Different places have different customs, such as when should the New Year's money not be collected, some places usually do not collect the New Year's money after marriage, and some places do not collect the New Year's money after getting a job, etc.
Psychologists, on the other hand, are very unanimous in their views on the matter.
"Should I collect the New Year's money for the New Year this year?"
Before the Chinese New Year, although the younger generations in the family will be happy, but the "big children" at some "nodes" are excited with a wisp of anxiety.
For example, those who have just turned 18 years old, just got married, just got employed, etc., they don't know whether they should continue to collect New Year's money during the Chinese New Year this year, and they are still not a "child".
"I'm 18 years old this year, and I naturally want the New Year's money, but the New Year's money is for minors, right?
"I'm married, so it's a bit unreasonable to collect any more money, right? I feel like I'm on the side of adults. ”
"Why not? As long as the elders give it, I want it, after all, I am still a 'child' in the hearts of the elders. ”
"If I don't collect the New Year's money this year, I will feel a lot of pressure, and I am not ready to go into society alone!"
Different "big children" have their own different ideas and confusions, so at what age do children no longer collect New Year's money?
At what age should children stop collecting money? Psychologists are very unanimous
Psychologists have a relatively uniform view on when children should stop collecting their New Year's money.
They feel that whether the child should collect the New Year's money or not should be based on the child's own psychological state, so that the child can better adapt to his own identity, and have a more positive effect on the child's mental health and personal development.
Psychologists have three considerations when to stop collecting New Year's money:
(1) Consider the actual situation of the child
Many people believe that children's physical and psychological development should be consistent, and even if they are inconsistent, the difference will not be very large.
But in fact, in today's society, there is a large gap between the mental age and physical age of young people, and many people's psychological age maturity is seriously lagging behind.
For example, a 22-year-old child who has graduated from college may not yet meet the standard of "adult" in terms of mental age.
The occurrence of this situation will affect the actual situation of the child in life, that is, it may cause the child's marriage, work and other factors to lag for many years.
Children in this state, although they are adults, still need the care of their parents, and continuing to give their children New Year's money is a necessary means of financial support.
Therefore, whether the child should collect the New Year's money should be linked to the actual situation of the child.
(2) Consider the child's psychological situation
As mentioned above, there is a large gap between the mental age and physical age of many young people, and the psychological maturity will be later.
For example, many young people who have graduated from a bachelor's degree are generally 22 years old in age, and they have been adults for 4 years, so they should be an adult who is in charge of themselves.
However, we will find that after graduation, most college students do not have the characteristics that adults should have, whether in words and deeds, or in terms of emotions and emotions, but are in a state of "underage".
This is actually related to the fact that young people have no social experience, although they have already become adults in age, they have been living in the environment of "school", lack of social exercise, have not experienced the devastation of the years, and have not been beaten by society, so they are very psychologically immature.
The behavior of giving out New Year's money is not only a kind of financial assistance, but also a kind of care from the elders to the younger generations.
If the child's psychological maturity is low, and the elders also stop paying the child's New Year's money in this state, then the child will be subjected to a certain "psychological impact", and the child's psychology cannot achieve the transition, and various psychological problems may occur.
Therefore, whether the child should collect the New Year's money or not, we must take into account the psychological maturity of the child.
See if the child has psychologically adapted to this society, whether he is ready to "take charge of himself", and whether he can accept the storm of life and the impact of society.
(3) Consider the local customs and environment
The child's living environment will have a greater impact on the child's growth, including the cultural environment.
In other words, when we consider whether the child should continue to receive the New Year's money, we should consider whether the child's situation is in line with local customs and habits.
For example, the local custom is that the child should stop receiving the hair after marriage, so we can consider stopping the hair after the child gets married, why do we do this?
This is to keep the child in sync with the surrounding environment, so as to avoid abnormal changes in the child's psychology.
If we don't follow the custom and stop the hair after the child gets married, but we stop the hair when the child is not married, then the child may have low self-esteem and produce a lot of "mental internal friction", such as feeling that the elders don't like us, the parents don't love us, and so on.
And if we continue to send it after the child gets married, it may also lead to negative psychological situations, such as the child will think that the parents "underestimate" him, think that he is "not independent enough" and so on.
Therefore, whether the child is collecting money or not, must take into account the surrounding cultural environment.
Write at the end
Only by making a good transition to the child's psychological environment can the child achieve the best growth state, and this is also a cultural mission of the New Year's money. [Interactive topic]: At what age do you think children should not collect New Year's money?
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