Interesting historical figure 17: Jiao De satirizes Song Huizong, Cai Jing, and Yang Jian's funny passages

Hello everyone, I am the Prince of The Maharaja, this is the 17th article of "Interesting Historical Figures".

Today, let's talk about Jiao De's funny satire of Song Huizong, Yang Jian, and Cai Jing.

The year of Jiao Desheng's death is unknown, but it is only known that he was a character during the Song Huizong period and worked as an actor in the Jun Tianle Department.

Jiao De was eloquent and interesting, and when he was young, he once sprayed several people who read articles and did not forward them, and was appreciated by Emperor Huizong of Song.

First, basho

During the Chongning period, Emperor Huizong of Song ordered people to build "Gongyue" in the Imperial Garden, and then set up "Ying Fengsi" and the general leader "Huashi Gang". Zhu Xun (one of the Six Thieves of Xuanhe) was sent to preside over Ying Fengsi and search around Jiangnan for rare herbs and strange stones.

Zhu Xun is a very pure person, hates money and feels vulgar. He saw that the good things in the homes of ordinary people were taken directly to avoid money transactions.

Zhu Xun not only did not give money, but even asked the common people for money, to see who had money, to blackmail whom, and when he encountered people who had no money, he also had to arrest two handfuls of melon seeds from others.

In order to transport these flowers and stones to the capital, a large number of ships were requisitioned, and the people suffered money along the way. Among them, there is a huge Taihu lake stone, and many bridges, water conservancy facilities and city gates are destroyed on the transport road to pass through, which is quite brutal.

These flowers and plants were transported to the royal garden, some of which were not planted in time, some of which were not suitable for the climate, and many of them died directly, and then transported new ones.

One day Jiao De accompanied Song Huizong to play in the Royal Garden, Huizong saw a lot of new plants, did not know the name, pointed to some plants, asked Jiao De what plants, Jiao De unified answer is "plantain".

Huizong asked curiously, "Do you think that I am very simple, but you think that I am very deceitful?" How can so many kinds of plants be called plantains? ”

Jiao De said: "I saw that these plants were transported from all over the country, the road was far away, the water supplement was insufficient, and they were all scorched to the Royal Garden, but wasn't it plantains?" (Harmonic terrier, deduction)

Huizong immediately laughed, laughing as if he had constipation and could suddenly come out. [From Song, Zhou Hui," Qingbo Magazine】

Song Huizong brought a heavy disaster to the common people for his own little interests, and such people should end up in a tragic end.

Zhu Xun's misdeeds in the south directly provoked the Fang La rebellion. Fang La did not say that he wanted to hack Emperor Huizong of Song to death, and that I would become emperor, but instead called for the murder of Zhu Xun, which showed that this person attracted a lot of hatred.

Second, it is like self-defeating

Yang Jian (not Erlang Shen) was a eunuch of the Northern Song Dynasty, very favored by Emperor Huizong of Song, a eunuch who was finally able to reach the rank of Taifu.

Yang Jian had an ugly face, and none of his facial features could pass. At the same time, his character is also very poor, and when he encounters a friend who invites him to dinner, he must eat a box of stomach digestion tablets in advance.

He and Cai Jing, Tong Guan, these people are a kind of goods, that is, he died early, otherwise "Xuanhe Six Thieves", he would also have to be honored on the list. Killing me, I couldn't imagine that an ordinary Song Huizong period could cultivate so many traitors.

Emperor Huizong of Song once went to Yingxiang Pond to play, and when he saw that there was a stone in the garden that was ugly, he asked yang Jian, the internal attendant, "Where did this stone come from?" ”

Yang Jian said, "I bought it and spent it." ”

Jiao De sneered: "The temperament of the stone is very similar to Yang Jian. ”

Song Huizong laughed after hearing this, laughing like a child of more than two hundred pounds. (From the Book of Ke, Song · Zhang Zhifu)

This story is not interesting, it is purely to ridicule Yang Jian. It is indeed not good to joke about people's appearance, but who let Yang Jian really not do it, and the damage will also be damaged.

Third, the face of the public

Cai Jing was impeached on one occasion, removing him from the position of prime minister. However, as Emperor Huizong's loyal licking dog, even if he was deposed, Emperor Huizong still liked him very much, so next to the former prime minister's mansion, Emperor Huizong gave him a piece of land.

With land, and not bad money, we must engage in real estate, high-rise buildings, and banquet guests.

But there are still hundreds of families living on this land. Cai Jing is also a happy person, directly looking for the underworld to drive them away, and not giving money, these people are instantly homeless.

Cai Jingyuan's former prime minister's mansion is called "East Garden", and the newly built land is called "West Garden".

One day, Cai Jing took a large group of people to play in the West Garden, and Jiao De also came to join in the fun.

Cai Jing asked Jiao De, "How is the scenery of the West Garden compared to the East Garden?" ”

Jiao De said: "The east garden is like a cloud, and the west garden is like rain." ”

Cai Jing said, "Explain the explanation."

Jiao De said: "The East Garden is full of trees and looks like clouds. The people of West Park are displaced, homeless, and tears are pouring down. Today we are all West Park people."

Cai Jing was upset when he heard this, and said to Jiao De, "Wait, interrupt." Are you teaching me to do things? ”

Very suddenly, with a snap, 18 bronze men with chainsaws rushed over, broke Jiaode's leg, and then arrested Jiaode and put him in prison, making him sing the iron window every day to tears of remorse. [From, Song, Zhou Hui, Qingbo Magazine]

In fact, the Attitude of the Song Dynasty towards Hai You was very relaxed, Ding Xian now stimulated Wang Anshi in various ways, and Song Shenzong wanted to protect Ding Xianxian, including many of the later prime ministers who were ridiculed by Hai You, and there was nothing wrong.

It's just that Cai Jing's pattern is too small and his character is too bad, so he convicted Jiao De. What kind of person Cai Jing is, everyone is also clear, and the masses express basic understanding.

Jiao De, as a lowly man, has left his mark on history by relying on his enthusiasm and sense of justice. As for whether Jiao De died because of this incident, I have not found the exact information.

I am a prince, and I will often share humorous methods, funny history and things.

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