If we ask those who have failed to redeem their failures, we can find that many people have different reasons for their failures, some may feel that they are overly entangled, some may feel that they have said the wrong thing, and some people blame their exes for being too ruthless, etc.
But these people all have a common characteristic, that is, they do not understand the underlying logic of redemption clearly.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
I would like to make it clear here that I am not talking about an invincible set of redemption methods, because any specific method of redemption has limitations. The underlying logic in the redemption that I want to describe to you is the same, and many times, it is often simple and easy to understand.
It's just that many people are harassed by emotions, and they don't have time to take into account the logic I said, and they only care about letting emotions lead them forward, and then miss the opportunity to redeem them again and again.
The wrong way to redeem is a bit similar to drinking to quench your thirst, because you can have direct contact with your ex, so you always feel that a few words can help you get your ex back, but the more desperate you try, the farther away you will find your ex from you. When you look back, you realize that you really shouldn't be so impulsive.
I hope you will take my words to heart, that is, the wrong method, no matter how charming, will not lead you to the other side of success; No matter how unpretentious the right approach is, as long as it can help you move forward by one centimeter, it is also a closer place to recovery.
Let's move on to a few logical bases that you need to pay attention to when recovering:
Xiaoyu said to redeem
1. Redemption is definitely not convincing the other party;
The reason why most people find it difficult to recover is because you are convincing your ex, and then the ex does not agree to you, and you feel that it cannot be recovered.
It's kind of like playing house, I tell you to make it along, you say okay, and the two of you just have a good time.
But the real situation must be that if you say two words, you will turn back, then this hand is too hasty, so don't try to convince each other.
On the other hand, it is never possible for a person to convince another person, because it is always himself who can convince himself, and not anyone else.
2. To redeem, it is necessary to clarify the emotional needs of the other party;
Since it is a relationship between the sexes, then there is naturally an emotional need, and it is also because there is no emotional need in you anymore, so I choose to break up with you.
Since you want to redeem, you can't just focus on your own needs at this time, you need to understand what your ex's needs are, and then you can meet the needs of the other party, so that the other party can choose you again.
If you are just trying to impose your own love on the other person, then the other person does not say that you have to want this kind of love, and your contribution does not correspond to the other person's needs, how can you redeem it?
Xiaoyu said to redeem
3. Redemption can be said to be a process of finding the balance of your relationship;
The other party doesn't need your company at this time, so the initiative is in the hands of your ex at this time, but you want to redeem it very much at this time, and you can only be forced to cooperate with TA and please TA, so your relationship is unbalanced.
You need to create a point of demand for you in the process of recovery, your relationship is what you need, and you need you, so that your relationship can be balanced.
This also tells you not to blindly use the way of flattering kneeling and licking to redeem, but to manage your redemption with a balanced mentality, on the basis of your equal status, the other party can face up to your existence, and will also consider whether they should return to your side.
Finally, I wish you all good luck.
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