the church offered three geisha.

The three geisha play the role of three handmaidens, all dressed beautifully, but the jewelry on their heads is different.

The first one was to tie a bun on his forehead (read ji) and stand up and say, "I am the maid of the Cai Taishi (Cai Jing) family." ”

The second geisha's hair bun, casually combed next to it, stood up and said, "I am the maid of the Zheng Dazai (Zheng Juzhong) family."

The third geisha, with his hair tied in a bun and like a child, stood up and said, "I am the maid of the Tong Dawang (Tong Guan) family."

Others asked them, is there anything special about these buns?

The first maid said, "My master often visits the emperor, so I call it 'Chao Tian Bun'." ”

The second maid said, "My dazai has nothing to do and is often at home, so I call it 'lazy buns.'" ”

The third maid said, "The king of my family is in charge of the army, so I call it 'thirty-six buns.'" [From the Southern Song Dynasty, careful "Qi Dongye Language"]

Here is haiyou using the harmonic sound of "thirty-six plans", mocking Tong Chuan as the commander-in-chief, but will not fight, only "go for the top plan" to escape. Floating on the water with iron legs is not a waste of time.

I am a prince, and I will often share humorous methods, funny history and things.

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