Photo of Xu Jikai
The Sino-Japanese War broke out, the situation changed, the war was agitated, and the whole of China was struggling.
Three years later, a cry came out of nowhere, making a rich merchant's house in a corner of Jiangnan, in the dark and chaotic years, the whole family up and down, happy.
This baby is Xu Jikai's biological father and xu Zhimo, a representative poet of the modern Chinese Crescent School.
"Gently I go, just as I come softly; I beckon softly, as the clouds of the western sky are gone." This popular parting poem was written by Xu Zhimo.
As everyone knows, this generation of talented Republic of China poets eventually died because of love. His lifelong obsession with three women is also like his poems, which can be described as a household name and well-known.
Although Xu Zhimo treats marriage and feelings "two or three virtues" and does not have the firmness of the end, his son Xu Jikai only loved one person in his life, and gave his wife Zhang Puwen the romance of his life.
Xu Jikai and Zhang Puwen
For the father and son's very different attitudes towards marriage and love, we can find out from the trajectory of their lives.
Xu Zhimo's ancestral home is in Huaxiang, Haiyan County, in this beautiful land of fish and rice, Xu Zhimo was born in one of the richest merchants in the local area three years after the outbreak of the First Afternoon.
Xu Zhimo's father was Xu Rushan, then president of the Kip shek Chamber of Commerce, who was born to Xu Rushen's second wife and the first son of Xu's father.
Xu Zhimo's birth made the whole family rejoice, which can be described as the treatment of the stars holding the moon, so Xu Zhimo's childhood was mostly an innocent and carefree life.
Although the Xu family is rich and compelling, it lacks valuable literary talents. Xu Zhimo once mentioned in the "Tiger Collection": "Since Yongle, I have not written a single line of poetry in my family that can be recited. ”
Because of this, and in addition to the fact that Xu Zhimo was called a monk by a monk at the age of one year, "he will become a great instrument in the future", whether it is out of the hope that Xu Zhimo will "learn and excel" or hope that his son will inherit his father's business and become rich and save the country after the abolition of the imperial examination, Xu Shenru attaches great importance to his academic education.
Xu Zhimo's father- Xu Shenru
The love of family relatives, the wealth and care of life, coupled with the study and edification of thought and education, laid an important foundation for Xu Zhimo's future character development, and also laid the groundwork for his later love epic.
Xu Zhimo has been mischievous since childhood, but he has a very high level of understanding and is a rare genius.
At that time, When Zhang Junjie, who was the political figure at that time and later the chairman of the China Democratic Socialist Party, was a guest in the principal's office of Hangzhou No. 1 Middle School, he was attracted by an article "On the Relationship between Novels and Society", and saw "Radium Ingots and the History of the Earth", with a happy face, claiming to praise the student's sense of social responsibility and broad knowledge.
This middle school student who skillfully wrote literature, society and science is Xu Zhimo.
Zhang Junjie
Zhang Junjie invited Xu Zhimo to talk, and his elegant appearance and articulate literary eloquence frequently praised Zhang Junjie, and coupled with his family's solid wealth, Zhang Junjie chose what he thought was a ruyi brother-in-law for his sister Youyi.
Since then, Xu Zhimo has tied a "trouble knot".
Xu Zhimo, under the arrangement of Xu Zhang's parents, reluctantly married Zhang Youyi, so a feudal arranged marriage in the new era was achieved again.
Xu Zhimo's marriage attitude is based on love, he believes that "husband and wife rely on love to combine, with love, there is real happiness to speak of." ”
On the day of his wedding, Xu Zhimo, who was free by nature and had a lofty yearning for love, was tired and sad when he thought that he was going to marry a woman he never knew.
When the cave house was spent with candles, the relatives and friends ran to the cave room, but found that the groom was not in the room and could not find anyone everywhere. When his father was angry and worried, Xu Zhimo hid in his mother's old house, plugged in the door, turned off the lights, did not care about himself, and slept high.
Photo of Zhang Youyi
After marriage, Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi respect each other like guests, without quarrels or lingering warm love. Soon after, Xu Zhimo embarked on the road of studying abroad, leaving Zhang Youyi alone in his hometown desolate and indifferent.
At the London Association of International Leagues, Xu Zhimo got to know Lin Changmin and Lin Huiyin's father and daughter, and Lin Huiyin's eyes with a flexible and rhymed eye and the talent of both Chinese and Western literature deeply attracted Xu Zhimo.
The two of them danced at the dance party and were each other's regular dance partners; they talked about writing and writing poetry under the moon before the flower, and they were each other's literary friends and confidants; they traveled to Kangqiao, flirted, and fell in love with each other.
It is precisely because of Xu Zhimo's extreme yearning and desire for love, so when he met Lin Huiyin and tasted the sweetness of love for the first time, he resolutely returned to China and filed a divorce with Zhang Youyi, although he risked the great disobedience of the times, he was also willing to love and did not quit.
Lin Huiyin photo
However, Lin Hui's attitude towards feelings and marriage is much more rational than Xu Zhimo's, she does not have Xu Zhimo's strong pursuit of romanticism, even if Xu Zhimo, as her first love, is hot and lingering, she can stabilize the beating heart and calmly analyze it.
So later Lin Huiyin said to his daughter: "Xu Zhimo did not love the real me, but Lin Huiyin he imagined with the romantic emotions of a poet." ”
Throughout Xu Zhimo's life, he is too romanticized, which led to the ups and downs of his love and marriage, and even indirectly caused his own death.
Lin Liang's marriage was originally like a dead heart, and it was ignited by a generation of famous women Lu Xiaoman. Therefore, Xu Zhimo ignored the opposition of his family and his mentor Liang Qichao and resolutely married Lu Xiaoman into the family.
Lu Xiaoman photo
At that time, Lu Xiaoman was "a scenery that Beijing had to see", she loved poetry and painting, good at singing and dancing, and enjoying fun, but under the arranged marriage of her parents, she married Wang Geng, an army colonel who later served as the deputy commander of the Protection Army of the Ministry of Communications of the Republic of China.
Lu Xiaoman, who is playful in literature and art, is naturally incompatible with Wang Geng, who has a strong sense of enterprise.
Wang Geng and Xu Zhimo are old friends, and when he is busy with official duties, he will always ask Xu Zhimo to accompany Xiao Man to play.
In this way, Xu Zhimo, whose marriage was loveless and fruitless, and Lu Xiaoman, who was equally unhappy in marriage, found each other's emotional comfort and spiritual mate, and the two secretly and clearly had feelings and were out of control.
After a disaster relief charity performance, Lu Xiaoman invited Xu Zhimo to eat snacks. Although Xu Zhimo saw that the time of the watch was eleven o'clock in the evening, he still readily agreed.
The two walked into a café drinking milk and talking about poetry, which made Lu Xiaoman excited. Suddenly Xu Zhimo said to Lu Xiaoman: "It is too late at night when I go back, will Mr. Wang..."
When Lu Xiaoman heard this, he didn't raise his head, but just stirred the milk with a silver spoon in his hand and said lightly: "In our conversation, it is best not to mention him." ”
Lu Xiaoman's first husband, Wang Geng ( Wang Geng )
Xu Zhimo's heart trembled, and he deeply felt the similarity between Lu Xiaoman and himself. He used his ideal method to solve the knot of his reality, and also wanted to help Xiao Man to be rescued from the depths of loveless marriage.
So that night, Xu Zhimo "Kiss the fire", with a deep and long kiss, broke out a thunderous thunder to the society.
He took a married woman away from her husband, who loved her dearly. Although Xu Lu and Xu Lu were criticized at that time, the two of them still felt that their marriage was nourished by love and was very sweet.
I thought that Xu Zhimo would accept this and live peacefully and lovingly with Lu Xiaoman, but Bacon said: "Once love interferes with emotions, it will hinder people from firmly running towards the established goal." Obviously, Xu Zhimo is like this.
In the autumn of 1931, Xu Zhimo went to Beiping to visit Lin Huiyin, who was recuperating, and laughed with her and made her happy. Later, on November 20, at an external academic lecture by Lin Huiyin, Xu Zhimo promised to help her plan.
In order to attend the appointment on time, Xu Zhimo, who was affectionate and trustworthy, used a free flight ticket to catch the Jinan post plane from Nanjing to Beiping, and also took his life.
Xu Zhimo's mentor Liang Qichao once advised him: "If you are obsessed with the inevitable dream, you will have setbacks several times, and your business will be exhausted... Immortality and non-birth and degeneration to the point of no longer being able to extricate oneself. ”
Photo of Liang Qichao
It turned into a slur, foreshadowing Xu Zhimo's future life. When the plane was close to Jinan, the mountain crashed, and Xu Zhimo, who was running for love, died in the sky chasing love with a bang.
Hu Shi once said: "Genius dies, and what is lost is Chinese literature." But the reason why a genius is a genius is precisely because of his almost obsessive romantic feelings, it can be said that he is talented by love and is killed by love.
Xu Zhimo, whenever he talks about him, in addition to his outstanding talent and literary achievements, always inevitably connects him with love.
It is said that love makes people stupid, and even Shakespeare once said, "Love is blind." "Since ancient times, heroes have been sad to pass the beauty pass, and the literati have difficulty in resisting the disaster of beauty."
Xu Zhimo has been affectionate all his life, and every woman who has a story with her is beautiful, but in the end, he is not blessed to enjoy the beauty of love all his life, and only ends up dying young.
Zhang Youyi and Xu Zhimo
When everyone knows the kang bridge song, don't look at the old people and the new people.
As the eldest son of Xu Zhimo (Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi also had a son, who died young due to illness), Xu Jikai inherited his father's talent in addition to inheriting his father's love for beautiful women.
But the two kinds of inheritance are very different.
Xu Zhimo loves beauty, a short life, entangled with three people. Xu Jikai died in his hundred years, but from beginning to end, he only loved one person plainly and appropriately.
Xu Jikai and Zhang Puwen wedding photos
First Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi divorced, and later Xu Zhimo died, and most of Xu Jikai was raised by Zhang Youyi.
Xu Jikai reached the marriageable age, and Zhang Youyi once asked her son what kind of partner he liked. Xu Jikai, who has always been kind and intelligent, said to his mother very directly and frankly: "I don't have any other requirements, as long as people look beautiful." ”
When Zhang Youyi heard it, his heart suddenly palpitated, and he thought that Xu Zhimo also loved beautiful women, and he was worried that Xu Jikai would follow in Xu Zhimo's footsteps.
But Zhang Youyi's worries are completely unnecessary, because Xu Jikai is not a Romantic poet of Xu Zhimo, he is a pragmatic businessman.
He did not understand the deep rhymes and poems that his father was obsessed with, and he chose civil engineering at first just to lighten his mother's burden, and then because of his life and career, he entered the business.
Although Zhang Youyi was worried about her son's mate selection criteria, she still tried her best to find a beautiful girl for her son, Zhang Puwen.
Photo by Zhang Puwen
As soon as Xu Jikai saw the pavilion, the graceful Zhang Puwendang fell in love.
Although Xu Jikai and Zhang Puwen also met through people's media, the two at that time were in love at first sight, talked about free love for three years, and then walked into the palace of marriage hand in hand and identified this life as each other's partners.
Instead of being like Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi, who had never seen it before, they hurriedly formed together, and it was no wonder that Xu Zhimo was sad.
Xu Zhimo is to see a love, pour out one heart, and his son Xu Jikai is married to one person and loves for a lifetime.
At that time, Zhang Youyi had grown up from the failed marriage with Xu Zhimo, and she knew that the synchronization of husband and wife could only be long-lasting. Therefore, Zhang Youyi, who was worried about Zhang Puwen's footsteps, invited a tutor for Zhang Puwen to teach her to learn various cultural knowledge.
With the help of her mother-in-law Zhang Youyi, Zhang Puwen is proficient in Chinese, English, German and French, and has become a woman with both talent and appearance, which has also made the husband and wife relationship between Zhang Puwen and Xu Jikai have always been very good.
Xu Jikai, who inherited the excellent genes of his father Xu Zhimo, needed to continue to study abroad because of his talent and intelligence and academic achievements. Upon learning of this news, Zhang Youyi took on the burden of taking care of her grandchildren's lives and asked Zhang Puwen to go with Xu Jikai.
Xu Jikai and Zhang Puwen, who are well aware of their mother's good intentions, are deeply moved and determined to study hard and live up to their mother's wishes and dedication.
After going abroad, Zhang Puwen studied design and became a well-known fashion designer. Xu Jikai looked at Zhang Puwen, who had grown up along the way, and his heart was full of relief and appreciation, and he cherished her even more.
Zhang Puwen's costume design
Later, Zhang Youyi's company encountered a crisis, the business was damaged, and Xu Jikai and his wife also became embarrassed.
In order for Xu Jikai to continue to complete his studies with peace of mind, Zhang Puwen took the initiative to leave the school early. She entered the society to do all kinds of odd jobs, swallowed all kinds of bitterness, and only to support her husband to study.
For his wife's silent and silent efforts, Xu Jikai all looked in his eyes, remembered them in his heart, and promised Zhang Puwen: "In this life, he will never fail his wife." Xu Jikai did exactly what he said, he firmly clung to Zhang Chuwen's hand, and he grew old with her to the white head.
In addition to falling in love with his wife, the loyal and unswerving love is commendable, and Xu Jikai is also understanding and open-minded in the face of his mother's later encounter with his own happiness in life.
After Zhang Youyi divorced Xu Zhimo, he wandered alone for most of his life, and finally met Su Jizhi, a good person in his life, at the time of middle age. But the first thing she thought of was not to fight for her love, but to ask her son and brother what she thought.
Xu Jikai replied in a letter from his mother's careful inquiry: "The mother's duty has been exhausted, the mother's heart should be comforted, who comforts the mother's clan, who accompanies the mother's clan?" If the mother is a man, the child asks the father to do things..." The sentences are full of sincere concern for the mother, hoping that the mother will also have the happiness of marriage and love that truly belongs to herself.
It is enough to see Xu Jikai's enlightened attitude towards the achievement of a happy love marriage.
The left one is Xu Jikai, and the right one is Zhang Youyi
Xu Zhimo, an amorous poet of the new era, has a life as short as a meteor, but the history of love is as profound as a meteorite falling.
On the other hand, his son Xu Jikai, who lived a long life, did not have a vigorous and stirring love, nor did his father pursue his fantasy love like a romantic poem he wrote, but lived his life plainly and happily.
Returning to see the scene when Xu Jikai "grabbed the week" for a hundred days, he used his young little hand to grasp Xu Zhimo's brush with a trembling in the measuring scale, copper plate, abacus and the brush used by Xu Zhimo.
At that time, it could be said that the Xu family was overjoyed, and Xu Shenru thought that the Xu family would produce another famous reader. But Xu Jikai was completely contrary to his father, and he did not feel poetry from beginning to end, but like his mother, he had made a difference in business.
Zhang Youyi and Xu Jikai
These dramatic portrayals are the true reflection of the completely different attitudes of Xu Zhimo and Xu Jikai's father and son towards marriage.
The father and son of Xu Zhimo and Xu Jikai were destined to have different life trajectories and marital statuses from birth.
Xu Zhimo grew up free and unrestrained, and when he was young, he rarely worried about his livelihood, and only knew that he was floating in the world of poetry.
Xu Jikai has followed his mother since childhood, and he knows the hardships of his mother alone after his parents divorced, and he has also chosen his studies in advance for life, and he only knows the happiness brought by the actual harvest.
Hu Shi once summed up Xu Zhimo's outlook on life: "His outlook on life is really a simple belief, and there are only three big words in it: one is love, one is freedom, and the other is beauty. ...... The history of his life is only the history of his pursuit of this simple faith. ”
Xu Jikai's outlook on life is: beauty, pragmatism, and loyalty.
Therefore, Xu Zhimo's idealistic outlook on life has created his romantic view of love, making him spend his whole life chasing love. Xu Jikai's realistic outlook on life has created his loyal and unswerving concept of love and marriage, making him guard a love all his life.
Xu Jikai's family