The ostrich mind means that you avoid talking about it, and you just want to procrastinate to solve your problems.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
This happens more often in marriage, because in marriage, you have at least one marriage certificate, and you have to pull this certificate away. But if you're in a couple's relationship, and the other party mentions breaking up, they don't need your consent at all.
That's what many people think, anyway, I'm hiding, I don't agree, you can't get married, what can you do with me?
Many people actually don't realize a problem, the essence of feelings lies in whether there is affection between you, marriage is also based on feelings, if there is no affection between you, your marriage is actually an empty shell, you just have no end in the legal sense.
When the other party insists on divorcing you, you are just maintaining a formality, and you have no communication and communication. Let's assume that you can last thirty years, and you still don't have happiness.
At the same time, if you use ostrich thinking to deal with marital problems, at this time it actually accelerates the other party's determination to leave you, because you are equivalent to letting the other party sue, but you have not communicated to deal with the problems between you at all, then the marital problems between you have never been resolved.
So the best way is to be able to communicate and solve, rather than just run away.
Especially when the other party just mentioned breaking up, the other party's attitude at this time is actually not so firm, and the mood is not so bad, at this time, if you sit down and communicate well, you may have the opportunity to reverse the other party's thoughts, or temporarily reverse, and you can strive for more opportunities for the follow-up.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
But if you avoid this problem at this time, it is equivalent to you letting the other party think about the problem of "leaving" or "not leaving", because you have not expressed your position, and the marriage problem has not been resolved, the other party will be in this pain, and this painful emotion will make him think about divorce further, and he will feel that only divorce can solve your pain.
If this situation continues for a long time, the other party will have the idea that they must divorce, and they will divorce no matter what, and at this time, if you try to redeem the other party, most of them will fail.
So under what circumstances can there be an ostrich mindset?
Here I also give you a little advice, if you have a very obvious conflict at this time, you can use ostrich thinking to alleviate your conflict concentration, which is a bit similar to the cold treatment after a breakup, which reduces the other party's emotions, and the follow-up communication will be smoother.
You can think of the ostrich thinking as a way of thinking about your relationship problems, and you just need to think about what it brings to the other person.
If the other party doesn't want to break up or divorce you at this time, but just gets your love by quarreling, the ostrich thinking at this time must be unacceptable.
If the other party proposes to end the relationship at this time, and there is no very positive and clear attitude, what you should actually consider at this time is how to communicate and communicate with the other party, figure out the problem in their mind, and then find a way to solve it, so that it is possible to save the relationship.
If the other party is more emotional when he proposes it, you can also temporarily avoid the conflict with the him, adopt a strategy of retreating, and wait for the subsequent TA to ease down and then solve the problem between you.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
In short, at this point when there is a rift in your relationship, what you have to do is not to think that waiting can produce results, but to think about how to solve the problem, which is the right way of thinking.
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