Parents always want to give their children the best, do their best to hold everything they have in front of their children, and children are happy and happy, which is the pursuit of parents.
Since ancient times, China has felt that there are many children and many blessings, and the import of Tim Ting is a happy event, so the early Chinese family population is huge, a family has many children, and the parents' care for the children is scattered, and they cannot take care of the children wholeheartedly in order to make a living.
After the widespread implementation of family planning, from several children in a family to one child in a family, parents put all their energy and thoughts on this child.
Children have a happy family life, but the consequences of this excessive care and intervention have caused many children to be immature, not independent, have low living ability, and even become "giant babies".
In the United States, there is such a "giant baby", 33 years old is still wearing diapers, even eating and sleeping by coaxing, has been living in the baby's world.
American "giant baby" who refuses to grow up
Born in the United States, Jack lives in a happy and loving family, and his parents take good care of him and pamper him to the tip of his heart, so that he has always lived a life of eating and opening his mouth to reach out, and he has always enjoyed this life very much.
In the eyes of his parents, the child is always young and never has the ability to take care of himself, so Jack is in the heart of his parents, he has always been a small child.
Even though Jack is 33 years old, with a large body, bloated and obese, but he wears diapers every day, even the basic daily toilet can not be done, eating parents to feed into the mouth one bite at a time, and even sometimes throwing a tantrum and not eating, and having to coax it to eat.
A tall, 33-year-old man dressed in diapers, sleeping to pat, coax, story to listen to singing. He has normal intelligence, but he has not been to school, and he does not know how to work to achieve self-worth. For him, he was still a baby, eating and drinking every day, wrapping a pacifier, stacking Lego, this is a normal life.
He refused to grow up, and his parents didn't give him a chance to grow up.
The sadness of a parasitic life
Whose fault is this sadness?
This kind of extreme laissez-faire and spoiling, only raising and not breeding, what is the difference between raising livestock and raising livestock? It only provides children with food and clothing but does not teach children the life skills for growth, and even deprives children of the right to education, isolates children's desire to explore the world, and uses the big hand that calls itself "love" to cover the child's inner world, firmly controlling the child in the incompetent, ignorant, fearless and helpless baby world, falling into a lifetime.
For Jack, even though he is 33 years old, a normal man may be married and have children, have a steady career, and live a happy life, while he has always felt that he is a baby, he "enjoys" everything his parents give him, and relies on everything his parents give him. I don't know that the "sweet" cage that his parents cast for him will be the beginning of his endless abyss at the moment of his parents' death.
I think no parent really wants their children to become "giant babies", and so do Jack's parents, so what can be done to avoid children from "parasitizing" their parents' lives?
Valuing children's ability to be independent
The history of Jack's growth in the United States is undoubtedly extreme, even if there are many parents who love their children, they will not really let their children go to that extent, and the original intention of parents is to hope that their children will live better.
In the process of children's growth, independent ability can not be ignored, independent ability includes independent thinking, independent life, and even digesting negative emotions alone.
Let go appropriately and let the child try new things on their own, from eating and dressing themselves to tidying up the clothes in the room. In this process, do not dislike children for not doing well, invite them to participate in daily life together, discover the fun of these things together, and share the joy and sense of accomplishment after things are completed.
And this also requires more parents to let go and tolerate, tolerance for them to do badly, tolerance for their failure parents to deal with "mess". It is even more necessary to have appropriate encouragement to increase their confidence and stimulate their desire to do better and better.
Let the child out and avoid the title of "Mommy Baby"
Now the family, there are many only children, a family even appears 4 elderly people, 2 parents take care of a child together, the child bumped to make the elderly feel the tip of their own heartache, excessive care will only make the child's ability to live is getting lower and lower, but also will cry willfully when the wish is not met.
After all, the competitive society is cruel, without a strong enough survival ability, it is difficult to stand on the society, and the society around it cannot be like your parents, crying and giving you candy, unconditionally satisfying you.
After such children enter the society, they will be brutally hit, and even doubt the beauty of the world, and they are vulnerable in their hearts, and they are likely to go to extreme choices.
Therefore, the parents' big package, spoiled and indulged, those grievances that have not been experienced will eventually be multiplied on the children.
Role models to follow
Developed media, the dissemination of information allows us to understand the information around the world, parents want to successful educational experience, from the book media in the network can understand and learn.
Spoiled behavior often occurs in ordinary families, business tycoons and politicians are very strict about the education of their children, they have experienced the baptism of society, know the cruelty of society, and let children be strong enough to resist these cruel magic weapons, not only the love of parents, but also a strong heart and the ability to be independent and enterprising.
While they let their children get a better education, they also let them experience the hardships of life early, participate in more social activities, contact various groups of people, and make children's hearts rich and tenacious. This is the true love we should give our children.
brief summary:
New parents, confused and unprepared, eager to pick the stars and fish for the moon, but the more loving, the more calm, just because we are in society, experienced pain and heartache to fight loss, we should teach children to overcome these skills.
From the early years of "nibbling on the old people" to today's more "giant babies", the sadness of family education abounds, there are fewer children, but there is no "boutique", this is not the direction of social development, advocate eugenics, but also pay more attention to eugenics, parents will put love in the right direction, with the right method, will raise independent children.
The life of the 33-year-old giant baby is predictable sadness, and we must face up to this vigilance and let the child run freely in his beautiful life journey.