The female reader Xiao Yu left me a paragraph and briefly told her story:
She finally walked together with a man who was married and had children at the age of 13, broke through many obstacles, and after the divorce, he also agreed to marry her, but at the moment when the man really proposed a ring to her and she was going to make her dream come true, she flinched.
She said, "I can't tell why, I should have been happy, but I was inexplicably panicked." Am I not confident in feelings or do I find it in my conscience? "
This reminds me of the little three aspiros in "Man to Forty", the young one is a doctor in a psychiatric hospital, fell in love with Liang Guohui, the vice president of the hospital with successful career and first-class medical skills, and after he was diagnosed with lung cancer, he chose to confess to him and was willing to accompany him through this difficult time.
In order to make his life shine again, she made his extramarital lover to give him unlimited tenderness and care, which made Liang Guohui very moved.
In order for her husband's illness to get better faster, out of compassion and inner love, Liang Guohui's wife Zheng Jie acquiesced to the existence of ASUS, but what she did not expect was that Liang Guohui found that it was a benign tumor when he did surgery, and his body recovered after the lesion was removed, and Liang Guohui was faced with the reality of life that "two women he must choose one" and fell into a dilemma.
Asus was reluctant to let go and kept pestering, and under her continuous agitation, Liang Guohui eventually divorced his wife Zheng Jie. When divorced, out of guilt, Liang Guohui agreed to give the house to Zheng Jie, and his son followed her.
Asus had thought that she had won this emotional battle, and was full of confidence that Liang Guohui would give her the marriage she wanted immediately after the divorce.
Unexpectedly, Liang Guohui has been perfunctory and delaying her. After his ex-wife Zheng Jie took the initiative to propose a divorce to let him go, he always felt that it was not a taste in his heart.
He confessed his heart to his friend Yangtze:
When she was not divorced, whenever she saw Asus, it was as if a golden aura shone on the top of her head, and she always felt that her flower was the brightest and most colorful under the sky;
But after the divorce, I felt that the once bleak ex-wife suddenly had a dazzling aura on the top of her head, and the flower of Asus was not necessary to pick.
So, you say how much he loves his ex-wife, it's not, you say he has no feelings for her at all, no, in short, he doesn't cherish it when he holds it in his hand, he loses it and stays nostalgic, a kind of "even if I divorce her, she still has to be my woman", especially after learning that his ex-wife is in love, he overturned the vinegar jar but pretended not to care.
It was not until later that Xiaosan Huashuo was blinded by Liang Guohui's alcoholic brother-in-law because of one eye, and under the guilt and self-blame, he proposed to Asus, saying that no matter whether her eyes could be cured or not, he would be responsible for her.
But after Asus's eyes were transplanted with corneas to cure the light again, Liang Guohui lost the enthusiasm to marry her, although he did not say not to marry her, but it was a kind of reluctance or a sympathy for her rather than love, he was either worried about his ex-wife Zheng Jie all day, or worried about his old father and son, but in the face of his ex-wife, he was very tough and unwilling to show his love for her.
Asus finally understood in the face of his perfunctory behavior again and again, and the powerful reality of his father and son's strong rejection of her:
Although Liang Guohui and his ex-wife divorced, his feelings did not leave her, she lived with him for so many years, and there is a son, the traces of their once life can never be erased from Liang Guohui's heart, and his ex-wife Zheng Jie is like an invisible third party, posing a huge threat to her.
At this time, she realized how fragile her love with Liang Guohui, who had no real life foundation and floated in the air, could not rival his and his ex-wife's deep marital love for many years, as well as the affection that grew in the cracks of bones.
In pain, she found Liang Guohui's ex-wife Zheng Jie, apologized to Zheng Jie and confessed to her her failure and inability to do anything:
The person Liang Guohui really loves is you, not me, and I want to return her to you.
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In this battle, she conceded defeat. But Zheng Jie said: Give it back to me? What do you take back?! I'm not interested in what you two love, but this man, I'm not going to pick it up.
Well, he has nothing to do with me, does he love you to me? That old bone, if you like it, keep it and keep playing, I don't care.
Asus really regrets it, regrets how did he get confused and had to rob a man with Zheng Jie? Regret that he is too naïve, think that youth is the greatest capital, and awaken to self-blame for his former naivety.
She broke someone else's family to pieces, thinking that by grabbing the man she had seized the beautiful love and future, she spread her hands and found that there was nothing empty inside.
Recognizing the reality, she proposed to Liang Guohui to break up, Liang Guohui did not fall in love, as if it was the expected ending, just waiting for her to take the initiative to leave, so that she no longer carried this huge psychological burden.
But when Asus really left, his heart was deeply sorry and regretful for her decision to leave.
Did you find it? What kind of woman is most attractive in a man's heart? When a woman is not entangled or in love, that is, when he can not always grasp the most attractive.
The matter of two women competing for a man always follows such a law:
At the beginning of the competition drama, in the face of the aggressive little three, most of the original partners panicked, clinging to it, all kinds of retention, weakness, low posture, hoping to evoke the man's pity psychology, hate the husband's lover itchy teeth;
The lover is determined to win, feeling that he is young and beautiful, and the man is blind if he does not choose himself.
But once the original should see the true face of the man to choose the long pain is not as good as the short pain, fiercely determined to let the man go in the case of firmly grasping the property and children, the man who gets free will be disappointed to find that the woman outside is not much interesting except for being young, and it is not cost-effective to exchange for such freedom at the cost of abandoning the family, so it will suffer from loss, remembering the good of the original match, and began to have doubts about remarrying the wife, is it worth it?
In a word, for a man, when he's important in your eyes, you're not important. When he is not important in your eyes, you are important.
Men who are not willing to divorce you, 100% do not love you, men who are willing to divorce you, do not necessarily love you, it is possible that he is forced to choose helplessly:
Because, when the woman in the marriage can no longer bear to drive him out of the house, he has to leave without leaving, so after leaving, he continues to fool you, and it is better to have someone around to play warmly than to step on the air and be alone and self-pity.
Desperate men are not terrible, infatuated men are not terrible, afraid of this kind of man who can not forget the past, but also do not plan well for the future, always swinging and tangled between the former and the current, more than women suffer from gains and losses, whether you are married or unmarried, once encountered, you can take a detour.