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Mr. and Mrs. Gong Hanlin with their son and daughter-in-law
According to the latest statistics from the Ministry of Civil Affairs, in 2014, a total of 3.637 million divorces were registered in accordance with the law, of which the "post-80s" group accounted for one-third. Many "post-80s" are deeply afraid of marriage, and their parents are anxious and miserable.
Gong Hanlin, a performance artist with both virtue and art, has also had similar troubles. In 2014, just as Gong Hanlin was preparing for the wedding of his only son, Gong Tiankuo, his son suddenly refused to marry. After the entanglement and distress, Gong Hanlin wisdom opened a marriage school and became the principal himself, educating his son and daughter-in-law to enter the marriage with a mature attitude, so as to harvest happiness...
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="4" > "Dad supports you in love with her"</h1>
In December 2012, the TV series "Choice Before Dawn" was launched in Zhongshan, Guangdong Province, and Gong Hanlin and his son Gong Tiankuo played a pair of uncles and nephews in the play. During the 3-month long shooting, Gong Tiankuo and the beautiful actress Huang Yihui, who played the opposite role, exchanged feelings. In March 2013, "Choice Before Dawn" was completed, and Gong Tiankuo officially announced to his father: "Dad, Huang Yihui is my girlfriend. ”
Gong Tiankuo
The son is at least 27 years old, and he has already reached the age of marriage. Over the years, the son has been in contact with two girls, and they have been vetoed by Gong Hanlin: a girl who has known her son for 3 months, asks Gong Hanlin for filming, appearance opportunities, and bargains with the director under gong Hanlin's signboard; the other has not been in contact with his son for a long time, knocking on the side to ask Gong Tiankuo how many assets there are in the family, how many rings will be bought in the future wedding house, and what brand of wedding car to prepare. Gong Hanlin gave his son a preventive injection: "The motives of these two girls to interact with you are not pure, and the love is not you, but the family background." Son, they're not for you. "Father is a person who comes over, seeing people more accurately than himself, Gong Tiankuo withdrew and retreated...
Although in the same crew, Gong Hanlin did not know Huang Yihui. What kind of a girl is she? How much of her true love for her son is there? One question after another condensed into a knot in Gong Hanlin's heart. Therefore, Gong Hanlin did not show the surprise of his son's imagination: "Tiankuo, back to Beijing, dad wants to meet Xiao Huang." ”
On April 9, 2013, Gong Tiankuo brought Huang Yihui to his home to meet his parents. The Gong family has an unwritten rule: whenever important guests visit, Gong Hanlin cooks himself. On this day, Gong Hanlin wore a white chef's hat and a coffee-colored apron and made a full table of dishes. During the banquet, Gong Hanlin talked and laughed, and gave Huang Yihui cloth dishes with his wife Jinzhu. The warm and harmonious atmosphere eases Huang Yihui's restraint.
Huang Yihui
Huang Yihui is a Shandong girl, Xiao Gong Tiankuo 6 years old, graduated from the Acting Department of the Central Academy of Drama a year ago, participated in ten film and television dramas such as "Fake Hero", "Chinese Partner", "Red Face Sharp Arrow" and so on, and is a rising star in the show business circle. After the meal, 4 people gathered together to pull home, Gong Hanlin introduced his son's advantages and disadvantages to Huang Yihui, hoping that she would be more tolerant. Immediately after that, his words turned sharply: "Although I have a certain network in the show business circle, I can't help you in my career." And our family has a lot of money and doesn't have much savings. ”
It turned out that Gong Hanlin's center of gravity fell here! Huang Yihui was a little unhappy: "Uncle Gong, I have seen people's hearts for a long time, I am not the kind of girl you imagine." In the evening, Gong Tiankuo drove Huang Yihui home, and she said angrily: "Your father misunderstood me, I have no utilitarian heart in love with you, if I want to find a 'rich second generation' to be a boyfriend, it is not a difficult thing." Gong Tiankuo recounted his previous experience of interacting with the two girls, and said with emotion: "Now many girls are looking for boyfriends, and they really regard each other's family lineage, wealth, and status as more important than themselves. Huang Yihui suddenly realized and understood Gong Hanlin's pain...
Since then, Huang Yihui has not been influenced by Gong Hanlin's attitude and has frequent exchanges with Gong Tiankuo. The two sang together, watched musicals, braved the drizzle to volunteer at the orphanage... In July 2013, Gong Hanlin asked his son: "You have been in a relationship with Xiaohuang for several months, you should know something about her." What kind of person is she? Gong Tiankuo said truthfully: "Yihui is simple and simple, and regards material as very light." She never asked me for gifts, we ate out together, and she stuck to the AA system. Gong Hanlin thought to himself, he still can't fully understand a person for a few months, maybe Xiao Huang still has some reservations. Gong Hanlin reminded his son: "You are only in the stage of communication with Xiaohuang now, don't rush to conclusions." Gong Tiankuo complained about his father's many hearts.
Gong Tiankuo and his mother
From August of this year, Gong Hanlin found that his son was no longer spending money and knew how to be frugal. Once, Gong Hanlin and his son were invited to be guests at Beijing Television, and Gong Tiankuo took a reward of 2,000 yuan and immediately deposited it on his bank card. Gong Hanlin quipped, "You're saving up money for love, right?" Gong Tiankuo seriously told his father: "Dad, Yihui and I have discussed well, and we will buy the marriage house ourselves in the future, and now we will start to save the down payment together." This incident touched Gong Hanlin greatly, and he began to look at Huang Yihui with another eye.
This year's National Day, Gong Hanlin attended a circle party, a director said about some young actors now, quite critical: "Some in order to receive the drama, try every means to make up a network of relationships, saying who is their relatives, who they are introduced." Huang Yihui just cooperated with him in a play, Gong Hanlin mistakenly thought that the other party was innuendoing her, and whispered: "Is it Xiao Huang who makes you upset?" The director was surprised: "How do you know her?" "She and Tiankuo are in love."
The other party did not hesitate to praise the words: "Xiao huang's acting skills are good, he can bear hardships, he is low-key, and he has never revealed this relationship to me." Peeping at the leopard in the tube, Gong Hanlin finally understood what kind of girl Huang Yihui was. When he returned home that night, he loudly announced to his son: "Tiankuo, Dad has inspected, Xiaohuang is a good girl, I support you to fall in love with her." "Gong Tian's heart is full of flowers...
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="40" > "I'll be the principal of the marriage school."</h1>
Gong Hanlin with his son
Gong Tiankuo was born in 1985, and returned from studying in the United States in 2009 to enter the development of the show business circle. Over the past few years, Gong Tiankuo has played important roles in more than ten film and television dramas such as "Six Dollars and Six Cents", "I Want to Be the Eighth Road", and "New Youth". He has a deep affection for Huang Yihui, and Gong Hanlin and his wife also treat their daughter-in-law as a daughter-in-law.
In order to harmonize the feelings of the family, as long as Huang Yihui does not go out to shoot, Gong Hanlin and his wife will invite her to come to the home as a guest. Every time as soon as she entered the door, the three members of the Gong family were busy: Gong Tiankuo grinded coffee and juice for his girlfriend; Gong Hanlin tied an apron in the kitchen to fry and fry; Jinzhu gave her husband a hand. With a loud voice, she will make her husband put salt, and let him hook up...
Gong Hanlin replied with a good temper: "Got it, ma'am." Each dish came out of the pot, gong Hanlin carried the plate to the living room, let everyone in the family taste it. Gong Tiankuo smiled and said to his girlfriend: "My father plays a little man in the sketch, and there is a basis for life. "The happy and harmonious family atmosphere makes Huang Yihui, who is floating in Beijing, have a sense of home...
Gong Tiankuo and Huang Yihui
In March 2014, Gong Tiankuo was already a 29-year-old guy, and many of his peers had become fathers, and he was also eager to imagine marriage. March 7 is Girls' Day, Gong Tiankuo proposed to his girlfriend: "My goddess, how about marrying me?" Huang Yihui agreed. Subsequently, Gong Tiankuo told his parents the good news, and Gong Hanlin and Jin Zhuxi couldn't help but start busy with their son's marriage.
In mid-May, at the invitation of Gong Hanlin and his wife, the Huang family's parents came to Beijing to discuss their children's marriage. They are all intellectuals, knowledgeable and knowledgeable, and they have a lot of sympathy with Gong Hanlin and his wife. Gong Hanlin proposed that he wanted to do the marriage of the two children within this year. The Huang family's parents have no objection: their daughter is floating alone in Beijing, and they are not at ease; if the daughter becomes a family as soon as possible, she can get the double love of her husband and in-laws.
Next, Gong Hanlin and Jinzhu were busy booking hotels, making invitations, and customizing Tang costumes for their son's wedding. Just when Gong Hanlin and the Huang family's parents agreed on a marriage date, in August of that year, Gong Tiankuo suddenly told his parents: "Parents, I don't want to get married for the time being." Gong Hanlin was astonished: "Tiankuo, what is wrong with you?" Did you get into an awkward fight with Xiao Huang or did you break up? Gong Tiankuo shook his head: "None of them." Then he told his parents why: two of his friends got married at the beginning of the year, one divorced two months ago, and the other went through the divorce procedures yesterday. Affected by his friend's sad emotions, Gong Tiankuo feels that marriage is too fragile, and it is better to be in love forever.
Gong Hanlin
Gong Hanlin's blood pressure soared sharply: "How does this work?" Do you know how much effort your mom and I put into this? Gong Tiankuo was annoyed: "Don't force me, I just don't want to get married." Gong Hanlin turned to Huang Yihui and hoped that she could do the work of doing her son. Who knew that she and her son's attitude were the same: "Uncle, I discussed with Tiankuo, let's talk about the marriage later, we enjoy our current life." Gong Hanlin could not accept the rebellion of the two children, and his heart was full of anger. However, he was inconvenient to vent to Huang Yihui, so he trained his son at home every day and forced him to get married with Huang Yihui as soon as possible. At first, Gong Tiankuo was silent; over time, he either resisted or evaded. Gong Hanlin tangled up...
In October 2014, Gong Hanlin was invited by a literary and art group in Beijing to guide several young actors to rehearse skits. The sketch tells the emotional state of several "post-80s" small couples, flash marriage and divorce. After consulting the information and communicating with marriage experts, Gong Hanlin learned that the "post-80s" only child has late psychological maturity and the divorce rate has increased year by year. Last year, a total of 3.5 million divorces were registered in accordance with the law, of which one-third were "post-80s". Most of them do not have enough psychological preparation to enter the marriage, and they cannot adapt to the roles of husbands and wives, so that there are many contradictions after marriage. Coupled with the lack of responsibility and tolerance, when there is a conflict, divorce is the only ending.
After guiding the sketch, gong Hanlin's heart became knotted. He called his son and Huang Yihui to his side and said calmly: "I will no longer force you to get married, marriage is your business, and you can get a license whenever you want in the future."
Gong Hanlin with his wife
Jin Zhu was unclear: "Which one are you singing?" Why is there a 180-degree turn in attitude? Gong Hanlin said the countermeasure: "Marriage is a major event in a lifetime, and children must enter marriage with a mature mindset." I'm going to start a marriage school at home, I'll be the principal, and you'll be the head teacher. "Jinzhu understands her husband's good intentions and supports Gong Hanlin's idea...
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="47" > "the happiest thing is to get married."</h1>
In mid-October, Mr. and Mrs. Gong Hanlin arranged the study in their home as a marriage class: a one-meter square teaching whiteboard hung on the wall, and two sets of tables and chairs were placed in the middle of the study. Gong Hanlin also purchased CDs and teaching materials for his son and Huang Yihui. He squeezes out 5 days a month to give lectures to young couples. Gong Hanlin listed one question after another on the whiteboard: "Do you have to get married?" "What is true love?" "What kind of marital relationship does the spouse want to have?" "How is the division of housework?" "What are the responsibilities and obligations of husband and wife...", popularizing the theoretical knowledge of marriage for young couples.
Gong Hanlin patiently explained to his son and Huang Yihui: "Responsibility, tolerance and patience are the three important principles of running a marriage, and if the husband and wife do not understand and study, they are digging their own graves." "The happy and harmonious stage of love is because of living by the parents' side, and everything is taken care of by the parents." After getting married, you have to do the seven things yourself; coupled with the pressure of work and the hard work of having children, then the troubles are constant, the romance fades, and you have to rely on responsibility, tolerance and patience. ”
Gong Hanlin and his wife with their son
In the marriage school, the golden pearl also plays an indispensable role. Using the experience of people who came over, she told her son and daughter-in-law: "When I first got married, I always couldn't understand my weaknesses, shortcomings and mistakes, and I could clearly see your father's faults, inadequacies, and wrongs. We also quarreled over this, and then I gradually understood that when you appreciate and share each other's strengths, you should also tolerate and share each other's shortcomings, so that the marriage can be balanced and long-lasting..."
I didn't expect that getting married is really not a simple thing, and you need to master so much theoretical knowledge. Gong Tiankuo and Huang Yihui benefited a lot. At the suggestion of Gong Hanlin, the two gave each other shortcomings and stored them in the mobile phone, reminding each other at the right time. Fireworks life is trivial and bland, and it needs to be artificially decorated and embellished. Inspired by the golden beads, the little couple creates romance with each other and surprises each other. For example, Gong Tiankuo quietly stuffed a fashionable headset into his girlfriend Kun's bag; Huang Yihui personally saved a string of peace beads and hung them in Gong Tiankuo's car.
Husband and wife live a life, only love is not enough, but also to master the "eighteen martial arts". In January 2015, Gong Hanlin and his wife began to let their son and Huang Yihuixue be "intern husbands" and "intern wives". In the past, Gong Tiankuo was at home to shake his hands and push the rice bowl, either brushing his mobile phone Weibo or going to the study to surf the Internet. From now on, Gong Hanlin asked his son to wash dishes, clean the sink, wipe the range hood, and clean the floor with a vacuum cleaner. Changing the faucet and lamp at home, Gong Hanlin no longer worries, but lets his son find a way to solve it by himself. In the past, Jinzhu often ran to the bank to buy water, electricity, gas, and pay telephone bills, but now Gong Hanlin gave these trifles to his son.
Influenced by Gong Tiankuo, Huang Yihui, who does not stick to the spring water of the sun, bought recipes and ingredients, and learned to make home-cooked dishes such as scrambled eggs with tomatoes and sweet and sour fish over and over again at home. When the cooking skills reached a certain level, she made several dishes such as squirrel fish, braised striped fish, and shredded meat with Beijing sauce, and then packed them in insulated barrels and carried them over to invite Gong Hanlin and his wife to taste. Gong Hanlin and Jinzhu tasted each dish and praised: "Our beautiful little yellow girl is not only superb in acting, but also so good in cooking, and blessed is this boy of Tiankuo." Huang Yihui's heart was sweet.
Moreover, Huang Yihui also consciously learned to iron clothes and sort out housework. She learned to think differently, and she no longer spoke sharply and aggressively. Especially in front of outsiders, she defended Gong Tiankuo's face everywhere; when there were differences of opinion, she also put forward them euphemistically behind people.
The maturity of the son and the daughter-in-law brought happiness to Gong Hanlin and his wife. In order to cultivate their love and sense of responsibility, Gong Hanlin often takes the little couple to the Beijing orphanage to volunteer. Over the course of the day, they fell in love with the cute kids. The two paid out of their own pockets to buy toys, clothes, and snacks for the orphans; told them stories and played games with them. In the process of taking care of the children together, the fatherly love and motherly love and tenderness lurking in Gong Tiankuo and Huang Yihui's hearts are stimulated, and they even expect to have a child.
Gong Hanlin family portrait
Mr. and Mrs. Gong Tiankuo and both parents
Gong Hanlin's series of "combination fists" have built his son into a good boy with a sense of responsibility, love, and pain. Huang Yihui also transformed into a virtuous, capable, gentle and good girl. In May 2015, Gong Tiankuo proposed to his parents: "I have discussed with Yihui and want to get married as soon as possible." Gong Hanlin deliberately teased his son: "Aren't you afraid of marriage?" Gong Tiankuo blinked mischievously: "You made us ripe." ”
On June 27, under the supervision of Gong Hanlin and his wife, the wedding of Gong Tiankuo and Huang Yihui was held in Beijing. Jiang Kun, Pan Changjiang and other heavyweight guests came to congratulate him. Gong Hanlin was dressed in a Tang costume, his hair was meticulously combed, he wore a pair of gold-rimmed glasses, and the corners of his eyes were overflowing with happiness. When addressing the guests, Gong Hanlin proudly said: "As a father, the happiest thing is to watch his son grow up and start a family..."
After marriage, worried that their parents would fall into the loss of the "empty nest of affection", Gong Tiankuo and Huang Yihui would be reunited with their parents every three to five years as long as they were in Beijing. The family made dumplings, sang Peking Opera, played badminton, and volunteered with charity organizations, and the family warmed the family of four. In October, at the invitation of the Ministry of Environmental Protection, Gong Hanlin's family mobilized a family of four to shoot a public welfare micro-film to curb soil pollution in Mentougou, Beijing, which attracted wide acclaim. Netizens praised them as "the most environmentally friendly and caring family"!
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