At five o'clock in the afternoon, the elder sister called and talked about her nephew, who was almost 20 years old.
I was three years apart from my sister, a 70-tailer, a 80-year-old, and we came out of the most rural place, and our parents were the most honest farmers. I often think: after graduating from college, we can settle down in this city, live and work stably, achieve this kind of class leap, no longer continue to be like our parents for most of the 365 days, facing the loess back to the sky to do farm work, but we can sit in the office, winter is not cold and summer is not hot, feel very good. It is really not easy, because our starting point is so low, the insight is so little, and through reading, we are completely different from the world of our parents.
Well, at least my sister and I are still the kind of people who can read, and if I can't read, I don't know what kind of life it will be.
The sister said: "Mother said that Xiao Xu is more than thirty years old, and she has not heard others say that she is not yet married."
Me: "What are you talking about with your mother, talking about such a topic?" ”
Because of this name, it almost does not appear in ordinary chats. Xiao Xu is the son of my cousin, my cousin should be in her 50s now, more than twenty years have passed, because of the grudges of the previous generation, we have not interacted. But the memory of the hour, watching her marry and have a child, I know it.
Me: "Didn't Xiao Xu go to college, I heard that it seems that the situation is still good, why are you not married in your 30s?" ”
Sister: "Mom said that it is not easy to get married in the countryside now, first of all, the boy himself has good conditions, people must not look too bad, they must have ability, and then the family is also economically good, in the city or at home to have a house and a car, but also hundreds of thousands of dowries."
I have heard my mother say this market earlier. The son of the neighbor next to his hometown also went to college, and the family's economic conditions are still very good, but because he is relatively short, more than thirty years old, the family has engaged in many blind dates, and there are no results. Last year, it was hard to finally get married. I heard that the house and the car have it, and there is a bride price, the neighbors said that there is only 200,000 for the girl, but the mother said that the insider said that it should be more than 300,000 dowry.
My mother said that in this era, if you don't have the ability to do it yourself, the family is not very good, you really can only beat the bare stick. One fact that her 70-somethings are aware of is that there is an imbalance between men and women. There are more boys and fewer girls, and if the men themselves are not excellent, then they must be left behind: the survival of the fittest!
Well, the topic returns to the reason why my sister called me. Mom said that the brother is only more than forty years old this year, the last time she came back, she saw that the hair in the middle of the brother's head was gone, and the burden of the family was all carried on him alone, getting up early and greedily running taxis, and every night until twelve o'clock before going home to rest. Looking at my brother like this, my mother was very unhappy.
My brother graduated from junior high school, he was very handsome when he was young, he wrote well, if he had a diploma or a background at home or he was bolder, there should be a very different fate. I only remember the red and white happy events in the village at that time, as long as he was at home, the couplets were written by him. Because he was victimized by martial arts novels in junior high school, he failed to go to high school as he wished. Our brother opened a small department store in a relatively remote part of the city, because of the rise of the Internet, the business itself is not good, and I still don't know if I can still make rent money. In the first few years, it was the brother and the sister-in-law to see the store together, the sister-in-law only had primary school culture, the purchase of goods will not be, the back slowly familiar, the business is not good, the brother will give the store to the sister-in-law, and then go to engage in other livelihoods. After several turnsaround to the present open taxi. It should be said that the taxi can still make some money by opening a small shop, but because it can be operated by changing a car, the cost is also very large. Brother said that every day is very hard to do, but also depends on the luck problem, a better month, deduct the platform fee oil cost, at most it is more than 10,000 pieces a little. This should have been paid for 12 hours or more.
Because of the dissatisfaction and urging of his sister-in-law, and because of his nephew's growth (later as a marriage house), the brother tried his best to take out a down payment and bought a house in the city, with a total price of more than 1.3 million. Today my sister chatted with me, saying that the brother's house was bought big, bought so big, what to spend so much money on, ten thousand flat, more than 130 flat, when buying it, do not discuss it with us. I'm under so much pressure now.
Well, all of the above is actually not the focus of what my sister and I are going to say today, and the focus of today's discussion is on my nephew.
The nephew is almost 20 years old, and he is nearly 1.8 meters tall, but he should weigh more than 200. After graduating from junior high school, I barely spent money to read a 5-year vocational school connected with a high school and a specialty, which is auto repair, and then after graduation, the school arranged work without waiting, and then followed the acquaintance's auto repair shop as an apprentice, giving 800 per month, and then rising to 1200. After learning estimates for more than a year, we said that if there is no wage increase, it is recommended to change places, because the basic things will also be gone, and there will be no more advanced things to teach, the boss must keep his job, and no wage increase is a cheap labor force. Then stay at home now, ready to finish the driver's license and then change places. The waiter has been at home for many months, and my brother has been getting up early and running outside for life, and does not have the time and energy to communicate too much with such a big son. Therefore, in addition to the matter of taking the driver's license, other times should be accompanied by the game network. Usually like to drink drinks and eat snacks (open their own department store, convenient), I have a few videos, is to watch him get fatter and fatter (this fat, I have always felt that there is a certain causal relationship with him when he drank too many carbonated drinks when he was a child).
Because I have two children and no one to help, time and energy to deal with my two divine beasts are slightly difficult, so I have a heart for my nephew but are powerless. Some time ago I told my sister-in-law in WeChat that she should deliberately cultivate her nephew's sense of responsibility and responsibility, as long as he can do the work at home, let him do it, can not let him idle, let him have work in his eyes, after all, so old, a few years is to find the age of marriage, can not still be like a child, will not understand anything. The sister-in-law said that she pushed down and told him to do it, but it also depends on the mood, the mood is good, and sometimes she loses her temper after saying a few words, and her temper is as grumpy as her own.
Sister-in-law, we have no intention of looking down on her, but it is true that she can't do anything in educating children, and my brother has this ability but doesn't have this time. Why is she unable to exert herself? Because of her own cognition and cultural level there, when she was young, she quarreled with my brother, her temper was very violent, and she only knew that according to her own nature, if she did not go according to her own wishes, then brute force solved, and the knife thing happened several times, the most serious one was that one of my brother's tendons was cut off. It is said that the hand that pushes the world is the hand that pushes the cradle, and if the sister-in-law can play some key role in inspiring him in the process of his nephew's growth, he may also be more thoughtful. What the sister-in-law can give is to take care of him, so that he can eat, drink and dress well. Regarding spiritual things, it is obvious that this is also a high demand for her in itself. I was thinking, maybe my nephew is almost 20 years old, what kind of life he wants to live, this question he did not ask himself. A person who does not love to read or think, who has not been inspired by some famous books, who has not made comparisons with excellent peers, who has not gone through some big world, whose thoughts have not gone through powerful shocks and gaps, who has not suffered any hardships in life, who has not been beaten by the world, who has not faced the experience of facing cruel reality, and who has no dreams, how can he possibly think about this problem.
And now there are young people in a state like nephews, especially in the countryside, I think there should be quite a lot.
The main thing my sister called me was: My mother is now worried about the future state of her nephew, what should I do if I can't marry a wife? Maybe this is the biggest heart disease when my parents leave this world one day. She talked to me and said: Do you want to stop letting him go to school for a few years? Or let him learn something? I said, read, can you read it? Learn something more, maybe you can, what you want to do depends on whether he has ideas or not, and the most we can help is limited financial support.
In my heart, I also feel a little guilty about my nephew, because of my lack of ability, if I am stronger, I may be able to give him a better growth environment, or on his growth path, I can also give him more guidance. Nephews are essentially not lazy, but their cognition is too simple, they lack a spiritual engine, and they live to almost twenty years old. My mother, who is in her 70s, worries that her grandson will not be able to marry his wife, and this worry is very normal. Extrapolating, even if my nephew gets a driver's license, then, what can I do next? What will be done? If you change to another auto repair job, the salary will be increased to 3000 at most, and I think it should be less than this salary in our place. That unless he can be very serious and smart in this process of work and learning, accumulate knowledge and experience and even contacts, for his own use later or open a similar shop, but if he has this kind of cognition, we don't have to worry about it here.
Life is like this, no matter what era, you have to work hard to fight for it, choose Ge Youliang, don't mind not being able to go far away. My nephews who are sleeping in the game, if you don't work hard yourself, how can you support your family? How to take on the big responsibility? How can shoulders provoke the happiness of a beautiful girl's life?