Introduction: Some couples are getting better and better, the feelings of husband and wife are also very good, and some couples are jumping all day long, noisy and noisy, so what is the little secret of getting along with husband and wife?
Many people say that the life after marriage is like a pool of stagnant water, becoming more and more plain. Some people are unwilling and unwilling in this ordinary life, and then try to attract each other's attention in the constant conflict with the other half, but often it backfires, and the relationship between husband and wife is getting worse and worse.
Therefore, it is often seen that many people to middle-aged couples, not lack of money, no lack of housing, no lack of children, just lack of love, began to look for, under the slogan of "can not live in vain" to find the next true love.
There are also some couples who do not plan their family property well when they are young, and when they reach middle age, they are poor and poor, and lack of money means that they have no dignity in many cases, so they go to heaven and earth under the slogan of "poor for a lifetime, a lifetime of suffering, it is time to give themselves a way to live".
In fact, objectively speaking, when the husband and wife establish a marriage relationship, both parties are a community, and both have the responsibility to move forward for the development of the family and a good direction, and here are 3 small suggestions, which may make the family life after marriage more harmonious.
We have a junior high school classmate, call him Xiaotian, the young man is tall and handsome, in the unit was originally quite popular, but now more and more colleagues of the same age do not like to associate with him, the cause is his wife.
Xiaotian's wife is good at everything, that is, watching Xiaotian look too tightly, Xiaotian usually eats and socializes, no matter what the occasion the wife always has to go with, this is nothing. But often go to work to visit the class, affecting the work of colleagues who are small days is not a good thing.
Just like Xiao Tian's colleague said, it is a matter for the two of you to affect the progress of Brother Tian's work, but we still have to support our families, and the progress that affects us cannot be understood, we are not your relatives, and what do your families and disharmony have to do with us.
Xiaotian wife also often check Xiaotian mobile phone, as long as it is to see the group Xiaotian and others have interaction, or there is a separate information exchange, you must play the spirit of Conan, it is bound to find out who this person is, is a man or a woman, if it is a woman, why should anyone not look for you, a smiling expression represents what it means, and so on.
Xiaotian said that he was really tired, but he still had to try to rationalize his wife's doubts, because the explanation was unreasonable, Xiaotian's wife would go to the unit to make a big fuss, and must ask other colleagues who is contacting Xiaotian.
Over time, Xiaotian's work progress was not only dragged down, but even normal colleague interaction was almost gone, and no one dared to take him to dinner or something, for fear of causing a fire. And the female colleagues are even more afraid to provoke his family's vinegar jar, preferring to find other people to dock work tasks, rather than docking with Xiaotian. Over time, Xiaotian's work was facing a state of suspension.
In fact, as women, we all understand Xiaotian's wife's thoughts, she feels that if she grasps it tightly in her hand, Xiaotian will not run away. As everyone knows, sometimes feelings are like sand, and the tighter they are caught, the more they slip.
Due to the long-term interference, Xiaotian's work has been seriously affected, and Xiaotian has also been in a passive state at work, and Xiaotian's inner feelings for his wife are also slowly being tortured and consumed.
Instead of leaving no room for mutual harm, it is better to respect each other, leave space, and support each other, so that it is the correct way for couples to face normal social interaction, rather than perverted control and possessiveness.
The income between husband and wife also needs to be rationally planned, not only to make long-term plans for the future development of the family, but also to ensure that the current living standards and quality of the family cannot be too low.
The income of both husband and wife to do an objective and reasonable plan, first of all, the establishment of family accounts, divided into regular and zero deposits, the money here is mainly used for the savings of large amounts of family funds; secondly, after deducting monthly household expenses and consumption, both husband and wife can obtain a certain amount of pocket money at their disposal, and do not interfere with each other; finally, when the capital savings exceed a certain amount, they can turn to real estate, funds, commercial insurance and other investment projects, so that family assets have a stable appreciation space.
But there are also husband and wife who do not communicate, nor do they have the idea of jointly operating family property, they think about "how to get all the money of the other party into their own hands", and the friend Xiao Zhang and his wife are such a typical example.
Xiao Zhang and his wife are really in front of many peers, the house of the two is bought by Xiao Zhang's parents in full and is responsible for decoration, Xiao Zhang's wife's family sent a car, but also full payment. That is to say, Xiao Zhang and his wife are at least ranked before 80% of their peers, without having to pay off mortgages, car loans, and not to consider how to save every penny to save a down payment to buy a house.
According to the theory, such a life is relatively happy, relatively speaking, there is no burden and pressure on the economy, and the child also has the help of the in-laws to support the belt. However, people's hearts are more greedy, and Xiao Zhang's wife feels that she must control the financial power of the family and turn in her salary card.
At the beginning, Xiao Zhang was also obediently handed in, after 5 months of payment, the family did not buy some large things, but also did not save a penny, Xiao Zhang began to ask his wife where to spend money, Xiao Zhang's wife said what was spent, and said that Xiao Zhang had no ability, the money earned too little, but also asked for money subsidies from his in-laws.
Xiao Zhang felt that something was not quite right, because at the beginning, although the salaries of the two were not handed over to a certain person, they were divided by each other.
Xiao Zhang is mainly responsible for property, water and electricity, buying vegetables and snacks, etc., the wife is mainly responsible for the child's clothes, milk powder, etc., occasionally Xiao Zhang will give his wife hundreds of pieces to buy clothes, in this case, Xiao Zhang himself still saved a sum of money, but after the salary card was handed to his wife, he did not save a penny, and he could not help but start to doubt.
Later, after Xiao Zhang knocked on the side, he learned that his wife had given almost all of the common income of the two to her mother's family and subsidized her family. The wife is still not satisfied, and she still feels that it is not enough, so she wants Xiao Zhang to ask her in-laws for money.
This time Xiao Zhang was completely angry, Xiao Zhang felt, you take your own salary to subsidize your mother's family, I do not interfere, but you take my salary to subsidize my mother's family, and now our small family is not enough to have enough funds and hit my parents' idea, to take my parents' retirement pension money to subsidize your mother's family, is it a little too much?
In fact, Xiao Zhang's wife made a typical mistake, did not make a good plan for the economy of the small family, and the mother's family and the small family could not distinguish between the primary and secondary, so that the husband was suspicious, resulting in the husband's distrust of himself.
The economic planning of small families is very important, and some couples obviously have a low income, but they still have no savings and no assets in middle age, the reason is that they will not plan.
Some couples obviously have a very low starting point, but after continuous sorting, people have a good state in middle age. Therefore, the economic independence between husband and wife is the most important, and the establishment of family accounts and reasonable planning of family assets are king.
There are also some families, both husband and wife are excellent, but did not manage the children much, and finally the children were raised crookedly, and when they reached old age, they had to pay for the children who did not ask questions.
There was an aunt in the family who was busy going to work every day when she was young, and there was really no way to do it at that time, there was no income if she didn't go to work, and there was no way to survive without income.
When the aunt goes to work every day, she gives the child to the mother-in-law to take, and the mother-in-law opens a small shop, and her mind is not on the grandson, so she lets the grandson not get out of sight and play by himself.
The aunt is very tired after work every day, and after picking up the child, she let the child watch TV by herself and let the child play by herself. When I was young, it was not obvious, but when I grew up, I found that children were more addicted to television and entertainment, refused to read books, and had almost no ability to think independently.
The child's grades were not satisfactory, he went to a junior college, and he did not have the ability to find a job after graduation. So the aunt went around asking people to find internship units for the children and find jobs. Her 25-year-old son has not gone out to find a job on his own, and his biggest hobby is the king pesticide.
In fact, the aunt originally planned not to let the children with outstanding grades go to high school, and planned to give him a secondary vocational school to learn a technology, but the aunt's husband did not agree, and the aunt's husband was bent on cultivating the children to become a scientific and technological elite. Therefore, in the case of the child's first college entrance examination only 300 points, still conceited to the child to re-read, must be admitted to undergraduate colleges, the result of re-reading for one year, the second year of the exam 310 points, can only fill in the higher vocational.
After entering a higher job, the aunt's husband still wants to let the child re-read again, and is ready to spend a huge amount of money to let the child go abroad and go to India to learn computers. I was shocked to hear this news, what a distorted concept of education. In the end, I did not go to India, but I took the entrance examination, spent nearly 50,000 yuan to register for the training class, and finally did not get admitted.
This incident also inspired me a lot, because I found that if a family's children are misguided, it is also extremely inattentive for couples.
It is not as good as husband and wife, when the child is young, it is taught according to the aptitude, some children learn culture classes badly, but there are other talents, such as like making food, like clothing, like photography, these are all a survival skill, who said that you must have good academic performance to have a future and a way out. Look at the wood juice after 00, people write their own public accounts, and do self-media are not the same as they can also support themselves.
Therefore, in educating and cultivating children, the couple still has the same concept, and for the family, the cultivation of children is also an important asset.
In the process of getting along with husband and wife, it is also necessary to constantly run into each other and give in to each other. But as a family, the common purpose is to run the family well, becoming more and more promising and competitive.
Therefore, the husband and wife should also constantly reflect on how to run the family well, in many aspects, there must be consensus, there is a bottom line, so that for the family and the individual husband and wife, it is a virtuous circle, and the benefits are quite rich.
[The copyright of this article belongs to "Flower Shadow Story".] The story of the flower shadow, the story of your heart, accompanies you to wake up in the morning light, and sleeps peacefully in the night. 】